Falling apart at work. Help Please!!! | ADHD Information

omalley....i dont have any suggestons but am sure someone on here will...i just wanted to say....itll get better...and you are in my thoughts....i wish u the bestI had the same deal. I did not talk to them I would just joke about it and say Oh I forgot to take my ritalin today. Everyone that I work with is used to it now. We all joke about it. If I am out of control they will say take your medicine! I have days where I will give 200%. I have days that I give 10%. However since I have big days everyone knows that I am a good worker. So on a day where I just want to slack and be online all day no one notices. I would not have a talk with them I would just joke about it.

I need help so badly. I'm 35, took my first full-time job last november (was in school, raising kids and/or working part-time) and I was diagnosed with ADD two months ago. It was only in doing research about my 7-year-old son that I figured out that I have it. It explains my whole life... I'm severe... but at work, I'm outstanding some days and on others I can't file and I send stupid impulsive emails. I started ritalin, which helps, but only so much.

I go for a while and I don't have problems filing but then my boss with come to me with papers I stapled together that having nothing to do with each other. I work for a police department so this is a big deal. What do I do?! Do I have rights to say that I have a learning disability and I should have some protections from a bad evaluation b/c I'm trying so hard. It makes me cry because I'm the most efficient, hard-working employee in my division except for the stupid, stupid things I do sometimes. Does anyone have any suggestions for talking to my boss? I've taken steps to check, recheck and triple check myself but sometimes it doesn't work. How do I explain this to them? Please, please help me!

Hi.

I'm so glad I found this thread. This gave me a lot to follow up on. I was "diagnosed" with ADHD about 6 years ago and was prescribed Ritalin, with the dosage increased over the years. Unfortunately, I relied strictly on my physician and the prescription for "treatment", without any recommendation of coaching or any additional support.
I can relate to omalley, being in a workplace where there is little room for error. I'm a software developer who wears many hats in the office, and is easily distracted. I'm also in a supervisory position, who has to monitor product development and deadlines of others, including my own. It's tough enough when you have to monitor progress and deadlines of others, when you can't monitor or track yourself. To compound the situation, I'm in a family business where my oldest brother is the president. I tought that he would be somewhat sympathetic with my situation because he has children with learning disabilities and ADD. I guess you can't assume anything. The family business situation as consequently affected my home situation. My wife has gotten tired of it and her patience has worn thin. She did some research months ago and found a doctor/psychiatrist for me to visit, and I lost the name and number.

I guess shock nailed it on where I should go. Progress on my part will go a long way. I recently signed up with a local ADHD support organization who meets about 2 miles from home and will get on the job of making the appointment with the psychiatrist, (if I can find my wife's note).

I, too, think it's good that you talked to your supervisor and let him know you have a bona fide problem. You may want to also let him know that it's a condition covered by the ADA (Americans with Disabilities Act--that's a little bit of job security for you--espcially since you're a government employee) and ask for his recommendations on how the problems you face might be solved. It's a supervisor's job to help employees do their best work. IOW, enlist him as a partner in solving the problem. That's part of his.

Fro example, if you can identify when you're having a bad day, maybe you two can set things up so that another employee checks your work. On the other side, when you're having a good day, volunteer to do something in return to help others in the office so that you're not viewed as a burden who can't carry the weight of her job. Play to your strengths, whatever they may be.

Work with a counselor, therapist, or coach to help you learn to quickly identify when you're "on it" and when you're not, before you even get to work so you can compensate appropriately. Self-knowledge is half the battle.

If your supervisor is the type who doesn't want to help you rather than work with you, then start looking for something else because it's not going to work out. Unless they feel threatened about an ADA complaint and keeping you is a path of least resistence for them. But even if that's the case, you likely won't be happy and will remain on edge.

I also agree with others that administrative tasks aren't generally the best ones for AD(H)D folks to have. I realized years ago that I was far less able to do "simple" jobs than intellectually challenging ones but didn't know why. I've generally been able to "fake it" for 6 months to a year before starting to run into problems, though. Now I'm realizing that business and I a matter of the round hole and square peg. Too bad because it pays very well. I've concluded that research, writing, and academia are likely much better fits for me and have to figure out how to make money doing it. Many do through writing, speaking, and consulting, but I've got work to do to figure out how, exactly, to go about that. But I'm on disability now and won't finish my PhD for another year or more, so plenty of time for that.

You might also ask your supervisor if there's another job in the department that plays more to your strengths and less to your weaknesses--whether there's an open slot or not. Generating a plan for the future never hurts.

[QUOTE=GlenW]

I'll bet you are an exceptionally hard worker! I am as well - yet I've lost more jobs than most people probably have held. More than 3 months of faking normal and it all starts to slide. It's almost like a self-destructive streak - and it leaves you screaming as you fall down the same hole every time.

[/QUOTE]

WOW !!! GlenW you really nailed it !!!!!!!!!! That is what I did, also......

I hope you can work this out and not have to keep going through jobs like I did, and GlenW did, and probably most of us here have!!!! I just could never fake it long enough to make it.........no matter how hard I tried...and then I would get so frustrated that I would set myself up to be fired...(can't take the easy way out and quit !!) I wish I had known about ADD earlier.....But I love what I do now, I am my own boss and I can stay home a lot of the time, so I really am not disappointed about losing those jobs, I just wish I'd felt better about it at the time. I know I was horrible at filing..it was too detail oriented for me, and BORING, which didn't help.....

Good Luck to you and hope everything gets better. Kimberly

[QUOTE=Davidornado]*ack! It's Friday! My fake Cocaine has worn off, and I can't find my fake Ritalin! Ask me again on Monday, sweety. I'm gonna go smoke a biscuit cigar right now.[/QUOTE] yeah ok like i will remember...my meds are beginning to wear off now too..but thanks anyway[QUOTE=Davidornado]

Employers do have to make accomodations for mental disabilities. There are specific ADHD recommendations in the EEOC literature for employers to follow. I suggest that now you've spoken with your supervisor, you talk to the HR manager and officially announce your ADHD, and request reasonable accomodations. It could be as simple as a cubicle, so there's no visual distraction, or allowing a radio on at low volume for audible distraction mitigation.

Good luck!

[/QUOTE]

where do you find the eeoc literature for employers to follow? can u send me a link or where to find it? thanks davie boy

*ack! It's Friday! My fake Cocaine has worn off, and I can't find my fake Ritalin! Ask me again on Monday, sweety. I'm gonna go smoke a biscuit cigar right now.

omalley, hope things are okay for you now at work...that was brave of you. You’ll have good karma for that…telling the truth

I can tell the people I've spoken to, my doc and a coach don't seem to think I should say anything. I just heard another rumour about some absurd and insulting scheme the suits have which may involve moving me from one hole of an office (cute hole though) to God knows what hellish situation. I have quite a bit of computer equipment and I do a lot of work on the server and troubleshooting constant tech problems and I need my own space, I get so easily distracted. I might feel compelled to tell them if they try to pull a nasty one but they aren't exactly the most feeling folks in some ways and they see me as trouble so I too am worried. They love what I do but they don't love me, not admin anyway. Some of them also dislike me cause they know nothing about technology and feel threatened. Sheesh!
Maybe I should go down to the counselor who does the "ld" kids and come out to him.....
Guys, reading the earlier posts I just wanted to make comment on the fact that I don't think adhd is a condition or a disability or a mental illness and it sure blew my life out the window but I think that's more to do w/my co-morbs, lousy genetics, crummy start in life and general mistreatment throughout (what is wrong w/that girl??)so that I ended up stressed out and messed up...I just can't be like everyone else and I long ago stopped trying except in specific areas, like being more responsible for my actions

adhd is brain chemistry. I think calling it a "disorder" is even pushing it. I say this because this implies that our brain chemistry is not in order but the nonadds is. Well, I look around me and I see alot of apathetic, self absorbed, slow moving. slow thinking people. Exactly what Glen W. said, I can get more work done in one day than three average people and I can learn on the fly, initiate, troubleshoot, do both tech and creative work. But, I am also unable to accomplish very much out of work and that's where nonadds have it over me.

I’m kinda surprised you were encouraged to come out so quickly, isn’t there a lot of prejudice out there?

[QUOTE=omalley]

I spoke with my supervisor today and tried to explain what is going on. He was nice and easy to talk to but I get the feeling that it's a hard explanation to buy. However, it looks like we were able to see that I make these stapling and filing errors when something else is going on in my life. This week it was a serious amount of stress and the last time was right after we got back from vacation. I told him that I would redouble my efforts and that I would try to avoid that task if I'm feeling something else is going on. I think it's fine but I'm still worried.

Thank you all for your advice and support!

[/QUOTE]

Omalley,
AWESOME! First tough step is out of the way! Be sure to let your supervisor know that you are going to seek help from a professional and that you are going to take the appropriate measures to overcome your "problem". Whatever you do, DO NOT say "Oh, I have Adult ADD" and use it as an excuse for things. That will really annoy people and your supervisor. You have to go see a psychiatrist. Also, like I said in an earlier post, read read read read read whatever you can on Adult ADD and take steps for better organization and rearranging your life and the way you do things. We ADDers are use to doing things a certain way, which actually have been hurting us our whole lives, now we need to learn how to change the way we do things in order to do them correctly. With the appropriate steps, a visit with a psychiatrist and the right medication, you will know what it's like to be a "normal" person and worker. I guarantee your boss will see a massive change in your work habits if you follow my words. My boss told me that everyone has mentioned how completely different I am from 6 months ago. Imagine my yearly review I had when half of it was horrible and the other half was off the charts fantastic! He said that if he wasn't aware of what was going on with me that he would have been completely baffled and would have thought I was on drugs...which, technically, I am (Adderall XR 30mgs) :)

I will send you a Private Message with very useful info.

Shock
I believe most people with ADHD are the hardest working people there are. For filing Sometimes the "handle once" just doesn't work. Can you put papers that need to be stapled in another bin, then later, check them before you file? Might take a little longer, but could cut down on errors.

Any other ideas, ya'll?

adhd isn't necessarily considered to be a learning disability..

i'm adhd and not learning disabled..

i would be careful about how i would phrase things to your boss.. leave yourself notes, take a deep breath, and just remember you are only human...

we all make silly mistakes and can be forgetful.. i don't think filing and admin work is the most appropriate vocation for an adhder either..

adhd is sometimes known as 'executive syndrome'.. that means having problems organising things..

good luck!! and be proud to be who you are!!

I used to make all sorts of filing errors at school. Papers would disappear and reappear like ghosts floating around my classroom!! I didn't even remember putting them there.

I have really been helped by some exercises from a book called Stopping ADHD. Now, my papers are in order. I can find things. I take care of things on my desk and it is actually cleared off each day. I'm not perfect at it, but I have stopped losing papers and misplacing things. I also remember things - meetings, etc - a whole lot better. Maybe the exercises can help you too.

Thank you all for your advice and support!

Good luck!

Its OK not to be good at everything. Don't beat yourself up for sucking at being a clerk. I totally suck at being organized. Thank God I have found a job where I am supposed to know everything about everything related to computers, programming and technology.

Maybe start shopping for something a little less boring!

Hang in there and relax!

HowieOmalley, get your buns to a psyhciatrist and get on a med! TRUST ME ON
THIS ONE! I am speaking from experience. Also, go to the library and read
whatever you can on Adult ADD. Research the net for Adult ADD and see,
you are not alone and that there is help for you. Go see a psychiatrist, get
on Adderall XR or whatever and then TELL YOUR BOSS WHAT IS GOING
ON. Tell the people you work closely with that you have been diagnosed
with Adult ADD. I have info from CHADD.org, email the info to your boss
and co-workers, it will make everything you do make sense to them. Like
I said, TRUST ME on this. It's tough to tell people what's going on but
believe me, once you do you will feel a billion times better. Don't use ADD
as an excuse because it's not, it's an explanation. Send me a Private
Message and I will send you the Chadd.org ADD info. I was in your shoes
a while back and now the world and work is better then ever!

To quote the great Bob Marley: "Don't worry, 'bout a thing...cos every
little thing, gonna be alright now..."
shock38632.4192013889

omalley - I agree with shock. Get into a psychiatrist and discuss where you are at right now.

Although ADHD isn't necessarily a learning disorder - it certainly can be! At either rate - it's still a disorder - as it clearly causes our lives to become dysfunctional and interferes with day-to-day events like work, relationships, etc.

You should tell your boss - privately - that you have ADHD and what it means to your work. Probably go to a psych first and get pointers at how to explain so others can understand. I'm sure you can see that it's easy for us to understand the inner works but others who don't have the insight will not.

Just keep in mind that you won't be making excuses - you have a legitamate illness and others will have to understand that you are working hard to compensate and avoid the mistakes you make.

Also - since you find that the ritalin works "for a while" - perhaps mention that to your MD and he/she might either up your dose or help you choose another more potent medicine? Since it works short term I would assume that either your dose is too low or maybe an extended release (XR) medicine might be best for you - especially to work during an 8 hour day.

Good luck to you - and make sure you let us know how this works out!