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I explain to my daughter that her ADD & LD are like a road block in her brain. I tell her in life if we encounter a road block we don't just give up & sit there; we find an alternate route to our destination & thats what she needs to do. She needs to find an alternate route to learning. She wants to be a veterinarian when she grows up & I have all the confidence that she WILL acchieve her dreams!

Hi I have severe case of adhd a combination fo both innatintive and hyperactive subtype as well as a wide aray of learnign disablities (dislexia is one fo them so the spellign in this message will be bad) My name is Nick and I am just about to sit my major high school exams and I am doing ok I have a good social life a good home life and I am trying my best and I want to know what i should do and if anyone feels like i do.

I feel like I am a loser a fialure an idiot and as if my trying for the my major exams is a waste of time and that by tkaing the risk of actaully tryign for these exams i will just prove that i am an idiot. I have hated school for that reason not any other. I have always failed accidmenically at school and it has led me in the past into depression because i dont know why i cant do well and yet everyday i see poeple do better than me at school. I have been all the way through high school had comments on my rpeort card along the line of is "highly intllegent but yet is is failing and must try harder/be more organised/work on hand writting ectra?" and after a little while i stopped beleiving the first bit cause honestly who is goign to say on a report card that your son is and idiot? isnt it much easier to say that he just has to try harder be more organised ectra?. I have almost statered to belive the way I think is wrong that because i cant slow donw my trian of thought to write I am a retard. what shoudl i do? What should i think? What web page or book can explian this feeling of being a failure to me? Is there anyone who has goen throguh the same thing and can help me? I have gotten alot of information about myslef through reading what other poeple have written about me to other poeple, books written for parents coping with children with adhd and web sites that make me feel like i am sick. I havent ever seen a web site dedicated to the poeple who are tryign to deal with adhd that talks about the the stuff that I am going through.

 

Any comments, thoguths please post them

oh nick

don't worry some of the greatest architects in the world are dyslexic.
honestly it seems you almost have to be dyslexic in order to have the
space in your brain for that creative, visual side (these guys can THINK in
3D - something i will never be able to do - but because that is the part of
their brain that is so active is squashes out the reading and writing part -
it's just the way it is).... being dyslexic has NOTHING to do with whether
you will or won't succeed in the real world.

honestly, i am english and there is an extremely popular, well-paid, well-
known JOURNALIST who is completely dyslexic, he talks about it a lot (his
name is A A GILL). maybe you can find some of his articles on google, he
is funny, literate, insightful - he just can't put the letters together in the
right order but that hasn't stopped him at all.

can i put it this way John Major (former prime minister of England, never
went to university); Richard Branson - entrepreneur founder of Virgin
Records and Virgin Air (dropped out of high school); Rupert Murdoch -
news proprieter multi-megalomaniacal super-power in his own right
(actually i forget - i think someone told me he was a high school dropout
but i might be getting him confused with Robert Maxwell now i come to
think about it!)

Bill Gates - dropped out of university right. Stephen spielberg finally
decide to get his college degree three years ago or something.

forget flipping exam results unless you want to be some corporate drone
or work in the civil service.... irrelevant. totally. it is just a fascist
conspiracy to force parents into huge guilt about paying for some way
over the top-education/college fees so that they will be enslaved by debt
their entire life and never have time to consider a revolution against the
plutocracy that upholds this skewed system (hahaha - don't worry about
all that last bit just my usual political rant).

but seriously, no they wouldn't say intelligent unless you were intelligent
--- all you need is a little confidence, some good looks, loads of money
and and then you can take over the world (just joking).

Napoleon was starving in a garret with paper taped over the windows in
order to keep warm. and look how far he got (all the way to Elba! hah -
pesky English always interfering in great plans!) but he was a great man -
forget spelling for goodness sake. it is neither here nor
there. i can spell perfectly and look how far i have got (not!).

do as well as you can in your exams - but the lesson to learn from exams
is the knowledge you gain from them and the ability to be able to learn to
work hard and persist... the results are not the be all and end all.

don't make yourself sick. don't worry, if you can - get a sense of humour
about it. and develop some coping mechanisms --- most of all, don't
write yourself off before you have even started. at least wait until you are
34 to do that!      chjones38608.8509606481

Nick, I haven't gone thru what you go through but I have an 11 year old daughter with inattentive  type ADD & I've seen similar comments on her report card. Your post made me think.....made me realize how she must be feeling. I can tell you that I try to see things objectively & even though she all but fails math classes (math LD) and has barely legible handwriting, people can see the smart side of her as well. In her case its reading & creating stories. As her parent I try to encourage her in those areas so she can see her self-worth. Think about yourself; I'm sure you have some things that you excel in......your teachers must see your acedemic strengths or, as you say, why would they not leave that bit out altogether "highly intelligent". Heres A quote from one website:

"If you have ADHD, it's natural to feel misunderstood and frustrated at times. It might seem like you're always losing your homework or having trouble following teachers' instructions, or you may have trouble making friends or getting along with your family members. It helps to learn as much as you can about yourself."

Heres one ADHD site geared towards teens:

http://kidshealth.org/teen/your_mind/

I tried to find others, but you are right that they are few & far between. I think you should take the exams & sure, you won't excel at every part of them, but no-one does. Your strengths will shine through. I'm sorry if I wasn't much help. I'm sure you'll get many more responses. You have given me much to think about though.

Nik,

Pete Wright is a brilliant special ed attorney. He argued the Shannon case in Supreme Court and WON! The Shannon case was against a school system which continually failed a girl and whose parents had to spend a ton of money to get her an education. It is extremely hard to win a case in the supreme court.

Pete Write is dyslexic and had to have copius notes read to him and put on tape. He had to memorize pages of stuff as he wasn't allowed to have his tapes in court. You can read his story at www.wrightslaw.com

Charles Schwab is a millionaire entreupeneur businessman who is self made. He is ADHD.

The founder of Jet Blue is ADHD and attributes it to his ability to conceive the idea of an airline anyone can afford to fly on.

? Hallowell, the man who wrote "Driven From Distraction" is a Harvard psychiatrist and has ADHD.

You are intelligent and want to succeed. We believe in you and want to see you succeed. What are your strengths? What do you enjoy doing? Find what you like to do best and apply yourself to doing that.

If you need further education to realize your dreams, go for it! Talk to your dr and find out what meds you can take to help you focus.

You can learn to type and use spell check. You can have someone take notes, read to you, help you study.

There are ways you can use your strengths to work around your weaknesses.

I'll tell you what I tell my son. You have the intelligence to do and be whatever you want. You have to work harder and look for ways around your weaknesses, but you can do it!