Bathroom / Bedroom Question

i have two that i have the bed and bath problem,,,so i have started a credit chart,,,,they want to beat each other on it,,,,hope it works for awhile,,,each credit is a penny,,,i give five for bed and five for bathroom,,,this goes on for a month at the end of the month they get to go to the store,,,and buy with their credits,,,of course i teas them that they r making me broke,,,for some reason they like that,,,lol,,,,,but that is ok with me,,,,but,,,,take them shopping at different times,,,if someone makes more,,,,or everyone will hear them,,,clear to china,,,if you know what i mean

[QUOTE=unconditionaluv]We, here in New Mexico, are taught to try to conserve water by not flushing...if it is brown make it go down, if it is yellow stay mellow[/QUOTE]

That is very funny and gross.  I could never do that.  Yuk...who wants to look and smell someone elses pee???  But I do admit that slogan is pretty funny. Doesn't it make it hard to clean the toliet after pee is sitting for some time?  I really feel sorry for you but ya gotta do what ya gotta do.

My 14 yr old is the same way. There are 4 of us sharing 1 bathroom and she never has the courtsey to clean up after she has been in there. Her bedroom is a complete disaster area. I havent seen the floor in about a month. I decided to not clean up her room anymore because I was sick of doing it. I know that children w/ adhd are not organized in anyway whatsoever but she cant complete one task without starting another.

Recently, "A", has become very violent. I tried to have her admitted two weeks ago through the emergeny room because she went into this rage that she could not get herself out of, she came after me and my husband. After 2 hrs of her tearing our house apart, and 2 hrs at the emergency room, the DR's released her because she was not a danger to herself, yet I had bruises and scratch marks all over me.

Lostmind-  I am so sorry about your daughter becoming violent and that the doctors didn't seem to help. I prayed for her and your family. My daughter has had some raging episodes, but not to where she got physical. Plus this was before medication. Hang in there. I don't know what your spiritual beliefs are, but I am a Christian and I know that without my faith in God and the strength I receive through a relationship with Jesus Christ, I wouldn't make it!

God bless.

My 14 yr old is the same way. There are 4 of us sharing 1 bathroom and she never has the courtsey to clean up after she has been in there. Her bedroom is a complete disaster area. I havent seen the floor in about a month. I decided to not clean up her room anymore because I was sick of doing it. I know that children w/ adhd are not organized in anyway whatsoever but she cant complete one task without starting another.

Recently, "A", has become very violent. I tried to have her admitted two weeks ago through the emergeny room because she went into this rage that she could not get herself out of, she came after me and my husband. After 2 hrs of her tearing our house apart, and 2 hrs at the emergency room, the DR's released her because she was not a danger to herself, yet I had bruises and scratch marks all over me.

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Are you certain your DD has ADHD. I would highly reccomend another evaluation by a neuropsych. Rages are not typical of ADHD at all.

Unfortunately Yes. The problem is the Therapist and Physc. dont know why she is raging. She never smiles, she is never happy, she is always down, has an attitude the the world owes her everything, she has no sympathy for anyone, she doesnt care what the consequences are for her actions. The docs keep trying to say it has to do with her Menstrual cycle, but the rages are never before or after it.

It has gotton real bad over the past few weeks and it doent look like the end is anywhere close. She she see her Physc. 2x a month for a med check, her therapist 2x a week, goes to an after school group therapy program 3x a week. Right now I am at my wits end, I have considered her going to live with her birth father, unfortuately he is not the nicest guy either.

Since it is her own private bathroom, I would just shut the door, put a deodorizer thingy in the hallway and let her live with it for a while. Put a large message on the wall opposite the toilet that says "Flush the toilet or lose the bathroom". Once she sees that you aren't going to clean it for her, she will at least start flushing. You can up the ante by not allowing her to use any other bathroom in the house and telling her that her friends have to use her br also. They would embarrass her into cleaning or at least flushing.

If that didn't work, clean it, put a lock on the door and tell her that she can't have her own br until she is responsible enough to take care of it.

13 is certainly old enough to flush the toilet. It should have become a habit long before now.  That would be where I would draw the line.

Lostmind,

I would get a second opinion, ASAP!  I agree with Stepmom that your daughter may not have ADHD or may have a disorder in conjunction with ADHD.  What meds is she on?  Do the meds make her rages worse?  I would encourage you to have her evaluated by a good child psychiatrist to rule in or out bipolar disorder.  I would also take her to a neuropsychologist to evaluate her for other childhood disorders.  ADHD-like symptoms can accompnay many childhood disorders.  You owe to yourself and to your daughter to find out what's going on.

Lostmind:

Here is a link to info on this site that may be helpful:

http://www.adhdnews.com/bipolar.htm

Hi, I have a 14 yr old daughter, diagnosed at 13. She has her own bathroom. What's driving me crazy is that she often doesn't flush the toilet and when she brushes her teeth she spits on the mirror and faucet. Along with towel and trash on the floor, makeup and other stuff not put away. Her room is the same way. I know organization and neatness are not traits of those with adhd, but i do think she should be able to remember to flush the toilet and not spit all over the place when brushing her teeth. I have put notes on her mirror to remind her. No change. Should I take a priviledge away if she doesn't at least flush the toilet and spit into the sink? I don't expect her to be tidy. I know she's a teenager, but I think these 2 requests are not asking for too much! I also want her to make her bed each day. This rarely gets done. Any ideas or comments?  Thanks.