I’m a MESS | ADHD Information
Hi Sarah,
I think almost anyone with ADD ends up being depressed. Most of us have spent our whole lives working twice as hard as everyone else just to keep up and still are called "lazy".
And don't worry about anyone thinking you are a hypochondriac, our family has had a number of medical and other issues befall us in the course of about 4 years. We have a family member with multiple physical problems. They are very obvious, and it seems very unfair that so many things can happen to one person. But sometimes it does.
I think a good coach is the best thing. But I also ran into a book on organization for ADD that may help. It is called "ADD-Friendly Ways to Organize Your Life" by Judith Kolberg and Kathleen Nadeau. It is available on Amazon.com as well as most large bookstores.
The most important thing is to talk to the great people here and know that you are not alone!
Sarah- Welcome and I'll keep you in my prayers!!! I know that it's tough right now and things sound absolutely overwhelming! We are all here to help you along this path!
A palm piloit helped me before I was diagnosed with ADD... it beeps at me 1hour before any scheduled appointments! You can have it remind you when to do everything! My palm tells me when bills are due and when to change the air filter in the bathroom and everything!
Just remember to breathe. When things become overwhelming.... breathe and come up with a plan. It's ok to not finish everything today. I chant to myself "God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference" over and over until I am calmer.
One day at a time.......
Hi -I was officially diagnosed two weeks ago....this is good news
and bad news!
Good- because there is a reason that I can't seem to
accomplish anything and every area of my life is a mess. And
Bad- because there is yet something else wrong with
me.
I am Bi-Polar- Type II, have degenerative disc disease, and
fibromylasia and NOW ADD too! I don't even want to tell
anyone about it because I am sure that they will think that I am
a hypochondriac.
My doctor has put me on provigil - (at least for now, I don't think
that I can afford it after this month) for both the ADD and to help
me stay awake when driving. It is working to help keep me
awake, but doesn't seem to be doing anything for the ADD.
I need someone to help me manage my life - to set up a
schedule and tell me what to do...but, I do not know how to go
about finding someone ( I guess that is what a coach is) I have
looked for a support group, but cannot find one in my area
(even though I am in the Orlando area.)
My house, my van, my schedule, and my brain are sooooo
cluttered and confused. I keep working on everything, but feel
like I am making no headway. Seems like I make more mess
as soon as I clean something out.
I cannot even seem to do the most simple thing - like make
dinner - without blowing off EVERYTHING else. And what is
worse - I don't work. You'd think that I would have time enough
to do what needs to be done.
To make things worse- I have fallen into a depression (as if you
couldn't already tell by this post) and have no desire to even try.
Yesterday I spent hours just playing computer games....
Thanks for letting me tell you my woes....I feel a little better
already.
Sarah41367
Hello welcome to the board, I was diagnosed with Bi-Polar myself back when I was 15/16... only took meds for a few years... and up until now age 32, I have not been on any medication. I don't know what type Bi-Polar I am suppose to be.
But recently went back to the doctor to ask to be tested for ADHD, and also told my doctor that I didn't think I was Bi-Polar like he first diagnosed.
I will finally see my doctor today on the blood work he run (was also testing for being diabetic and having trouble getting tired during the day).
I use to have moodswings real bad when I was a teenager, usually was stuck in manic mode myself (kind of miss them days) but I do understand you on that part and I also can't afford the meds.
This is my second time trying to convince doc to put me on meds that are affordable, first time was a nightmare, they never did help me (just kept giving free samples of meds which didn't matter cause I could not afford them) same thing now, taking free sample on med that cost too much..
I know I am not happy with my current doctor and starting to realize that I should of looked for someone else a long time ago that had more confidence in this area then what I am dealing with now.
Sorry to hear about the other problem you are having with your back. Have you applied for SSI Disability? I had that some years ago, but they revoked my disability just as soon as I got married!!! Just because DH's made better income then they would allow. Never did get a college education, and the jobs recently have been too stressful.
Oh I wanted to give you another web site, even though it is ADD also, I notice quite a few other Bi-Polars over there and they have information about support groups in your area, plus peer coaching and other coaching information.
http://www.addforums.com/forums/index.php?
Looks like it is down right now, but it is a hugh community over there.
Glad to meet you, nice seeing other Bi-Polars around... I might be Bi-Polar myself, I just could not tell on my own, since the ADDers here seem to match me better, so hard knowing and getting treated for the right thing these days.
First know that you have friends here. Did you look up the national attention deficit site to see where your local one is? I am kinda not the best to give advice today...kind of pot and the kettle...blind leading the blind...but my heart goes out to you and I wanted to let you know you are not alone and I care. I will look for a place in your area and get back to you. In the meantime, take a breath and exhale. You are going to make it. You have already come so far. Do you have a local church you could attend? Some times churches have good people just to talk to. It does help to vent. Write down your feelings everyday even if (you are like me) and lose your journal in the house everyday...write it down. It lets all the bad stress out!!!! It works. You already felt better in your 1st post here. So, take care, write down those feelings. Write down goals and look at them on paper everyday. If you goal is to walk to the mailbox write "walk to the mailbox". Keep that on the top of yoor list till you do it. Dont let anyone tell you what you are doing is wrong or stupid. You are your own best cheerleader!!! I will be back in touch. In the meantime, cyberhugs and prayers that things will go your way today.Boca RatonAdult ADD Group
Leslie Rouder, LCSW
(561) 706-1274
Email: Leslie@ADDadults.net
Web site: http://ADDadults.net
Fort Lauderdale
Gary J. Santucci, Ed.S.
(954) 474-1119
Miami
Terry L. Scheinberg, B.S.
Center of Attention
(305) 661-0373
Sarasota
Overcomers Counseling Center
Shirl McNabb
738 Foggy Morn Ln
Bradenton, FL 34212
I do not know how close these are to you but I thought It would help.
Hi Sarah,
Don't blame yourself. Of course you're depressed! When simple tasks become overwhelming, that can be depressing. You didn't wish this for yourself, it just happened. Dixiepeep has given some great information on where to go. I'd take advantage of it.
Do you have good support from your family? Do they take your illnesses in stride or has everything crashed to a halt because of it?
I find one of the most challenging things about ADHD is lack of family support. You often become the sacrificial lamb, the blame for all the dysfunction that occurs in the family. Only as an adult do you have the power to change that and it's not easy. But if you insist your family helps and supports you, life will be easier. That doesn't mean demanding that they comply with everything you want or say, but it means that they don't criticize you unfairly or ignore you when you need help.
Cheekydeeky
I am in the process of setting up a day runner and it seems to
be helping somewhat. Maybe I will invest in a Palm Pilot later (I
am waiting for my Social Security money to arrive- I was finally
approved!!!! Yeaaa! ) I am also going to get one of those key-
finder doohickies from Brookstone or Sharper Image! I have
needed one of those since I was 16!! Losing my keys is a daily
routine. My kids and husband stop what they are doing and we
all look for them until they are found. ( There is a place where I
am supposed to put them when I get in....but I hardly ever
remember to do it.)
My husband is good about everything. I feel terrible because
he didn't sign up for all of these problems! When I look around
at the mess...almost every thing that is out of place was put
there by me. My kids love me in spite of me. But I know they
wish I could be more like the other moms. Especially my
daughter - her two best friends live in houses that are perfectly
clean and organized and have mom's that have dinner on the
table every night. Further more, my daughter is beginning to
show signs of depression and refuses to consider that she may
have a problem that would require medication. ( I think that she
does not want to think that she is anything like me.)
I know that I am lucky in many ways. It just seems that
sometimes it is hard to appreciate all the good in my life.
Thanks again for listening.
Sarah
I am not sure about a palm pilot, I would just loose that too... need something more with a tracking capability, that I would have to wear 24 / 7 that was if something come missing... I would have little tabs on everything and use the tracker for that one item to locate it.
Have a good day all,
Hi Sarah....below is a link for a support group in your area. Hope this helps. Good luck
CHADD: Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder
I think a Palm Pilot is a wonderful idea. I was thinking of getting one but have not made the financial committment. I have also thougt of getting those key alerts so that I can find my keys. I lose them mostly at home but with three toddlers it can be difficult to find them on a hectic work-day. If I put my watch the same place everyday I will not lose it but if I forget one day then I am back to square one. Routine is everything for me or I am lost.