FAMILY MATTERS | ADHD Information
DoctorQ I do believe you are spot on!! That sounds very familiar to me.
Funny thing is I'm a much happier person than those "outsiders" as you so apty called them
While I was growing up, and through my adulthood, my family
- completely failed to notice
- attributed my ADD traits to "character flaws"
- no longer listens and doesn't care.
Family, friends, co-workers, even psychology professionals: ONLY THOSE WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER CAN TRULY AND HONESTLY UNDERSTAND IT.
The best you can hope for from 'outsiders,' even family, is compassion. But most often, you're asking the 'outsider' to go quite a distance to believe in you enough to be compassionate, because from the outside looking in, an ADD adult appears self-involved and irresponsible. There is no real visible marker to the observer that is otherwise.
And often, there is nothing more judgmental on this earth than one's family.
http://www.adhdnews.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=9309&K W=rayray812
preaching to the choir
WONT TELL MY PARENTS, BUT DOCS TOLD THEM WHEN I WAS A KID THEY REJECTED IT.
SECRETLY MEDICATING FOR LAST YEAR AND ALL THEY SAY IS GLAD YOU GREW UP SON.
A SECRET ILL TAKE TO THE GRAVE.
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Family, friends, co-workers, even psychology professionals: ONLY THOSE WHO HAVE EXPERIENCED ATTENTION DEFICIT DISORDER CAN TRULY AND HONESTLY UNDERSTAND IT.
DAM RIGHT!
Thankyou all so very much!!!!! I was almost in tears reading through the messages. The probability that it is genetic is the part my Dad seems to be having trouble with as we are very, very alike and he refuses to belive he could ever have ADHD. Im almost positve he does.
I was so excited when I was diagnosed and couldnt understand why everyone else was feeling sorry for me or telling me I needed to get another opinion and then another if that opinion had the same diagnosis.
I'm so glad I found this site by pure accident. It must have been fate. My husband rolled his eyes with a smile last night as he knew I'd be hooked on here from now on!!!!
Thanks again to you all
when i was a teenager, my dad used to tell me "i know you have ad/hd and everything, but a little bit of it is just laziness." they refused to take me in and get it diagnosed (they just self diagnosed me with it, as you know, could be dangerous) let alone start medication. they thought hollering and argueing and punishing me for my mediocre report cards or dirty room was a much better idea.
Just recently started meds a couple years ago... (went off of them cause I got pregnant and had a baby, and am now breastfeeding him...he is 5 months old; they said no strong ad/hd meds while breastfeeding...)
Yes, depending on how your folks are, it can be a issue to weigh in whether or not you should tell them about your disorder. Even for the closest family, I have found that their reaction can take you aback sometimes.
Lot's of people don't realize how big a decision it is to tell your parents. Sometimes it can cause a big huge rift between you and your folks for a while. You get so excited to say YES THERE IS A PROBLEM! HERE IS A NAME FOR IT! I CAN WORK ON FIXING MY LIFE NOW! AREN'T YOU PROUD OF ME??? only to get there rebuttle: that's not a real disease...or THAT DOCTOR'S JUST TRYING TO TAKE YOUR MONEY...or you don't really believe in that stuff, do you? is very hurtful....it's almost like there saying: there is nothing really wrong with you. you are just stubborn/foolish/lazy and you want excuses...you can fix yourself if you try hard enough...
it's a very painful thing to realize that this is how your loved ones think of you sometimes...
hang in there peita pan...we're here for you! your situation is something we have heard through here many times.
sonya_h38670.3365162037What helped me the most was to educate myself about ADHD as much as I could before I told my parents (I was 40!). I also gave them articles and emailed them information from time to time.
They still had a hard time, especially thinking that it probably was genetic.
By then I knew I got it from my mom, who got it from her mom. My daughter has it as well.
My mom thinks it can be "fixed" with supplements. I think some supplements possibly help some of the symptoms but this is just the way I'm "wired".
My parents have seen a change in me since my DX and starting medication.
The more knowledge you have, the more confident you will feel if they ask questions. Be happy that you know, and you can begin taking steps to improve your life. 
(I would highly recommend the book "Driven To Distraction", author; Hollowell)
bepatient38670.3545138889Hi all. I have only just been diagnosed with adult ADHD at thirty years of age. My parents were told I was overactive when I was a baby but they refused medication for me. Hyperactive was a common term in my school reports. But even now at this age and armed with a thick report declaring I most certainly have ADHD, my parents still to believe in such a disorder.
Did any of you have a similar reaction from family members when you were diagnosed??
I'd love any feedback as I have found it quite hurtful
Awww peita! I hear that a lot here. My dad - he thinks I'm still just lazy - but that's because I trace the DNA back to his side (his brothers all died alone, alcoholic because of undiagnosed ADHD I'm certain) he wants to shove it under a rug somewhere.
My mother - my rock of gibraltar has been my supporter. Without her - it would have been tough.
But lots have trouble. Get all the help elsewhere you can - and when you talk to them with new confidence and self-control they'll be forced to say "wow - there must be something to that".
Don't worry - heal yourself first - then worry about the ones around you ok?
We're here for each other - don't hesitate to ask if you need help to get along.
With a diagnosis, you're a step ahead most 'ADULTS'over 40, my doc thinks its something else, but he really doesen't know me. If your family doesen't realise ADHD as a problem, then you are most likely in the same situation as 70% of the other people who post here. I won't say "be thankful", because It can be as much of a burden as a blessing. I have been told all my life that 'I don't have any common sense", and I find it a blessing!! If I had common sense, I wouldn't be making nearly as much, probably wouldn't have half of the artistic/poetic/humorous/intuitive/provacative capabilities I have now!! Now, If I could just FIND MY KEYS!! My brother never told me his daughter,my niece, was diagnosed ADHD, and it didn't register in my mind when my son was diagnosed, that it could be genetic! I never saw a problem with my sons behaviour because he's just like ME! And I'm proud of him!
My parents have forgotten that they were advised to have me assessed when I started highschool. Instead I got in trouble for messing around in class cos that's what their understanding of an ADHD kid was, well still is I think.
My dad reckons its all a big cop out for not being responsible, my dad could very well be ADHD himself if he actually took the time to stop and look at himself.
My mum thinks I do everything for attention and has decided it should be called attention demanding disorder.
I certainly did not get the response from them that I had expected, which has kind of made me start questioning myself and my diagnosis even though I know I truly do have ADHD