Need a Boost | ADHD Information

bluebird -

I - and all of us here can relate to how dark and hopeless life can seem when the ADHD takes us and pulls us under.

It's easy for us to become hyperfocused on one thing - your job for you right now.  Remember that we are not our jobs.  Do your best that you can do - and leave it at that.

The one thing that always seemed to tie my ADHD symptoms together over time was my hating to disappoint.  I was always trying to make others happy with me - my work and my efforts at things.  When I inevitably disappointed someone it always left me beating myself over it.

The fact is - some people will never be happy with you.  It's a fact of life sadly.

You can't be everyone's friend or everyone's hero.  No matter how good and how hard one works - there's always people who will not like you or approve of you.  We're all different and see things from different perspectives. 

 As a matter of fact -  it's very rare to be approved of by your co-workers unless you are lucky and work in a great place.  Work is mostly competitive and people will try to play you and your weaknesses and they hope you will fail.  Many people aren't happy unless all the people around them are unhappy.

Thankfully you have a pet to give and get love from.  That's better than many get these days.  Love is what we should focus on - it's the only thing that really counts in life when you strip it down to its' essentials.

If you ever need a shoulder to lean on - or an ear to hear you feel free to ask!

 

Your friend in ADD indeed

- Glen

Barb, thank you. I really appreciate that. 

I decided to get as un-mad as possible this time; want to just move on. I've been mad in the past in different situations and it feels like it makes it worse for me. I will admit that the job was overwhelming and I dropped the ball in many ways. I have the need to remember that I am not stupid or unknowledgeable. I just can't keep things organized.  It just wasn't a smooth transition, and it helps to remember that "it's just business."

I do appreciate the soft words. I need them right now. I am so happy I have my sweet dog who always gives me a smile and a hug. We went swimming today and both had baths after--we're both sitting here fresh and clean and tired. What a perfect day.


I'm really thankful to find such nice people who can relate to my struggles.

bbird




        BlueBird > > >

                                      Your welcome !

                I almost wrote another one but it just

                  didn't have " it " .

[QUOTE=bluebird38] They tried to get me to train my replacement before I left (as though I wouldn't notice--"Uh, turn your files over to us and let <lady> know how to do what you do>). [/QUOTE]

Get mad! You should have asked them why they were hiring someone to do a job you know how to do when she doesn't! They should just keep you and give you some accoms to enable you to do the job.

Please don't feel bad. They don't know what a gem they are losing. You are now able to find something which is better suited to your personality and you don't have to put up with their *^%* anymore!

We all love and appreciate you here BB!

(((((((bluebird))))))))

i don't have any words of wisdom right now except to say that i know how you feel.  i don't know what you believe, but i happen to believe that everything happens for a reason.  maybe this will lead you to bigger and better things.  maybe this happened so you could learn something that you will need later.  i don't know...  but you're NOT alone... especially here. 




           BlueBird don't be too blue
              it's not all because of you.
           We do all that we can
              when life doesn't play fair.
            I can't understand all your pain
               that you feel at this time.
            Words in the air
               Hope you know I care. I need to hear from someone with magic, kind words...

Please tell me that just because I lost this client (my only one right now) to a real nasty lady that there is still a place for me and to stay cool, calm, and collected. My confidence is wavering today.

I KNOW the reason why I lost the account--I dropped the ball--I'm the picture of ADHD and I did let them down (not deliver and not meet deadlines). It was a slow death.  I do have a LOT of knowledge however, that the new lady has benefitted from.

The lady who is getting the account is so snotty and bold. They tried to get me to train my replacement before I left (as though I wouldn't notice--"Uh, turn your files over to us and let <lady> know how to do what you do>). I, tactfully, told them 'no' and turned down some pay. I couldn't bear to. 

It's hard to tell my friends or family about this. So far, I have only told a couple of people. I hate having my family see me this way and asking what I'm going to do next.

bb


thank you pilgrim and lilo.

lilo, thank you. i don't know what i believe anymore either. maybe just that something needs to work out.  i know i'm not worthless altogether; just in certain circumstances.

pilgrim, thank you for your thoughtful poem.
Thanks very much Glen. It's amazing how much I love this dog. I took her to work with me the last few times I was there (she goes as a Service Dog). When things got particularly stressful, it was so wonderful to just take her leash and walk for about a 1/2 mi. It felt like I was truly getting away with something.   Maybe that's why I'm not as upset and I might have been--they weren't able to take HER away from me. I think I hear the start of a Whitney Houston song in there somewhere.  LOL

I think I am kind of past this company for the most part. I am ready to move on. One thing that is good is that I am very aware of my weaknesses, but luckily (from studying ADHD and reading these boards and my parents), I am quite aware of my strengths. I am having to step through fear and uncertainty and try out things that would actually interest me rather than panicking myself into a hateful job where I will eventually anger someone b/c of my issues.

You know what's weird about moving on? I am constantly startled by an email from former co-workers that say, "I hear you aren't working here anymore!" or "Please return your badge" etc. I am in another world and it's like I have forgotten that they exist. heh heh 

You know? I am great in emergencies. I would be the person you would want on board if the pilot of an airplane had a heart attack. Knowing nothing about flying, I could probably still manage to land us all to safety--maybe even comfortably. Would I have a further interest in flying? Naah, probably not. Interviewed on TV? Naah. Just let me play with my dog and go and adopt a couple more.

So, as of today, I'm feeling quite happy. I've decided to work temps while I pursue and develop some things of interest to me: specialty dog training, teaching (various subjects), and a writing business.

I used to think my only strength and interest was sleeping. I'd read these career books that had exercises to help you determine a good career fit and I'd think,"Ok, if I were honest, I'd have to ask 'how can I get paid to sleep?" I'm so happy to report that I feel different now, I actually have some interests and awareness that I'm not a waste of air. I know that if I were successful financially I need an admin. assistant, a housekeeper, and a bookkeeper.  See? I would be responsible for creating jobs!

I really, really do appreciate the kind words...seriously.

bb




bluebird3838604.323900463Thanks Sabina. I have been on meds for awhile. I guess I'd rather just put my energy into my next endeavor than spending much time dwelling on unpleasant stuff. Need my brain power to create good stuff.

Hi Bluebird, glad to hear that place is out of your orbit, are you on meds now and that's why you feel differently? about sleep I mean, I ask as I too have spent much time doing same...the only relief from being awake? Nice to hear all the support for you, this society does not look kindly on different unless it has been sanctioned...I wish you luck in your quest for a more suitable job, we all deserve to enjoy our work and feel good about it and using the adhd gifts feels good (even when I didn't know about the adhd I knew what my brain was doing was...unusual?)

I find that super hectic, creative and always changing makes me happiest at work and I've been lucky in that I landed a job where my boss gave me freedom to do as Ilked (I ended up doing her job for her but that's another story) and I have spent most of my time around kids which is the best. I've accepted I get along better w/them..it was kinda scary actually, for a number of years I became good friends w/ about 5 students and would go out with them sometimes and you could tell when I was with them it was as if I was the same age in a way! I love to bug them and kid around w/them, thank God for the meds because I had even lost my ability to do that some of the time. When students don't know me and I start talking to them and if they are shy or more conservative they just stare at me, I guess they don't know how to take me...I suspect this happens a lot w/adhd people

I have a sign on my office door, it has a picture of a big he bull and it says underneath "NO BULL". I figure that's warning enough!
I'll say a lttle prayer that you find a place to work where they love you for the person you are (not that they do where I work...oh  nooooo) you sound like a smart cookie