bump into things? | ADHD Information

You might have been a victim like I was of parents using the police as a threat - much like the boogeyman. "If you don't behave I'll go get the police and they'll take you to jail". I was terrified - and whenever it was a place where my parents said they can see me and take me if I misbehave then I was super good. Like the store. I don't think shoplifting was ever one of my crimes - though my nasty kid sister did often (we found out when she got caught - hehehe).

I know that driving and shopping I have an unrealistic fear of police and am overcautious. Maybe it's like that with you too?

I'm sorry you hate King of Queens. Her accent can drive you batty. But my husband and I laugh about it because their stories are so similar to ours. Kevin James is so like my hubby in looks (only my guy is way cuter and much more charming) and personality. But I don't look anything like her. So, sorry glen, you can't turn your sound off and watch me wiggle....LOL. But, their interactions with each other - holy crap, that is us to a tee. We just sit there and laugh and laugh.

Yeah, Raymond too, both of them would tend to drive anyone to the grave. Get a blanket, Glen. You'll stop shuddering soon.

I think this might be a repeat, but when I'm in a store, I am always paranoid about the clerks thinking that I am stealing something, so i make sure to make it obvious that I am holding a necklace out, for example. I just feel like I look shady looking for some reason.

Have I actually ever STOLEN anything? Just a big 'ole piece of candy when I was little that I got in trouble about and had to apologize for.

I went through a lying phase when I was about 9 years old. But, I have learned (am still LEARNING believe it or not) not to place myself in situations where I might need to lie...just ot be honest with my limitations; which is hard to do AND make a living. My hardest thing is to STILL break bad news to someone when I am dropping the ball in a situation. AUGHHH!!! This is excruciating to me and I want to get over it.

I have mystery scrapes all over me.

I find I have an easier time confronting my husband or parents (the people I love with with all my heart) but I cannot confront people I don't know - say telemarketers, or a store clerk who did me wrong - or people I'm acquainted with at work etc.

I hate confrontation for the most part (who doesn't?), it's not nice really. But I can't even stick up for myself. I'm the gullible one, or will give people the benefit of the doubt or I don't want people to think I'm a b*tch or mean etc.

I just watched King of Queens, and though I think she takes it to the extreme, I somtimes envy the character Carrie. In some ways I wish I could be like her, thick skinned and ok with standing up for myself.

Have your Visual processing checked out by a Therapeutic eye Dr. can be a sign. This exam isn't the same as a wall chart exam. pardon my lack of continuity past member - but whaaaa? [QUOTE=GlenW]

I know that driving and shopping I have an unrealistic fear of police and am overcautious. Maybe it's like that with you too?

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Hmm...don't know why (my parents never threatened that kind of stuff). I think I probably figured out that all I needed to do was *ask* my parents for something and they were generally pretty reasonable. The whole apologizing thing was so humiliating that I think it left a big impact.

I don't really fear the police (yet!)--I pretty much feel that I'm on their side, so it's a bit of a non issue. Though sometimes I feel aware that I don't want anything that I'm doing to be misinterpreted.

This happened the other day (only in reverse). I was driving by the park and I saw a woman open up the trunk of her car (Honda sedan), put a blanket in there, and lift her dog into it. I nearly caused a wreck by whipping my car back around to make sure that she wasn't planning to shut the dog in the trunk. (A woman did that to her child here recently, while she went into a club and was partying.) Turns out the lady was just lifting her dog into the truck while she sat on the bumper to remove her rollerblades. The dog and woman happily drove off with the dog's ears flapping in the wind from the passenger's seat. Anyhow, I'm self-conscioius of sitautions that have a bad appearance like that. Maybe I just hate confrontations, misunderstandings, and such.

I get that too! Although I ended up in the midst of a lot of arguments (usually with me as the subject - "your son's a bad kid - no he's not!") I never liked confrontation. I like to go around fights and not get into them in the first place.

As a young man I was the "sober guy" at parties. I would always be standing between my drunk friend and some behemoth wanting to pound them. I would be trying to make sense to two drunk a**holes - and ended up the poundee more often than not. But hey - that's the life of a diplomat!

We all tend to have that bad habit of being able to hurt the ones we love (who probably don't deserve it) but are so kind to strangers (who need their asses kicked most times). We all do it - it's part of our society sadly.

I find that the meds give me this kind of shield I can almost feel these days. I feel very confident when it's about serving out justice. When I'm online here or out in the real world and I see something wrong happening - I tend to speak up where I would just mumble and maybe phone somebody anonymously like a wuss. No more! I stand up for coworkers (yes I fear for my job but right is right!) , for the elderly, children and women. No - I don't think I'm superman (that's nutty)... more like Batman (he's cool!) LOL

As for the chick on King of Queens - hate the show - but I turn off the sound and watch her wiggle around (I like short italian chicks - sue me!). Now that Everybody loves Raymond - that woman is mean mean MEAN!! I don't like her - she reminds me attitude wise of my ex. *shudder*

I thought I was being funny, sarcastic, and/or empathetic - but I actually
sounded like none of those things.

I have this problem also. I'm out of sync.Add me to the klutzy list. Weird thing is, I was always known as having excellent athletic/balance flexibility abilities. I could dance, but could not remember a routine to save my life. I constantly whack my knee into a file drawer, kick the dog's bowl with my foot, break my baby toe by catching it on my bed frame, or smash my nose by walking into a wall in the middle of the night kind of stuff. This morning, I whacked my ankle bone on a piece of furniture and thought I'd die.

I tend to go overboard in the honesty department because lying comes easy to me also. It's like I need to prove to myself that I won't lie even though I *could."

[QUOTE=bluebird38]Add me to the klutzy list. Weird thing is, I was always known as having excellent athletic/balance flexibility abilities. I could dance, but could not remember a routine to save my life. I constantly whack my knee into a file drawer, kick the dog's bowl with my foot, break my baby toe by catching it on my bed frame, or smash my nose by walking into a wall in the middle of the night kind of stuff. This morning, I whacked my ankle bone on a piece of furniture and thought I'd die.

I tend to go overboard in the honesty department because lying comes easy to me also. It's like I need to prove to myself that I won't lie even though I *could."

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I think the clumsy factor comes in when you are in mundane task mode. When you are dancing - your whole attention is on that ONE task. Make sense? When walking around the house - you're thinking "now where is that cup I put down? What needs to get done? How did they like the job I did? Boy this shirt itches." and on and on. We end up spacing out and WHACK your shin is a lovely blue hue!

Yes - we tend to be overly honest (they call it brutal for a reason) to overcompensate the fact we lie when afraid. It's not a sin - and it gets better once you find good help. A therapist can help teach new ways to cope in both the lies AND the need to disclose things so harshly.

Sorry I keep going to therapy bit guys - but it's a good thing!

Gotta few bruises today.

Awww Valzap! You are way too hard on yourself!

We all have that inner picture of ourself that doesn't come near what we are to others. It's often a shock when we get a chance to hear ourselves in action. That doesn't mean that's what other's hear - I tend to criticize my writing after I've sent it but other's seem to be ok with it - what they say anyway so I defer to their opinion right now.

Recordings can be exceptionally brutal to hear. Noone likes what they sound like or how they come off. That's the old "woulda shoulda couldas" coming out. Don't let it consume you!

Best thing you could do to regain confidence is to take that tape to someone brutally honest but not gunning to zap you. Let them hear it, take a deep breath and let them hit you with their opinion. Take it with you and look at what they say - and ponder it - don't take it as gospel it's all opinion but you may gain from it!

Believe me - George W. doesn't think he comes off as the product of constant cousin-mingling like he does! Someone should force him to see what he looks like - but I hear he doesn't like any TV other than dukes of hazard and Dog: bounty hunter!

Training voiceovers? Wow - thats a cool job!!

Of course I believe that you used the lying as a protection! I'm not judging anyone when I'm here. We all did what we had to to make our life work.

Oh Glen, sorry, I didn't think you were judging me. I just meant that my lying did protect me in some foolish fashion. Somehow it rarely came back to bite me. Thus the reason why I kept doing it.

And yet, I'm a brutally honest person too. Or used to be. I never hesitated in telling my friends what I really thought - but I would always try to be sensitive as well and put it delicately. As I've gotten older though, I kinda just mind my own business because I started to realize maybe I'm not coming across as sensitive as I feel I'm being.

I recorded a conversation between myself and a co-worker (I do corporate training voice-overs for my training docs and left the software on one day) and when I listened to it, I was taken aback at how I sounded. I thought I was being funny, sarcastic, and/or empathetic - but I actually sounded like none of those things.

Now that I'm quick to anger, I just try to stay quiet so I don't open mouth, insert foot.

sounds like a boyfriend my sister would go out.

The lying is nearly gone now - I don't feel the fear of retribution for my thoughts and deeds I used to. That was why I lied - I was scared of everything and felt that lying about it would protect me short-term.

Yes, but you see Glen, the lying would protect me in some fashion. Funny thing is though, I would spend so much time on devising the lie and making it believable - that had I only spent that much time on doing what I needed to do, well then, I wouldn't have had to lie.

Weird Al, huh? Now that puts a pretty picture in my head. UHF, great movie!!

[QUOTE=valzap]Strangely though, I was the good kid in the family. but I used that goodness to fool a lot of people. Lying was my game - and I was (and am still unfortunately) so good at it I deserved an oscar. Knowing that, I know I could never trust the little b$stards and would probably not let them do anything for fear that they were like their mom.

I lie now only to hide my eating habits and/or to give me extra time to do things at work. But who doesn't do that, right?

Pilgrim, I aspire to be Barbie!
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My saving grace was that, although I was evil incarnate I was like Satan's clumsy retarded kid brother. I was TERRIBLE at lying but kept at it! Always got caught lying but would continue to protest even while being beaten to an inch.

If I had been good at lying I'd be chatting with you all from behind the walls of some maximum security prison - waiting in fear for my boyfriend to get back from making license plates. Ooh - I shudder to think.

[QUOTE=valzap]I could impersonate Bill the cat's freaky eyes. I would sit there in S.S class with that expression. MY teacher used to stop to ask me if I had anything in my eyes. [/QUOTE]

There was a guy I remember in high school who unintentionally looked like Bill - and coincidentally several other bloom county mutants! He was a local loser drug dealer - we called him "johnny sunshine" though I never asked why. He had not much hair (tufts coming out the top), a blown pupil from drugs and his tongue would stick out a bit during his trips. He was both funny and very creepy to look at. ACK! Even had the whiskers to a point.

Me - I was told I kind of looked like "wierd Al Yankovic" - even after high school. It was probably my lack of personal grooming - my hair was wild and my moustache at the time was kind of Gene Shalit-y. Boy I don't miss those things!

valzap--I'm glad you don't---i truly feel sorry for people who are sucked into this mind game of having to look a certain way and buy the latest fashion of clothes, yikes. There used to be a woman's clothes store here called "The Fashion Conspiracy" and that's really what it is ! ACK ! is right..

Of course I believe that you used the lying as a protection! I'm not judging anyone when I'm here. We all did what we had to to make our life work.

They say that a lazy person works twice as hard as everyone else - only just on getting out of work. I look back and see where I did that all the time - but no more regrets here.

I often use my laziness as a tool at work when talking to people about ways to simplify work or work safely. I tell them I'm a lazy guy and that I find the ways to work that use the least energy. When they look at it like I do - I get them to attempt my work ways so as to avoid exerting more than necessary. It also gets them to work ergonomically - and I get to train them with the least effort.

Win-win!! I love when that happens!

Everybody lies - not just us. I stopped lying to myself first - and the rest fell into place. I rarely feel the need to lie now. I don't fear hardly anything anymore. It's wierd but I'm kind of fearless I guess. "Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose" is how it goes. I feel very free this last year and it all makes sense to me now. Its great - but not for everyone I think.

Yeah wierd Al. I loved UHF too - seen it a few times.

"Badgers? We don't need no steenkeeng badgers!"

I am a lifetime klutz! As a child it was cracks in the sidewalk, my own shadow - you name it I fell on or otherwise damaged myself on anything in my vicinity.

Not only that - but my clumsiness led to my constant doctor visits as a young child as I tried to get homicidal on my brat of a younger sister and would inevitably stab or otherwise damage myself. Once I was brought to boiling my lil' sis teasing me (and parents of course telling me to ignore it - but not stopping it), I tried to use the pen I had to stab her. I know - bad Glen but I was 5 and still feel somewhat justified. Well, I held the pen the wrong way - and bringing it up to ventilate my sister I put the sharp end into my eye - just below the eyeball. One milimeter up and I'd be typing in 2d! It happened often- my MD's visits were always ending up in multiple stitches around my face.

As I grew older I never broke a bone but was constantly a body-bruise. My mother still tells me that she feared being accused of abuse because of my constant self-damage.

Now that I'm medicated I notice I actually LOOK at my surroundings. I have been able to avoid major damage - with only the occasional bump on my head when I leave my own cupboards open at eye level (I'm 6'2" - that all by itself is an accident waiting to happen).

I find the meds leave me far less uncoordinated and clumsy. But I still look back at the previous 37 years of it and laugh.

My 15 y/o daughter is quite a clutz...maybe I should have her take an on line ADhD test. She has other symps also, but it just might be teen-ageness..

Isn't Toepaine in south east Asia....

I wouldn't worry too much pilgrim. It's a part of life to be clumsy at 15. The body is growing too fast for the poor brain and it happens to them all. It's when they can't seem to avoid major injury to not just shins and elbows but to head and torso too. Good test if it's ADHD is to put her in an empty room with one box in the corner - ask her to walk from one end to another and if she still hits the box it could be ADHD! LOL

Do you find that you constantly bump into things - desks, chairs, walls, doors etc. or do you trip over your own two feet?

I have always done this and will sometimes go thru phases where it happens all the time and then not so much. I thought it had to do with my gradual weight gain over the last few years - I wasn't sure how to navigate my big butt around a corner.

I use a GPS to navigate around my house...found that it works out preety good...

There are no problems...just solutions

unless you keep bumping your little toe and then it becomes a big problem!!!

i know, i'm constantly in toe pain

I can look like I've been in a battle, just by cleaning the house.

I bump into things, trip over my feet, and tip things over.

Oh hell Valzap!! Your condition would make you a GREAT parent!!

I only wish I could have kids - now that my meds work I have insight into the minds of the little criminals! Even when I was unmedicated I could tell when there was mischief afoot with my ex's little darlings. They could get away with nothing - and was a constant problem between me, them and the ex. She felt I was overbearing and controlling. I showed her my scars and would say "this is what their actions lead to - get the point?". Eventually though the kids convinced her I was a horrible guy and she told me to back off so I did. They have survived so I guess that's ok - but I know I did ok.

If I was to be able to father kids today I would be more even-handed - but they could never be as evil a little menace as I was. It's kind of cool - some parents I visit think I'm psychic as I mention what the kid is thinking when I see them working on a dastardly evil plan. Makes me chuckle.

But the best parents I think have gone through the fire. You will find when the kids are your own business that you find the patience and love to make it. Not everyone is suited to be a parent - but ya never know!

I love Bizarro! I get it - which makes me wonder if it's only funny to those of us who are mental?? I get bloom county, doonsberry, etc.. but don't get family circus. What's with that one anyway? Do any of you get it?

I tend to relate to the odd ones. I miss bloom county so much - I used to clip the paper comics of it during high school since I couldnt' afford the damn books. Even had a "bill the cat" doll on my dresser. His face would comfort me as I went to sleep. It was cool to creep everyone out with him too - big extra for me.

ACK!!!

Strangely though, I was the good kid in the family. but I used that goodness to fool a lot of people. Lying was my game - and I was (and am still unfortunately) so good at it I deserved an oscar. Knowing that, I know I could never trust the little b$stards and would probably not let them do anything for fear that they were like their mom.

I lie now only to hide my eating habits and/or to give me extra time to do things at work. But who doesn't do that, right?

Pilgrim, I aspire to be Barbie!

I could impersonate Bill the cat's freaky eyes. I would sit there in S.S class with that expression. MY teacher used to stop to ask me if I had anything in my eyes. Maybe FLOATERS!!!!

Ah Valzap! My younger sis was born when I was 3. It was all downhill from there. I put the timeline on here ages ago but I'm sure it's all but forgotten. It is a sordid tale and she still doesn't talk to me - the butthead.

age 5 - 3 stiches below eye (stabbed self with pen)

age 6 - 5 stitches hairline (she threw roofing tile at me)

3 stiches eyebrow line (hit over head with plastic bowling pin)

2 stitches below other eye (raised chair to hit her - hit myself)

age 7 - sister got 12 stitches on top of head - had to be shaved bald (threw cat at her and it landed on top of head - who knew?)

- laceration in forehead - neighbor girl protecting sis from homicidal bro threw rock at me - got lucky shot. Bled buckets.

- 9 stitches in left thigh - fell running through tree stumps got cyst that needed to be removed in surgery. Still can't feel leg.

Countless bruises, unidentified scars, scalded, wasps' nest disturbed by foot going into underground hole, etc. etc. I've had peniciliin where I sit more often than any kid should have to.

Ok Glen, you have to stop it now. I am at work for crying out loud (ignoring it as usual because really, I can't remember what I'm supposed to do!) I can't be laughing out loud like a little school girl.

I am glad I wasn't your mother. I probably would've put a leash on you so I could keep you in my sight at all times.

I have often gone in to pull out the roaster pan out of the oven without oven mitts.

Stove was on by the way.

LTC1 - I can totally relate. God forbid I actually treat myself to a manicure and get nail tips put on. That throws my whole balance off. I am constantly slamming my fingers into things!
Pilgrim, I blame gravity on my weight!

ROFL - Valzap!

I laugh now too.

I told my therapist how my mother was constantly under pressure by me doing this stuff and that I was getting beat on by her out of desperation and not having a clue how to handle lil' ol ADHD me. He was shocked and tried to tell me how sorry he was that I was abused. Abused?? I told him he had it wrong! I totally understand her now that I'm on meds. Had it been me I would have snuck into my room and used a pillow!

I understand now my mother's total frustration with me and admire her restraint. Every whack I got was deserved and she stood by me through way more than most parents ever would. I don't know how I never ended up for adoption or a small unmarked grave. I love the woman - and told her how I understand when I started my meds. We are very close now - and I'm working on my dad now.

glenw, thus the reason I won't have kids - some may disagree with me here - but I have no patience for 'em. that's why I stopped teaching. I could handle the "normal" kids, but the little hyperactive boys who were on meds were my worst nightmare. They ruined me.

Now with me having my own add problems, my lord I don't think I could restrain myself if I had an adhd boy - not with my low frustration at this point. I sometimes think though that if I can get a handle on this, maybe I will change my mind.

But, I don't mean to get off topic....

Valzap...that is funnY...lets all live on the Moon

Speaking of funnY:::carton:Bizzarro by Dan Piraro in todays paper:"fashion tips form Barbie"...picture of a Barbie Doll>>>Non-opening mouth aids in weight control>>>Hair should be widest part of body>>>Legs look longer if you never bend your knees>>>Neck should be no wider than your windpipe>>>Keep internal organs away from waist.

I personally like to blame gravity for most of my mis-steps

I was the class clown

...what a surprise ! HS was not my favorite stage of life to say the least [or most]Ah, glen, your story cracks me up.

I often had a lot of rage against my older sister but either she managed to scar me (you should see my hands, even today - little remembrances of sibling abuse) or every now and then I managed to get back at her. I never hurt myself though. Ouch!

I always think I'm looking at my surroundings but just can't get myself out of the way fast enough. I've done quite a few nose dives right in front of my students during my teaching days. At least they always had a laugh.

I am always bruised but never broke anything. I managed 35 years w/out a broken bone until last Thanksgiving when I broke my little toe. I blame my husband on that one though, and he blames me. We'll never know the true story!

I'm afraid she might actully hit it ! ...and then she'd say she didn't see it...

Yer probaly right Glen...these kids nowadays...What's up with them, next thing ya know they'll be wanting to get a drivers license

LOL Pilgrim! Yes she most likely would hit it then say she didn't. I remember those days well and grimace only a little.

I just hope your precious daughter isn't where I was at 15. I was a late bloomer - I was still 5 foot 4 inches at 15 and had size 12EEE shoes! Felt like a short bozo the clown. My feet would trip me every day and I was a constant supply of humor to my high school. I went from 5'4" to 6'2" in one summer at 17. Pain like the friggin incredible hulk on a bad day. Still feel the joint pain I had.

At least now with councilling I can look back and laugh (a little) at the state I was in. At least my shoes are only a small 13/large 12 so I didn't keep going. It's hard enough to find shoes my size as it is!