Low? How about people who really suffer? | ADHD Information

A question I ask myself quite regularly - I'm feeling down, but what's my excuse? I've always had a materially comfortable upbringing, loving parents and a roof over my head, even if I have a lot of debts with it.

I have a dcent income, which at long last exceeds my levels of debt payments, and keeps paying out even over the last few weeks when I've been unable to do much work.

I start feeling sorry for myself, and then switch on the news and see there are millions of people out there who are much worse off than I am.

So do we have a "right" to feel low? I can't really explain my depression at the moment, it is like I am in a pit, and every time I start climbing out of it, I slip back down again.

Maybe I am just itching for a proper assessment, which I am due for at the start of September, but I don't want to place too many hopes on this being an instant cure all.

For the time being, my mind is like a nice car without a steering wheel.

And I suppose none of us would let a good car stand idle, just because it needed a new steering wheel. Right?

To me, for awhile it seemed like the depression topic had taken over this board! However, it is common for ADHD people to be depressed. On the other hand, it can get pretty handy to complain constantly about your problems and never do anything to resolve them.

While I understand that depression is co-morbid with ADHD (I'm on Lexapro right now) I also think depression can mimic ADHD. Disorganization, lack of focus and concentration are also symptoms of someone under severe stress. 

I get depressed usually due to ADHD symptoms interfering in my life. But the depression eventually lifts. I try not to dwell on it but I will acknowledge it.

Cheekydeeky

Cheeky,

Thanks for the support. I'm hoping it will lift too, but I suppose I'm always looking for faster ways out of that hole. I don't know what will happen with my meeting in September. I know that the person I am seeing is one of the few in the UK to recognise ADHD in adults in the UK. I know that I have always had these symptoms, but only recently learnt that it was a treatable condition, rather than a personality trait which had to be endured.

My levels of organisation (both in my head, and externally) have plummeted this year, and with this have come some mood swings at a level which I have not experienced for several years.

We all want a way out when we are feeling down. ADD should give us enough ideas to eventually find a solution. But right now, I am still in the pit, and not fully understanding why I am finding it so hard to get out.

Idea - I completely understand where you are coming from!!  I go through the exact same thing.  I get depressed (also on Lexapro and Wellbutrin for that) and then I like "yell" at myself because I have so much to be grateful for!  Then I think I'm a terrible greedy person for feeling like I do. 

I, too, earn a good living, a nice house that we own, good husband, benefits so I can go to doctors for therapy (don't know where I'd be without that!), etc, etc.  But it seems I always want more.

But I've discussed this with others and the concensus seems to be that it is just human nature to strive for more, to make things better (even if they're not that bad to begin with).  Which makes sense. 

Between therapy and the meds, I'm doing much better.  And you will too!  I still get kinda bummed about some things but it's not all consuming like it was before.

And it's funny, and others find this as well, once you get that "official" ADHD diagnosis . . . a lot of the clouds start lifting on their own.  You now know for sure what the problem is and you are on your way to making things better for yourself.

Meanwhile, spend the next month reading as much as you can on the subject so that when you see the doc you can be more of an aid in your own diagnosis.  Make sure you know *why* you believe you have ADHD.  It will help speed up the diagnosis.  It did in my case.

Keep us posted on how you are doing! 

. . . Kim

 

Unless we are experiencing physical pain, all suffering is in our head (literally). It is real, but it is in our head. Depression is a result of brain chemistry. So it does not really matter how good or bad your life is in relation to others, if your brain chemistry is off, you feel depressed. The bad news is that some of us are pre-disposed to this. The good news is that we can do quite a bit to control it.

When dissapointing, sad, or embarrasing things happen to us (as happens to ADDers frequently), our reactions alter our brain chemistry and can produce depression. It happens to everyone, just more often to us I think.

BUT... You can do a lot to control this. If it is very serious, medications can help. But there are also many other things you can do:

#1 - PHYSICAL ACTIVITY: This may help more than any single thing. It gets those brain chemicals really pumping! It can be running, brisk walking, basketball, tennis, or anything. Like RAE70 mentioned on another thread, physical work like gardening will do the same thing, plus it has the added benefit of being outdoors in the fresh air and sunshine!

#2 - GET OUTDOORS: One reason I think gardening makes people feel better is that you are close to nature. You dig in the soil, you see plants and flowers up close and touch them. Camping and hiking is also great. Even simple things like walking or playing ball in the park is good. I know I have had times in the winter when I have gotten out and spent a couple of ours shoveling snow and I felt great afterward! Anything like this gets your mind off worries and gives you a sense of accomplishment when you are done. Whatever it is, keep it simple (don't create stress with too big of a project).   

#3 - EAT WELL: I believe that high-carb, high-sugar, and artificial ingredients make both ADD and depression much worse. Overeating or undereating can do the same. If we eat well (as close to nature as possible, well balanced, and take vitamins if we need to) it gives our brains the proper fuel to produce the proper chemicals.

#4 -TURN OFF THE ELECTRONICS: Television and the internet can eat hours of our day and do nothing but fill our heads with negative images and thoughts. This produces chemical changes in our brains and can induce depression, sadness, anger, and other emotions. It is better to actually DO something. If you have a hobby or a craft, thit is great. Doing something with other people is even better (assuming you are with positive upbeat people).

#5 - VOLUNTEER: I will guarantee that if you go out and spend a day with a group of people doing something such as helping with Habitat for Humanity, stocking a soup kitchen, or something of the sort, you will feel much better. You will be working alongside other people who are kind, fun, and very nice. You will be doing something constructive that is focused on someone other than yourself. And you will no doubt be helping people much less fortunate than yourself!

Try some of these things and see if they help. All of these things will actually change your brain chemistry and make you feel better. It may not be enough to 100% solve everything, but it will help a good bit!

 

Chazinmo38222.4024421296

Chaz - you are switched on - excellent advice - i agree and I will refer to your post often.

But hey - can we just shout ourselves a feel sorry for me moment occassionaly.  lol

Before being diagnosed with ADHD the only thing that helped calm my ass down was the fact that I LOVE to ride. That was the only thing I had that would help calm me down, and get me to a point that I truly believed "was normal."

Now, I enjoy riding even more!!! I love going outside and enjoying fun in the sun! Depression used to be really a major issue with me. Before if the wife took the kids somewhere and I remained at home, I would immediately pull out my old standby DVD of Apocolypse Now.

How many ADD or ADHDers out there have their old standby depressing ass movies that they love to watch but don't know why? I simply don't watch many shows like that anymore. Also, I used to LOVE to watch political debates and just fuel my own little flames of emotional baggage just to feel better, like I actually accomplished something before. Now, eh, not so much, now, I don't even like to be put in a situation where something might upset me. I don't hide from it, but I don't seek it out like I used to.

Anyone else here ever encounter any of the topics I mentioned?

By all means!

I feel sorry for myself quite often.

It is probably good to take some time for that also. I am sort of on my own when I feel miserable, so I do take time to feel sorry for mysef (dammit, someone has to do it)!

My type of response to these things is a male trait (I am about to get into trouble here I fear). It seems that women tend to be very good with empathy (I feel your pain) while men want to come up with a quick solution. For some of us, that does not allways necesarrily mean the correct solution.

But you are right. It is good sometimes to just feel bad for awhile and get out of your system!

Chazinmo,

Those look like good tips.

1&2 I'm ok at - I have been doing some form of exercise about 5 times each week, but my two non exercise days have already been used up this week!

I like to get out on my bike, but the weather recently has been really miserable over here - I think one of the worst summers I can remember. I really should get out a bit further - there are some great national parks within a couple of hours' train ride - I just need to do a little planning to get out there.

3 - I think my diet is fairly well balanced, but we could all do better.

4- LOL! I used to chain myself to my computer. Since 'crashing & burning' a few weeks ago, I've been giving the computer a miss, but have instead started watching loads of TV, which I don't normally do.

5 sounds worth checking out. I think I've been put off by the thought of a regular commitment. Oddly enough, the way I'd like to volunteer most would be to do something which involved counselling other people. I think that might put my own problems in perspective. I think that something which motivated other people would also help me motivate myself, as I'd have to act as a role model.

"It is good sometimes to just feel bad for awhile and get out of your system!"

Yes, but for how long?

To be honest, I've had very few down days since graduating from uni - perhaps one or two per year - certainly well within the range of "normal". This bout of depression has crept up on me suddenly, so I haven't really known what to do with it.

I think I've been so focussed on trying to keep my head above water for the last few years that now that I don't have to worry about money, I am suddenly realising how many other things (social life, relationships, real job satisfaction) I've been missing out on.

I think that clears the system a little...

 

Chaz - that male trait thing - now that is a another forum subject altogether - perhaps I will start one - keep an eye out -