le. and yes, not foot and mouth disease , foot IN mouth. yes oh yes. i'm in troubat work no less!!
my day totally sucked. i'm inside sales i sold more than i ever have..but along the way i made a horrible error. i was eating lunch with my manager (and we happen to be good friends) and unfortunately i ranted about the morning..and how one of my coworkers (among others who had no showed) was late and did anyone care? does she ever come to work on time? and she was in the room...sleeping on the floor and i didn't even see her. my friend has bipolar, has had some issues, like having her car repossesed, her family abandon her, her grandmother kicking her out of the house, her new car being wrecked etc. she's like walking bad luck. "chrissy" and i have been friends on and off..i've tried to help her out. when she seemed stressed out i told her i would pay for her yoga class and when she was without furniture i offered to give her my chouch, i had just replaced my old one. anyway i tried every way possible to help her without being overbearing..wanted to help and i felt like i was just helpless with her. she didn't seem interested in taking her meds which she needed to be desperately on. .she refused to get on lithium or the other drugs in the same class that would of worked best b/c she would gain weight. i was kind of angry for her b/c i felt like she could be helping herself and all she could do was bitch.
i've heard her say things like "i'm better than this job. i need a real job that i can leave when i need to instead of some preset time, i hate the job, this job sucks, i can't stand it' blah blah blah.
she left our small office for almost three months to go to the psych ward..and yeah you guys can tell by now she has major issues (and i have mine for sure) so i'm just trying to demonstrate how basically, since she works full time, she gets insurance coverage for all of her meds, her hospital stay etc, and both her higher ups are totally supportive.
well today i made the mistake of mentioning her record of being late stating that 'when i'm late at least i CARE" so yes, i'm an evil opinionated person.
so now she wont' talk to me. she tells me that i've been gossiping about her etc. i'm very upset. i do not want things to be like this btwn the two of us. but i see no recourse. i've apologized today repeatedly. i told her this is truly no friendship if she refuses to even accept my apology. i don't even expect her to be happy or pleased with me, nor right away. but at least hear me out before you go off accusing me of being the worst friend ever. i have never besmirched her reputation nor whispered nor disclosed anything i know about her hospital stay etc..about her family issues etc.
she told me that she didn't spread my business about my marital issues.and i told her for that i am grateful. however, i'm not spreading any gossip about her. i've never spoken about her to anyone. it was just this ONE DAY that i was totally fed up about my coworkers absolute lack of work ethic, i guess i try so hard to do well, i get pissed b/c everyone else is like 'whatever' and our job is really quite easy considering the benefits..hmm..customer service team, full insurance including dental, great compensation, two weeks of vacation, plus you can buy an extra plus paid summer fridays off..so what gives?
aargh! i wish i had never said that .i'm in regretful mode. i'm upset, i'm deppressed. i feel like a failure. and god knows now that i will have my nose to the grindstone just working my ass off at work bc i don't want to deal with my personal disaster with her. i just don't have the energy. she'll probably tell the whole office that i'm a jerk and that i cannot be trusted which is ridiculous.
who knows, you out there might think i deserve this. but i already feel guilty and remorseful. i'm willing to apologize and i have. do you think that she could expend some effort in trying to be understanding? i asked her if one is not entitled to a mistake in a friendship. she said she can never trust me again. surely it was rude. but i in no way endangered her position at work. i in no way accused her of anything. it was just a venting b/c the morning was hectic with four employees out of seven not being on the phone..and i and another coworker had to pick up the slack, nonstop for about three hours. geez.
sumi
After a chaotic end to last week (does anyone else find travelling very strenous, even just a day trip to the big smoke?) - I thought I was getting settled down this evening. Finally got on top of my tax return, put up some web pages I've been sitting on for ages, and had a really good swim where I managed to do 50 lengths for the first time in months without getting bored.
I thought that exertion would mean I'd drop straight to sleep this evening. Two hours later, and I'm still wide awake.
Does this sound familiar?
Sumiah,
Did we both try to start a thread at the same time?
yes LOLLL i just noticed that..i was wondering what went wrong...i was thinking..surely someone did not have the same day that i had?
LOL
you made me smile for a moment ,
thanks
sumi
Well My foot was in my mouth recently when I angrily mentioned to my step father (after an argument with my Mum) that now I can see why my father was an alcoholic - My mother drove him to drink. And after my poor mother suffering 15 years with that drunk twit, my stupid angry foot in mouth has now killed our relationship (hopefully only temporarily).