to be a parent with adhd | ADHD Information

I have had no significant problems raising my son since being diagnosed.  My husband is very supportive and helpful, so we do just fine.  My husband takes our son to school, picks him up, and if I have work related duties, he watches him and gets him dinner, etc.

I tend to see it's often me who is more calm with my son in terms of discipline.  I work with kids all day, as does my husband, but my husband gets too frustrated.  I just lay down the law with my son but of course in a calm way. 

Social medicine doesn't seem to be in a hurry to assist non-life threatening conditions. You should move to the States, where most of the AD/HDs have. And ended up on the West Coast. At least you can go to the doctor when you want and tell him what you have and what you want for it. As long as you can afford it.

Anyway, I'm OLLLLDDD, have 4 kids (F9, F15, M18, M23), 3 with ADHD, and I and my wife have it. The kids are still alive, my wife is still alive, and I'm still alive (to the depression of many, I think).

Sooo, hang in there, demand your medical rights, ask for the medicine if they don't offer it, study up on AD/HD coping mechanisms, and ask your loved ones for help (like your hubby: maybe he can do more dishing, washing, vaccing, etc.).

One of my tricks: do a lot of different things at once. Like wash the clothes while you're cleaning house (it's okay if you add some clothes during the rinse cycle... if they're not too dirty, he won't notice!), and disshing.

Also, have an oversupply of important items, like underwear, spoons, and cereal bowls. And diapers. That way, if they don't get cleaned everyday, at least you have a clean supply. Terrie likes turning her's inside out. Not her diapers, tho. Her spoons...

Good luck, and congrats on the baby. She'll probably have AD, too, so keep an eye on her.
Thank you, Barb! I will check out them.

melly73: I don´t either think the problem for me is to raising our doughter. I easily get stressed and I am very easily disturbed. But I nerver let the feelings come out on her.

It is more like I´m getting very easy tired and don´t have energy to do ANY own things. And it is, of course, very important to have time for that. Another problem is of course planning the days. We have special times for our doughter, when it´s time for eating and sleeping. But still it feels like the days are very chaotic. Often I just wish the day would end, so I just can read and do some stiching and then go to sleep. I can´t really calm down when she´s sleeping for a while in the days, because I can´t concentrate when I´m just thinking "when she will wake up?" Also I know I get in a bad mood when I get interupt, and that is of course what I´m going to be when she wakes up. So I avoid to start to do things I want or have to do.
Also when she´s screaming is very stressing, because I´m extreamly sensitive for sounds, so I just want to scream myself. How to learn to get along with it? Is there any ways?

The main thing for me is anyway that my baby is feeling well. She´s happy and spreading joy around her. I always have to smile at her when she´s playing and laughing, even if I´m crying.

I always have wished that I could have many children, and still do. But in other hand I´m thinking if I really can manage it. I guess it demands GOOD planning to have many children.

I do think I´m good enough as a mother, but I wish I could be a happy mother TOO, someday.

AND I really wish that the diagnosis will lead to something good (like better therapy, meicines?) I have went to SO many therapist before, and they have just complained at me when I have told them my problems. I guess complaining isn´t a very effective way of helping

Welcome!  

Why not check out the alternative treatments forums while you are waiting for your diagnosis? You may be able to find relief from at least some of your symptoms there.

Thank you for the tip! Maybe I can order the book from internet. Guess it can be hard to find it here in Finland......

Well, I guess it feels difficult too because I´m often depressed and having anxiety and a lot of other problems caused of the adhd. But...of course I´m enjoing spend time with my baby girl too. It seems like she´s well and happy even if it´s not so well with me all the time.

I have 2 children and my house has never been clean!!

Relax and enjoy your 1 year old... He or she will remember what a great and fun mommy you are more than she will remember how many dirty dishes were in the sink!

When you are feeling a bit industrious, I would suggest a great book called the "messies manual" from Sandra Felton. Her books helped me immensly get at least a simblence of control in my household chores.

Dont get me wrong, my house is still a mess but its clean under the clutter!!

Sherry

I have read on this forum sometimes, and this will be the first time I´ll write here.  I have not got any diagnosis of adhd yet, but my doctor told me it is adhd I´m having for sure.

I just wonder, if here´s any other with adhd having children? Do you think it´s difficult  because of you´re adhd? Can you tell me about your experiences?
I´m having a 1 year old baby, and I´m finding it very difficult sometimes. Especially to organize the days. It´s hard for me to get things like washing, cleaning and dishing done. Luckily we are two persons at home right now. If I was staying at home alone it would be like a cathastrophy in the house!

Anina,

I also have a 1 year old.  A son.  My ADD symptoms came up in full force after having him.  Both my husband and I work full time.  But I honestly don't know if I could be a stay at home mom with him.  I love my son but I need a break from everything in my life at one point or another.  Working lets me relax from my family at times. 

It took me a while to realize that I've had ADD since I was at least 13.  But it didn't dawn on me before I had my son because my husband is very organized and I can follow his example.  So my ADD symptoms were just an occasional annoyance.  Until my son came along and I started to get overwhelmed by stress, lack of sleep, etc.

I just got some books on Moms with ADD, and Women with ADD.  I'll probably will be giving some feedback on these books on the Book forum page - so keep a watch there in the next several weeks for that!

Autumn