ADHD or more?
Well I hope you can figure this out with your son I know how frustrating it is to not know what it is, we are really struggling with our daughter and getting her dx. And I hope that my son will be able to get some help here soon too. He hs an appointment with a behavirial Dr. next month, the soonest I could get him in but he also uses his fingers to do his math papers just adding and subtracting at this piont , and he has a terrible time stay organized too. I am sure though that one day this will all pan out and we can lead some what of a normal life right now it is hard to see that light but I keep trying.
Keep me updated on your son I would love to hear more.
Sincerely
Sandi
Hi Sandi,
Thanks for replying, my sons delayed socaillyand academically too. He's in fifth grade, he can read pretty well, but his comprehension isn't where it should be and his spelling is horrible(he still has to master phonics). Math is bad because he just can't or won't memorize the X's tables which makes division and any math connected hard. He still counts on his fingers, even for a basic problem ( 8-5 for example). It's all just getting worse. And we're going to have to stop the Learning Center ( its expensive and after 2 years the moneys getting harder to come by). So now I'm wondering how far behind is he going to get now, and he doesn't qualify for summer services, I'm at a loss. Thanks again,
Carol
Wow I can say that I really feel for you especially the over whelmed part. I have 3 children two of which we are in the process of being evaluated one is 9 yrs old and the other is 4 (the nine yrd old is a twin and his brother does not have the same issues he does thank god) But any how I am curious when you say your son is behind in developoment is it social, speech, or just in general. Because my daughter is speeched delayed not that she doesn't speak but just behind in the development. She can communicate but she sounds like a two or three year old speaking most of the time. She is improving with her early intervention, but still behind. My son on the other hand has not had any developmental problems just very impulsive and hyperactive. We have tried one stimulate for mmy daughters hyperactivity and lack of focus but it made her worse, but we are still trying. I would really like to hear about your sons developmental issues though. The pschy is telling me that my daughter could be on the Autisim spectrum (high functioning) but they say it is to early to really dx, but then again he said it could just be that she is ADHD with aniexty problems.
I would really like to hear mosre about you situation
Sincerely
Sandi DiPaola
Hi Everyone,
I really need some insight. My son will be 11 in June, he is currently in fifth grade. So were looking at middle school next year. He was diagnosed ADHD when he was 6, and has been in an inclusion class since first grade. He is on Concerta and does okay with it we haven't had any problems beside increasing the dose at the beginning of the year. He is delayed, which is separate from the ADHD, we have him attending the Huntington Learning Center (2 years), bascially they say he's at about the end of a third grade level. I spoke to his teachers this week (he's annual meeting is coming up) and basically he has trouble with anything done with the whole class(21 kids) he doesn't focus, zones out. There not even sure if he realizes it (whether its from not understanding or it just being too much), he does better of courese with the smaller groups or 1 on 1. He's not an overall behavior problem but he does act out sometimes. He recently got in trouble for going under all the bathroom stalls and locking the doors. When asked why he had no answer and kind of laughed at the teacher. He told me he thought it was funny. He's very immature for his age, so he really doesn't have any friends. We try to talk to him about some of the things he does and how it can put off some kids. He'll just pick his nose in the middle of class and doesn't get how if he just uses a tissue.... He's also small for his age which doesn't help. Any way, They want to put him in a self-contained classroom next year (15 kids) but my husband says it'll make things worse for him socially and he'll regress even more. I'm undecided, as much as I want him to stay in the inclusion class, sixth grade is going to harder, he's still not going to have friends (assuming he doesn't do a great deal of maturing over the summer). So maybe the smaller class will be better even if he's labeled by the other kids. I mean they pretty much have him labeled one way or another. Does anyone have any suggestions or advice? Also, I'm starting to think maybe its not just ADHD or him being delayed, could it be something else. I have 3 other children, and it just gets so overwhelming. Thank you some much. 
Carol
Just wanted to let you know I had my sons annual meeting Friday, he's going to be in the self contained class. We also went to a psychologist on Thursday. So I'm hoping that will give us some help, mostly for my son (with learning to make friends, etc.). Thanks for the info.
If anyone else has any advice, I'd be happy to hear from anyone. Thanks, Carol
I suggest for math facts a tape that plays them in songs. Play it nightly. Math you see sells it which is where I got ours at. If he's using fingers that also shows they are Kinetic as well. Son is same way here.
I read being adhd use to be termed hyperkinetic learner. They have a picturing in the brain issue. Lindamood- bell method teaches how to do this. Rn
Montessorie classes are best for kinetic learners.
Asd is suppose to be detectable by age 30 months.Hi Skye,
Thank you so much. Actually my son does have an IEP, he's in an inclusion class. Which has a regular teacher and a special education teacher or an aide also during the day. I think one of the problems I have with the IEP's is I don't know what accomodations they have to make. They only say what they think, for example it never occurred to me to get a copy of the notes before the lesson. I also think they may respond with " he needs to learn to be responsible and not have everything done for him." How do you respond to that? His annual evaluation is tomorrow, and I'm pretty much in favor of the contained class but I don't know how to explain it to him. He's going to see everyone in school that he knows and none of them will be in his class. Also, did you have trouble on the bus? And if you don't mind, do you have any suggestions that I can request for him at the meeting, I'm not sure if it matters where you live, we live in NY.
Thanks again,
Carol
Carol,Okay, I really hope I can help you out here. Your son sounds exactly like me. My name's Skye and I'm seventeen and have had math and speech and reading delays all my life. I count with my fingers, have just really been getting times tables under my belt, and am fighting the school for recognition. I didn't speak until I was five (both because of fluid build up so bad I couldn't hear and because of comprehension delays). I work with a speech therapist while I was in a special preschool but when I got to kindergarden was told I was fine. Against my mother's judgment she agreed to enter me into the school even though she thought I wasn't ready. I wasn't ready. I was held back in first grade due to reading and spelling problems. Even now I still read on a seventh grade level (I'm in eleventh).
My suggestion is... Well, my thoughts are that your son may be falling behind because his head just isn't working as fast as the teacher or group is talking. I don't know how clear that was so here's an example.
Say the teacher reads "The dog chased the cat. The cat ran up the tree. The dog barked from the bottom of the tree."
Your son (this is how it's been for me) may be hearing it as "The dog chased... up the tree... bottom of the tree." It is really frustrating for me because I know this is happening and start worrying about not getting everything and then I've stopped listening completly because I'm trying to figure out what the teacher said!
Have you gotten him evaluated outside the school district? By a learning consultant for children with adhd I mean. I go to one that's great and she's explained the reason behind all my problems. With the info. she's given me and my family and her support, we've been able to better understand how my head works and what accomadations I need from the school.
I understand your husband not wanting to take your son out of a normal class and all but your son may not be hanging out or interacting with friends because he thinks he's different and doesn't completly understand. I've had four close friends since about second grade and I still sometimes feel that way now. I mean, how can my friend just go right off and be like "Oh, well, you take the square route of this and multiply it by six and round it to the nearest tenth and you get 12.25." While I'm sitting there eyes wide and staring at him like "What?
". It's very frustrating.
Oh, and the whole bathroom thing: why do goofballs do what they do? To get attention from the other kids half the time. Your son really does probably want to fit in with his classmates (another reason why the smaller alternate class may be better, he may find kids with his same problems) and just can't because his mind is different.
But, anyway, did you know you can get an IEP or 504 plan for your son? Let me know if you've never heard of this and I'll tell you some more about it, but the accomodations on mine have really helped. I have problems with multi-tasking so the accomodation for a copy of classroom notes prior to the class instruction lets me listen to the teacher explain the notes and not have to concentrate on copying the notes themselves at the same time.
I think I've written enough. My mind just rambles on
. Let me know if you want some more info on any of this stuff or just to talk to some body with a similar mind to your sons.
Best of luck!Hey Carol,
As far as the requests, it all depends on how he works. I can't multi task hint the copy of notes. I also am suppose to get a list of the week's homework assignments so I don't have to remember to copy it or incase I copy it wrong.
Before I forget, you can't let the school tell you what your son's responsibilities are. If they do it'll only stress him out (the stress they caused me led me to have chronic migrains. not fun!). It is the schools responsibility to accomadate for the ADD. Your son has to do plenty on his own, all the accomodations do is help him, not do the work.
I live in New Jersey. My school has been pretty much telling me the same thing and they just don't understand any of it and the guy in charge of it all just doesn't care. We're pretty much running out of options. They've actually put me on homebound instruction because they're tired of me actually wanting the teachers to follow the leagal document they all signed. I'm just so terrible aren't I? Completly uncooperative?
Now I don't know what your financial situation is (I know you said about the learning center) but I didn't know what accomodations to make either until a neighbor recomended a Learning Consultant.
Here's a few of my accomodations if it's any help:
1.Extended time to complete all classwork and homework
2. Will be allowed to use a calculator for all math related activities.
3. Be seated towards the center of the room. (This is because of my delays. Being closer to the teacher speaking helps me concentrate better. At high school though, the teachers often move around the room, that's why I sit in the center.)
4. An outline of unit goals, objectives, and notes will be provided prior to classroom instruction.
5. An extra set of textbooks will be provided for home use. (This is because I forget, or 'active working memory', and because I'm out a lot due to migrains.)
6. A template for written assignments and projects will be provided. (meaning an example of a term paper or show me an example of the poster or project).
7. An alternate assignment will be provided 'in lieu' of oral presentations.
8. A list of the week's homework assignments will be provided.
9. Preferential choice of teachers shall be provided. (This way we can choose the most 'ADD friendly' teachers. More understanding teachers and less close-minded ones.)
Um, I can't thank of any more right now. These are all for my learning style though. It'd be best to ask your son what his problems are and think of what you guys can do to help it. I also have never been in an inclusion class. Maybe this'll give you some hope, but I'm in all college prep classes including a Biology Lab.
Looks like I'm a bit opposite than your son and am more mature for my age. I'm passed the not caring, the self-concious, the angry, and now I'm just getting done the exhuastion part. I'm learning not to let them bug me as much, it's a work in progress.
Oh, what do you mean about problems with the bus? Behavior on it, you mean? I never have really because I sat with the same friends every year and after we started going to different school I just sat where there was a seat (it's pretty packed). If your son does have problems (depending what they are) I'd suggest head phones. Listen to the music instead of the kids.
I have ADD though, not the hyperactive part so how your son acts is probably different in that aspect. Also, he may not 'regress' more in the self-contained class. He may not feel as if he has to catch up with the others as much. He may be more comfortable and it may help him mature and become more social, not less.
I really hope this will help you out tomorrow.
Keep going and don't lose hope!
Oh, also Carol, I don't know how active your kid is I'm just taking in account of his hyperactivity, maybe he'd do good with some kid of extracuricular activity. Something he likes to do whether it's play soccar or chess matches. This'll give him something to use up his energy and possibly meet new friends. I did karate for a while, I know a lot of ADHD guys that love it.
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