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September 14, 2006
Home Work Battles; No More
I am a 34 year old mother with ADHD and have an 8 year old boy with severe adhd. My mom and I sat down the other day and talked about how she felt when I was in school about the subject of home work. Looking back now, I can say there are a few things I know about studying with adhd that I wish she would have known then. With ADHD children, most of them learn in a total opposite way. If what you are doing isn't working as well as you would like, try a different approach. Kind of like a back door, so to say. My son, even though he is only 8 has a different approach than children that are not ADHD. He does better at home work when he stands than when he sits. If he fidgets, that is perfectly fine with me. Although it does bother me, I know he cannot control it. I distinctively remember being told to sit still and stop moving around; to sit down, to stop swinging my legs, to turn off my radio, so it would be quiet. My mom would say, “Sit still!” over and over. I find with my son, if he is fidgeting, he is not focusing on sitting still. He is focusing on his studies. I know this sounds strange, but I've played it over with my son. And he does better if he is standing or lying down. Now, I'm not encouraging jumping or clapping; just try a different approach and if that doesn't work, try some thing different. You might want to sit down with your child and ask how he or she feels and what works best for him/her. Then build up from there. Most adhd children feel left out of the "loop" and need to have a feeling of control and giving him a bit of that control might just be what he/she needs. Give your child choices and work with him or her on finding what is best to accomplish these goals. Call your child’s teachers and ask what they think and what they see working in the class room. Find a middle ground that will work with your child. Keeping your child in on the decision making process is a very important part of the process. Most children, ADHD or not, need to have some control over the way they study. Giving your child some sense of power is important for them and helps raise self esteem.
By: Margo Richter
Posted by margo1 at September 14, 2006 06:23 PM
Comments
Thanks for this posting, it really helps to read what other people have to say. However, I seem to have a real problem with the teachers. My grandson is 7 and in the 2nd grade, but his teachers spend more time whining and complaining about his behavior than seeking solutions. They don't seem interested in anything but eliminating the problem, which I've tried to tell them is not going to just "go away." Any suggestions?
Posted by: Mickie Sykes at October 3, 2006 08:10 AM
I was just wondering how old your son is? Mine is 13 and wondering if the marble thing will work for him.
thanks
annie
Posted by: Annie at October 4, 2006 03:26 PM
message boards here: http://www.adhdnews.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=19898&PN=1 you will see how many parents are using this for children of all ages with and with out adhd and they are all seeing major improvements! read the thread and try it out. it really does work and you will be surprised at to how peaceful your house will be in less than one month! you can always pm me on the message board for any help my id is ogram.
Posted by: Margo at October 14, 2006 02:44 PM
Mickie, I would call a meeting with the principal, school counselor and the teacher and bring to the table what ever works at home with you and all of you come up with a system that works for him in the class room. The beauty of being the parent and/or care giver is you do have the power to make the school change the rules if what is being do does not work for your child. I suggest you do this with out waiting. make it a priority to change the way he is disciplined at school. The teacher might be letting off steam because you are there and do care, most parents/grand parents now days are too busy or don't care enough to give the effort you are. Keep me posted. You can find me on the message boards at www.adhdnews.com as "ogram" And as always, keep coming back, and keep the comments coming. Knowledge is power and power is success!
Posted by: Margo Richter at October 14, 2006 04:06 PM
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