Hawaii or bust?

Help!  I have a huge decision to make and I need some advice!  I am the mom to a great 9 yr son.  Last year he was dx w/ ADHD.  We went the stimulant route with awful side effects on each one.  He went through neuro psych testing this summer and was diagnosed with ADHD/OCD/GAD/ and a few nervous tics (no surprises).  We were told that we needed to treat the anxiety first, before the adhd, so he is on Celexa and doing much better.  But school hasn't started yet,which is his biggest source of anxiety.  Anyway, I am supposed to be going w/ my husband to a work related function in Hawaii next week and I am having 2nd thoughts.  DS will be staying in the same town w/ his grandparents, but we leave on his 1st day of school and I will be gone for a total of 4 school days.  My friends all think I'm crazy to pass up a free trip, but they don't have an ADHD child to worry about.  What should I do?  Am I crazy to feel this way? I am so torn.  What would you do??? 

benem wrote:
My friends all think I'm crazy to pass up a free trip, but they don't have an ADHD child to worry about.  What should I do?  Am I crazy to feel this way? I am so torn.  What would you do??? 

Friends dont have a clue with regard to have valid your concerns are uneyss they walk in your shoes and if they did they wouldnt say what they say. I can't tell you what you should do but ask yourself how much fun you will have with your mind miles away on your son and to complicate matters, its the first week of school. A free trip to Hawaii is awesome but if you think you and/or your son will pay a price in another way, its not crazy to consider not going. Good luck with your decision and make your decision based on what you think, not others they are really clueless.

How understanding and supportive of him are his grandparents? If they are right there for him, then maybe you should go. If they won't be supportive and willing to fight for him, you are right to really consider how your being gone will affect him.

How has he handled the first few days of school in the past? Does he start out fairly happy and fall apart when things start getting tougher a couple of weeks into the year, or is he miserable from day one? Do you think anxiety played a large part in his problems in the past and his med will counteract that somewhat?

You have a very tough decision to make. I will pray that you make the right one.

[QUOTE=benem]Thanks everyone for your comments -- how lucky I am to have found this supportive site!!!  I do have a tough decision to make (who thought going to Hawaii would be so hard ).  It 's so hard being a mom!  But I wouldn't change it for the world -- even after I just spent the last 20 min. rolling the toilet paper roll back up because my DS wanted to know how many sheets were left until the end of the roll.  He could care less what 9 x 5 is, but he has no trouble counting toilet paper !!!![/QUOTE]

  At least he is practicing his counting.

benem wrote:
 I do have a tough decision to make (who thought going to Hawaii would be so hard

Many decisions are hard when we have an ADHD child unfortunately and while peole can give opinions, no one should tell you what you should do or that your crazy for your concerns. You know your child and personal circumstances best so dont base your decisions on other peoples opinions. Every family has different dynamics and different personal circumstances and no one else walks in your shoes. There are no right or wrong answers and the best decision lies within you so go with your gut on this one. BTW, the question about the toilet paper was pure genius

I ditto everything Sue239 said.  Your son is going to be there when you get back.  Yes, it's hard to leave the first week of school, but you will have 35 more weeks of school when you return.  I might contact the teachers and explain you will be gone the first week, just in case something does happen.  The teachers can then say, "Oh, maybe he's just having a hard week without Mom!"  and not be too judgmental about any bad behavior he may have while you are gone .