ADHD & BEING SPECIAL | ADHD Information

HI THERE HAS ANYONE EVER FELT THAT HAVING ADHD DOESNT MAKE YOU FEEL THAT YOUR AS SPECIAL AS OTHER PEOPLE. I'VE HAD A TOUGH LIFE & BEING YOUNGEST CHILD OF THREE,IN MY MUM'S EYES I'VE ALWAYS FELT LIKE MY BROTHER & SISTER COME 1ST. WHEN EVER PEOPLE GIVE ME COMPLIMENTS OR ARE NICE TOO ME I ALWAYS WONDER IS IT COS I HAVE ADHD & THEY JUST TRYING TO KEEP ME HAPPY INCASE I HAVE A TURN COME ON OR ARE THEY REALLY THINKING IM SPECIAL TOO THEM. I HAVE SUCH LOW SELF CONFIDENCE IN MYSELF, MY ADHD DOES NOT HELP BUT I GUESS ITS SOMETHING I HAVE TO LIVE WITH SOME DAYS I WANNA ACT LIKE I DONT HAVE THIS CONDITION BUT I CAN'T AS ITS VERY CONTROLLING AND I ALWAYS FEEL LIKE IM LIVING THROUGH IT DAY IN DAY OUT. I ALSO HAVE A PROBLEM WITH AFFECTION AS I NEVER FEEL I DESERVE IT I CLING TO PEOPLE AS I KNOW I WILL ALWAYS LOSE THEM WHICH HAS BEEN HAPPENING RECENTLY WITH A CERTAIN GUY THAT I LIKE HIS 27 IM 18 WE LIVE ABOUT 2HRS FROM EACH OTHER

Hey! Don't be so hard on yourself.  You are special, everyone is.. not matter what condition they have.  I have panicdisorder, my son ADHD, my daughter seems to have tendancies like mine.. however, no matter what we do, how we act or what sickness may become us.. We are all unique individuals who have challenges and journeys to fulfill..

Let yourself be loved, and give yourself a break.  You may have felt rejected, but you are you, and that is important!

Hope all is well...

Take care of you..and best of luck

 

You are special! My kids are both miracles. I can't have kids according to medical science but God promised me perfect children. Guess what! I gave birth to 2 and one definitely has ADHD and I strongly suspect that the other does also. If God promised me perfect children (meaning nothing wrong with them) and they have ADHD, then that convinces me that ADHD is not something bad.

God created you and He doesn't make junk!

You have a lifetime ahead of you and your ADHD symptoms can actually be used by you to make something wonderful happen in your life. Maybe you will be an inventor or a great artist or.... anything that requires the ability to think outside of the box that so called normal people are trapped in!

Mel, look ahead and not behind you. Only look back at those things you need to learn from and then only to learn, not to regret.

 Also, you don't need a man to validate your life. When the right one comes along, the only way you will be ready for him is to spend more time preparing yourself for your future and less time trying to be what you think some guy will want. He will love you for who you are, so spend your time making wise decisions so you will be ready to share your life with him, not just turn it over to him and make him responsible for your happiness and sense of self worth. (I had to put this in. I have a daughter near your age and I can't keep listening to you being upset over a guy who doesn't treat you right without saying something.) Hope you don't mind. Too late, you read it!  Barb

Thanks Barb I do appreciate your comments. Its just really hard for me as ADHD kinda makes your hopes seem even more real when things dont go my way I can't deal with it. When I feel positvie about anything I build my hopes up so much but then get let down. I dont want to come across as desperate to this guy that I like as I was the one doing all the chasing I made it clear Im not putting up with it so didnt hear from him for last month but he phoned me the other day explaining his sorry & so on but I dont believe him he txt me that night saying "I really miss you" But I haven't contacted him since.

I know I am young at 18 but I need stability in my life I can't deal with people walking out of my life all the time Adhd makes it so difficult not to cling to people as this condition is very over-powering some of the time

We are special.  We are normally passionate people.  We are philosophical.  We are abstract thinkers.  We don't fit into western society's linear thinking and learning.  We are creative.  creative people have a difficult time in our rational, step by step culture.  Our minds are geared to looking at the big picture.

Ive been reading many of your posts in reply to my subject "Adhd & being special"

I suffer from stress its probably as Im not that happy with my life. I have only a few friends but they do not know about my behavioural problems. A few months ago my dad died but I never knew him he was a stranger to me but I wish he could have been here to see me turn 18yrs old last week.

I have had 3 long term boyfriends since the age of 14yrs but only my current boyfriend has been in my life for 2yrs he wonders why I act the way I do I sort of said I have few problems he said "I can tell that by the way you act so childish" I come across as selfish as I always want to be in the spotlight always "Me, Me Me" I know that must drive people mad

I understand what your saying. I have struggled my whole life, most of my early years figureing out what was wrong, as ADD/ADHD was not diagnosed when I was young. I was known as the disruptive one sent out in the hallway that not only did kids hate because I talked ALOT! but teachers had issues with...I am sure I had/have a learning disability with it so I felt stupid/dumb, couldn't keep up. I also was VERY clingy in relationships and I didn't feel loved enough (still having issues with this) I have a hard time sometimes seeing what others see and why some love me. (I am 42 and have felt this way since a child)

I agree with OpenYourEyes - we are passinate people! and philosophical and different are abstract thinkers! We are definately creative and We don't fit into the *norms*.  It dawned on me the other day, as I now attend ADD group sessions one night a week, where we discussed issues, lastest meds, studies etc., that just like there are Special ed teachers, there should be ADD teachers. It would change ADD children's lives to learn among others like themselves and to allow them to express their special qualities that ONLY ADD people have but aren't measure within the set of *norms* in our society.  We are gauged against everyone else, the simple, daily mundane tasks that bore or frustrate ADDer's, not the amazing thoughts we have, that we also discount because we feel we are dumb, slow, stupid.

Growing up I struggled daily because no one was like *me*? no one wanted to talk about their feelings and I felt alone and isolated. I was sexually abused, when thru depression later in High School and thereafter. I learned to *shut* down and isolate to protect and think. I had an eating disorder. I have struggled with control, self-esteem, trust issues my whole life, and with ADD there is enough self-esteem, self-confidence issues without the *incident*. I am trying still to work thru them, read, therapy, journal my thoughts, meds whatever it takes to be *whole*.  I KNOW I will struggle more than others, stress will be double for me, negative thoughts are harder to fight off!

Your NOT alone with your feelings, don't think YOU are!!! Lots of us share your thoughts dear, it is finding a board, group, etc. like this to express what you feel so YOU feel *normal* as normal as ADDer's can feel. We are like a subset

ONE thing I know that helps me and might help YOU are subliminal tapes!! I always say the tapes work thru the *back* door! they work on our sub-conscious, since our conscious is soooo strong!  I put the tapes in alot in the mornings when I might be down or my mind is running tooo fast! All you hear is pleasant music and messages are unlying. They have tapes on Self-esteem, self-confidence, etc. Valley of the Sun publishing are the ones I use but you can find any out there I am sure. hope that helps!

Barb mentioned maybe you will/can do something great with your life! I always felt that I wanted to, I had a ton of jobs!  I am finally at one for over 6 yrs and just started up my own business! (it has a board too, beauty board) For someone who has struggle with one job I know do 2! You will find what is special about YOU, it might take a bit dear, it is the road that defines who we are, although we don't see it at the time we travel it!!  {{hugs}}

ADHDadult38208.3833796296

know where you are coming from youngest of 5 here.  but rather than feel 5th best - I tell myself that mum stopped when she finally reached perfection .

I dont think of adhd as a condition.  I just think of myself as this is who I am and these are my quirks - I dont blame anything on a condition.  And I laugh a hell of a lot with myself about myself and I forgive myself regularly.

Geez - there is so much wrong with people in general even the muggles (non adhder's) so I dont think who I am is that bad.  There are many worse ways to be - always look on the positive.  I have a healthy body (a bit flabby but healthy), I am good lookin , I am funny, I write some interesting poety, I am a great mum (even if my kids dont always think so), I etc etc etc.   Dont focus on what you aren't that great at - think of what you are good at and do something with it.

........ and ......  there is nothing wrong with needing people in your life or being scared of them leaving - that is normal. What you need to think about is if the person you are allowing in your life is worth it.  Be a bit up yourself or ruthless even when it comes to finding a mate as it seems that you give your all when you do commit.  Do you know some people never truly commit and "committers" can seem very scary to some men.  Dont make my mistake and give your heart to the first bloke you think will take care of you as being the type of people we are - bad blokes can see a sucker for a mile and zone right on in.  So even if you have all these insecure feelings, what you have to offer in the way of loyalty and devotion is not a gift that should be given lightly.  Treat the blokes that enter your life like they are applying for a job.  And when the right one with all the right credentials (a carefully compiled list of traits that you desire in a man) comes along then snag him .  IS THIS HELPFUL - or am I just babbling