Although my 15 year old son has been diagnosed w/adhd. I know that it is more than that. He is currently been treated with lithium for his mood and aggression. he is always on edge. We never know when he is going to "snap". I am a single mom with another 12 yo son. We have been verbally and physically abuse. Home life is never stable. I am at the end of my rope..and feeling quite hopeless and defeated as is my 12 yo who has suffered a lot as well. Any words of encouragemen that your could offer would be greatly appreciated. I am feeling more and more isolated as there seems to be no one in my circle that can remotely relate to what I am going through.
Welcome! I hope you find the information and support you are looking for.
Many of us come to this board because none of our friends truly understands what we go through. There are several of us on this board who are facing similar situations to yours. My 12-year-old son was dx with ADHD and anxiety almost 3 years ago. He was recently prescibed Zoloft for anxiety, had a rage reaction and now his doc believes he has a mood disorder. We are just starting meds for that. My 10-year-old daughter had a manic reaction to Paxil, prescribed for depression last spring, and is now on Depakote for mood stabilization. She is doing much better.
I hope you are seeing a good child psychiatrist who has experience with kids who have mood disorders. The right meds are so important to gaining stability. Is Lithium working at all? Is your son at a therapeutic dose? It can take a while to get just the right combination of meds.
Again, welcome! You are not alone.
SmallMom38670.2846527778mom22..i'm in the same situation as you as a single mother raising children alone all with add/adhd.My 12 year old is very abusive and physically, his younger brother and i have been through alot with him. In my case one day he attacked me because i wouldn't let him go to a friends house in an area of town that i concider unacceptable. I called the police department in town and had him charged with assault against me ..He was put on probation and had to report to a JPO once a week to be accountable for his actions..I already was participating in counceling when all this had happened..After all the drama of court and probation he is no longer pysically abusive he will resort to old behavior with verbal abuse but I am able to not worry if he will flip out when i take away a priviledge..ex-phone,playstation,rides to activities..I hope you find something that works..In my home regardless of adhd/add they are responsible for their behavior and will suffer the consiquences. Counceling and behavior management along with the right medication can make a world of difference..Hang in their,one last note i have had my youngest son in therapy to help deal with the stress that his older brother had inflicted in the home. Through that he has found his own voice in sticking up for himself when their is a issue between them.Carolyn that was good of you to show him you will not tolerate such behavior and I think it was good he had to own up to his behavior as well. A good teaching tool but you both need a hug anyways for I am sure it was not easy.Well, it really sounds like you are dealing with a mood disorder. Lithium is a mood stabilizer and often used for those with bipolar. If in fact your older son has a mood disorder there is a good chance that your younger one could also. I would mention it to your psychiatrist and see if he/she could help you with both boys and maybe you could also have some private sessions of your own(if you don't already) to help work through some of your stress and feelings of working with your boys. My son's current diagnosis(which seems to change often) is bipolar/ADHD. There is a great website that I would recommend going to. It is www.bpkids.org. It is fabulous, they have a lot of good info, message boards and chat(usually around 6pm pacific) There is a fee to join the site, but you can get a free waiver if you request one and they do not verify your income. I wish you the best. 
I have bipolar and if he's on LIthium, the doctor thinks he has some form of bipolar. I have a site for you to read about Juvenile Onset Bipolar. That would mean that ADHD is not his main problem. 90% of the kids with early onset bipolar also meet the criteria for ADHD, but the cause is childhood mania, which makes some ADHD look very mild. Is your son on a therapeutic dose of Lithium? Does he have frequent blood draws? Is his level around 1.0? Too low a dose won't help him; too high a dose (1.6) can cause side effects (this happened to me on Lithium--must be monitored carefully). Have you read "The Bipolar Child" by Dimitri and Janice Papolous? It's a keeper! I have the site for you now:
www.bpchildresearch.org
