Can you articulate? | ADHD Information
[QUOTE=seeker63]i once told a friend the dinner she had cooked for me was 'just awful', when i intended to say it was 'awesome', and i was really 'full'.[/QUOTE]
I used to do that all the time and still do occasionally, especially when I am under stress.
I will also find myself agreeing with someone about something when I totally disagree. It's like my mouth and brain don't have even a faint acquaintance with each other.
its word processing memory...
your working memory is failing you... typical adhd issue..
how to fix it?? many claims but nothing substantive.. maybe crawling may help...
Valzap...absolutely!! Everything you mention fits me to a 'T'!In fact, in reply to ALL of the above posts:
Ditto!
Yes!!!!!
And it does seem to get worse as I get older, not better! GypsyWomyn38643.8790740741[QUOTE=seeker63]
i once told a friend the dinner she had cooked for me was 'just awful', when i intended to say it was 'awesome', and i was really 'full'.
[/QUOTE]
This made me LOL. Yes, that is exactly what I mean and what I do. That is another example of my inarticulation. I often feel that my maturity level was very advance when I was growing up - I could always communicate easily with adults as a teen. But over the last 10 years or so, I feel that I reached that limit back then and now I'm regressing and have to learn how to speak all over again!
you said it woman!
i sure don't seem to trip on my tongue when i'm on my way to offending somebody!
I have the same problem. I am very articulate when it comes to writing. If I have a prepared speech, I do ok.
When I teach (4th grade) I find myself not saying the right words, stumbling over words, giving instructions that leave words out. It is frustrating, but 4th graders are very forgiving. 
i once told a friend the dinner she had cooked for me was 'just awful', when i intended to say it was 'awesome', and i was really 'full'.[/QUOTE]
That's hysterical! We're you eating parrots and Keys?I have recently been diagnosed. I didn't have the H in ADHD growing up. I was painfully shy and have always found it hard to get close to people. I have a girlfriend, and everything is cool there, but i mean just friends. Has anyone else had this kind of problem, or is that not an ADHD thing?[QUOTE=Brookelea]
its word processing memory...
your working memory is failing you... typical adhd issue..
how to fix it?? many claims but nothing substantive.. maybe crawling may help...
[/QUOTE]
I want drugs, man, drugs!! That way I can become addicted and go and kill someone! oops, no just joking. I am hoping meds will calm me down enough that my mouth can catch up to my brain. DR's next week! crossed fingers.
ah drugs won't improve working memory speed though... might slow down your mind and thoughts and therefore articulate better..but not to the capacity that it should be at...
I think that it was in articulation that I first noted that something might not
be right with me. I lost the ability to pronounce words that heretofore I had
been able to do so. Then my vocabulary began to shrink and dwindle as I
lost the use of several words. Then the ability to read . . . as my memory
seemed to stop working. Only in the short term or near term, my long term
memory has seemed to hold up, as best I can tell.
In the IQ test they gave me I was ashamed to reveal that I could not hold the
numbers in my head to make change from in a fast food example. I put
them up to use . . . and they just went away. LOL, well it looks as if fast food
is not in my future, as a job at least. Articulation and memory seem to go
hand in hand, at least in the version of ADD I have. Oh I hated it when I used to get into arguments with my ex girlfriend. I used to ask her to please give me the night to think things over in my head clearly so I can articulate my thoughts and Ideas properly -She of course insisted on the 'Right Here, Right Now' ploy. I felt like so much at a disadvantage.[QUOTE=valzap]I find that I mess up my words all the time when I speak. Do you? It's like I am seriously mentally blocked or something. I don't make any sense when I talk, though I know what I want to say (usually) but can't get the words right.
Either the words aren't the ones I want to speak, ie: "I believe a temp person for to do creating" when I really wanted to say " I believe we should hire another person who can come in and design all the self paced classes on our new software"
I repeat the same thing: "we should get a new temp, we should really get a new temp"
And/or totally mess up the words. "We should ket a new stemp - BLAH, we should get a new temp" I actually say Blah or something like it to stop my speaking and start from scratch.
Anyone else do this? I find this really sucks for me, because
my full-time job is as a Corporate trainer, so I'm publicly speaking
all the time. It's becoming frustrating![/QUOTE]
Who, me? Right away? Never. It's all ways in tent tional.
But!!!
I do hear that way. Here's
what I really heard from my swife who was berating me today: So this is
hot off the press. That's not what she said. That was said for
rhetorical emphasis. Here's what I heard her say:
"You don't even pee in the
toilet!" So I said, see, there you go again. What in the world did you
mean by that? You're just being mean (b/c as all boys, sometimes 'it'
bounces, and sprinkles a little nitrogen around. So I think, oh, it's
about squeezing the toothpaste again. So I say to her "WHAT!" And she
repeated her self. The second time I heard different.Here's what she really said:"Your dignity is in the toilet!"
Now, I asked myself, "Self,
why was there such a huge gap in understanding?" And my elf responded,
'b/c you jump to conclusions. Why in the world would she be talking a/b
toilets anyway, ifn' it's not pee you put in them?'
I was so marvelated at the
difference btw the broadcast and the reception, I never responded to
it. I started talking a/b the need for communicative communication, and
lost her train of thought, and we ended up hanging up.At least I caught a glimpse of a misunderstanding. And she did, too.
BTW, in a serious note here, does any body have any idea what she meant by that statement?
[QUOTE=Brookelea]its word processing memory...
your working memory is failing you... typical adhd issue..
how to fix it?? many claims but nothing substantive.. maybe crawling may help...
[/QUOTE]I tried that. It just went to her head.
Hmm. I am told that I am frustrating because I am *better* at arguing -- that is, I have the verbal skills that allow me to "win." What I lack is the emotional intelligence to shut up, concede, drop the subject, or otherwise back off. The ability to explain and articulate is way overrated, especially with regard to conflict resolution. Have to show my DD this. I am always saying the wrong words. Get my sentences backwards, like I engaged the announcement of my daughter at church. I might be talking about a book and put in the word necklace. I am teased about this all the time. Typing /writing is easier that talking to me. Soy in answer to your question. Yes.
I find that I mess up my words all the time when I speak. Do you? It's like I am seriously mentally blocked or something. I don't make any sense when I talk, though I know what I want to say (usually) but can't get the words right.
Either the words aren't the ones I want to speak, ie: "I believe a temp person for to do creating" when I really wanted to say " I believe we should hire another person who can come in and design all the self paced classes on our new software"
I repeat the same thing: "we should get a new temp, we should really get a new temp"
And/or totally mess up the words. "We should ket a new stemp - BLAH, we should get a new temp" I actually say Blah or something like it to stop my speaking and start from scratch.
Anyone else do this? I find this really sucks for me, because my full-time job is as a Corporate trainer, so I'm publicly speaking all the time. It's becoming frustrating!
yup verbal dyslexia. I prefer to write because I can vomit up thoughts and then arrange and edit them for clarity.I sometimes wonder (or wander as they say in texas -- kinda fits ADD dontcha think?) if our minds go so fast that our mouths just cant keep up?
that's how I feel about it anyway
yep, I mooosh up my words quite often.. I just laugh it off, make some stupid remark about how mind isnt engaged with mouth and go on.....
One definitley has to have a sense of humor to live with ADD
Sherry
yep!
i prefer to write also. it gives me a chance to edit, and sort out the ideas so they are more likely to be understood by others.
mix up words all the time.
sometimes the words have similar structures, but entirely different meanings. sometimes it's the verbal dyslexia. sometimes, i jam words together.
i once told a friend the dinner she had cooked for me was 'just awful', when i intended to say it was 'awesome', and i was really 'full'.
Same here. It frustrates me because I feel like I come off as a complete idiot.I'm able to express myself way, way better writing than talking. Many times I just can't find the right word when I'm speaking. I'll even ask the listener, "whats that word?" It's so frustrating! Sometimes I think this causes some people, who don't know me very well, to think I'm not so bright. 
At other times though, if these people are around me more, they see my sparks of brilliant ideas and knowledge. Then they are astounded 
Dignity in the toilet - it's out of context so it would be too hard to determine.
i also find because of this verbal communication problem, that I am rambling a lot more in an effort to find the point that I am trying to make. Again, as a corporate trainer, that is not good. Everybody likes a public speaker who seems down to earth and relatable - and I am because of those missteps in communication and I laugh at myself. But, lately, I'm just plain hard to follow.
My co-worker is just like me too. So, now I don't know if I'm tuning her out or become abrupt because I am truly losing focus on what she is saying or if it is my inattentiveness that is causing it. So, now I feel like I am just plain rude.
bepatient, its so frustrating when ppl think that we are moronic!!sometimes i do that in class - when teaching english!! i forget the word
teenage dirtbags just laugh!!
In reply to the original post,
All the time
[QUOTE=Bretman]I have recently been diagnosed. I didn't have the H in ADHD growing up. I was painfully shy and have always found it hard to get close to people. I have a girlfriend, and everything is cool there, but i mean just friends. Has anyone else had this kind of problem, or is that not an ADHD thing?[/QUOTE]
Seems you got lost in the wave. These guys normally jump at the opportunity to support new guys like you - they just got swept forward. Don't let it discourage you here ok?
Perfectly normal to have trouble finding friends when you have ADHD - even harder to keep them afterwards.
The H - if you took a survey from what I've seen this last year here you'd find most of us are the inattentive type - which is most likely you too.
You have a girlfriend - excellent and congrats!! That's often hard too - I had an LTR of 13 years that was always me screwing up and getting kicked to the curb, her taking me back when my ADHD was less obvious, then repeat over and over until fully cooked. Put on backburner to simmer. Serves one.
Oops got my story mixed up with my world class chili recipe there - sorry.
There's a thread around here about making friends and how hard it is for us. try and find it - and look around if you have questions chances are someone already asked it. If not - go ahead and ask away!!
We are all different people sailing in the same style boats. We go our own ways but the ride is mostly the same so you'll find friends here just like you. That's not so bad as it sounds either LOL.
Once you get to the stage where you are either taking meds or therapy or both - you will find that it gets easier. You'll learn new skills and talking to new people becomes easier and less clumsy. It's really a good life once you get ADHD to leave you alone!!
Good luck - and keep us posted!! Feel free to ask me anything you'd like to know.