How do you handle....
You'll grow a very thick skin....trust me.....Ever since Kindergarden, I've always run into several parents who say "oh..so you're Tommys mom" .......we've heard alot about him" when they meet me. They always try to make it sound so innocent and cute, but it's still kinda rude.
How do you handle being "that mom" (or parent) of "that kid"? I was at a Tastefully Simple party tonight and another woman there looked vaguely familiar. She introduced herself and said her daughter was in my son's class at pre-school. In the course of conversation, it was brought up that my son has been diagnosed with ADHD and this woman says "Oh! My daughter says that Matthew is 'angry.'" I wanted to burst out in tears right there. I kind of questioned her b/c our son is usually not angry -- just hyper and has a problem making transitions from one activity to another. She said "well, my daughter uses that word to describe everything -- she doesn't really have the vocabulary to describe much."
I pretty much wanted to leave right then and come home and cry. She was in no way unkind -- she just doesn't understand how it feels to be "that parent." How do you handle those feelings?
[QUOTE=Tryan920]You'll grow a very thick skin....trust me.....Ever since Kindergarden, I've always run into several parents who say "oh..so you're Tommys mom" .......we've heard alot about him" when they meet me. They always try to make it sound so innocent and cute, but it's still kinda rude.
[/QUOTE]
I agree completely!! And NOW I can answer, proudly, "Yes, I am his mother!"
It took time though.
Now I just tell them to kiss my lilly white ass! 
Agree with having a tough skin. A child is not really equipped to deal with how another child presents. If he has trouble with transitioning though, I'd see a NeuroPsych to check to High Functioining Autism. Those kids can get very frustrated, even angry, because of their differences, and there is so much help. If it turns out to only be ADHD, you haven't hurt anything. After what I've been through, my motto is: "Leave no stone unturned. Better to be safe than sorry." Good luck and don't let other parents get you down. Dry those tears. She didn't mean to hurt you and you are doing all you can to help your child and your child knows it.When people start saying things that are negative about my son, I start saying things that are positive about him. I make sure they know that I am proud of him for who he is and what he can do. That usually shuts them up.I too hate hearing Oh you are Andrew's Mom...... But then there are times that the other parents that spend time in the class room say that he is such a great kid and I think that they have my son confused with another. I can not imagine how he is well behaved at school becuase we rarely see good behavior from him.
Thanks for the replies. Her comment actually shocked me a little -- not because I think he is an angel, but b/c "angry" is not typical of his behavior. In fact, instead of hitting he usually hugs -- so much so that we have had to teach him to ask before he hugs other people.
I think it may be a long road ahead for me (as well as him) in the tough skin department! It most likely has to do with MY issues surrounding being "Mommy" and having others thinking that his issues are because of our parenting. However, I know I'm going to have to get over that for his sake and mine!
It's good to know there is a place I can post where others have had the same experience! Thanks! 
Meg,
Develop a sense of humor and be able to joke about it. That has saved my sanity and I think teachers (mostly) appreciate it. I'd answer: Yeah, that's me. You know, it's never boring at our house." I have also made jokes that if someone ever kidnapped (God forbid!) Patrick that the kidnapper would find us and give Pat back. Sometimes laughing makes the hurt go away, sometimes it just makes it hurt less.
Whenever Jordan is together with a few kids and something happens, ie someone gets hurt or something gets broke, I always feel like its Jordan's fault. Uh oh, now what did he do!!! I hate feeling like that. Its not always his fault but I can't shake that feeling. Do ya'll know what I mean??
One day, when I was on a field trip with Jordan's class, a mother heard me say his name. She came up to me and said "Oh, so you're Jordan's mom!!". I was getting in defensive mode, when she said "My daughter told me she's going to marry Jordan." whew!!!!!!!!!
Barb, I like your idea about speaking positively about your son when others are negative. I'm going to do that too!! I'm going to proudly be his mother!!
[QUOTE=MegMaguire]How do you handle being "that mom" (or parent) of "that kid"? I was at a Tastefully Simple party tonight and another woman there looked vaguely familiar. She introduced herself and said her daughter was in my son's class at pre-school. In the course of conversation, it was brought up that my son has been diagnosed with ADHD and this woman says "Oh! My daughter says that Matthew is 'angry.'" I wanted to burst out in tears right there. I kind of questioned her b/c our son is usually not angry -- just hyper and has a problem making transitions from one activity to another. She said "well, my daughter uses that word to describe everything -- she doesn't really have the vocabulary to describe much."
I pretty much wanted to leave right then and come home and cry. She was in no way unkind -- she just doesn't understand how it feels to be "that parent." How do you handle those feelings?
[/QUOTE]
Can't change what happened now but it would have been great if you could have said, "Oh, that is such a shame your daughter has a limited vocabulary".
[QUOTE=Auntie]Can't change what happened now but it would have been great if you could have said, "Oh, that is such a shame your daughter has a limited vocabulary".[/QUOTE]
Touch`e 
oh auntie, you are such a cat!!!!
develop a thick skin...this woman will have her fair share of comments too when her daughter hits her teenage years...
what goes around comes around...
The person who said grow thick skin is what you have to do. As for the women at the party she will NEVER understand unless someone close to her was diagnosed.
Good one Auntie!OM Gosh. My husband and I have said this several times. We don't have to worry about anyone kidnapping L, because they would bring him right back. lol. I use a lot of humor to deal with it.
[QUOTE=susieb]
Meg,
Develop a sense of humor and be able to joke about it. That has saved my sanity and I think teachers (mostly) appreciate it. I'd answer: Yeah, that's me. You know, it's never boring at our house." I have also made jokes that if someone ever kidnapped (God forbid!) Patrick that the kidnapper would find us and give Pat back. Sometimes laughing makes the hurt go away, sometimes it just makes it hurt less.
[/QUOTE] Yes I know how you feel too. Last year I went to a pampered chef party and ran into a lady (we knew each other from other school events) who's dd was in my son's class and she pretty much ignored me like she didn't know who I was. Usually people will be really friendly when the kids have class together. It will take along time for me to grow that skin too.Quick way to get people curious about our kids, next time say "yes, he's an Indigo child", have you read the book ? Gets them curious without you feeling like your skin has been once agan ripped off by another comment.
Enter Your Email below to claim your Free Book