4yr old wont go poop | ADHD Information
What makes you think he is not constipated? I think constipation only hurts if you have normal bowel movements, and then become constipated one day. Ongoing constipation stretches out the colon. Do a search on encopresis. My sons both had a great deal of trouble with this! One is diagnoed Adhd inattentive, and one isn't. I remember reading that they may be afraid of "losing a part of themselves". I never forced them or made that big a deal about it, but they still would not go on the potty at 4yrs! They would hold and hold and then they would get constipated. We had to use some kind of softener. My Adhd boy even got impacted a few times - he held it so long. The pediatrician said then that I had to use a fleet emema for children. Not fun. The next time he got impacted, I used a baby enema, which is smaller, less to go through, and did the job. Since the results are pretty instant, we just waited things out in the bathroom. He used the toilet from then on! The reason I'm sharing this info is that that was one one of our most stressful times, yet you can't really start talking about it at Starbucks!
Of course, I would talk to the doctor again before trying the enemas, etc. I just thought it would help you to have other's experiences as a reference. My son's pediatrician told me what to do - he never gave me a name for it! Make sure your son's pediatrician knows that this is more serious than a little boy who doesn't want to use the potty.P.S. I also found it helpful to buy some books. You may have already done this, but there are some good ones out there that are pop up etc. They make them feel more grown up for using the potty.
Koko38775.5156018519That sounds like a sensory issue more than ADHD -- try splashing a little prune juice in a drink -- then they have a hard time holding it in!
We have only just managed to get our almost four year old daughter to poop on the toilet, and boy was that an effort and a half.
Amelia too would hold on for days until her little belly was so bloated that she'd cry in pain. She'd go in a nappy though.
In the end we gave her Parachoc which softens the stools and makes it easier to pass even though she wasnt constipated. She also had issue with the poop being HERS and didnt want it going down the toilet. She always had to see it in the nappy too???
In the end I told her that the fish in the ocean would like her poopies and that big girls that go to big girl school have to poop on the toilet. We even promised her a bike if she went.
Long story shor, gave her parachoc which made it soft then had to hold her on the toilet until we heard it drop. She screamed blue murder at being held on the toilet and cried her little eyes out but as soon as she heard it drop, she stopped crying, got off to have a look and I made such a huge deal on how proud I was and what a big girl she was now etc. We had a party that night and she phoned the grandparents to tell them her big news 
I was in tears when she finally did it, I really understand how hard it is when they just wont go!!!
Now she tells everyone we meet that she does poopies on the toilet now and mummy is sooooo proud of her 
I don't know if this is ADHD related, and my son will not be officially dx for a couple of weeks, but he refuses to go poop. He will be 4 yrs next month and didn't start to tell us he had to "go pee" untill about 6-8 months ago. But he is holding his bowl movements for a maximum of 4 days! Poor little guy would try to eat, couldn't sit still, even worse than normally, and would run from the table saying he had to rest. I figure laying down doesn't feel so bad. The only way I can get him to go is to keep him in the bathroom, naked, and wait it out (literally
) It is such a tramatic situation though. He crys and keeps saying over and over "please don't do this, I don't want to go poopy". Sometimes we are in there over an hour untill he just can't hold it any more, then he jumps up on the toilet and goes. And it doesn't seem to hurt, he's not constipated. He just doesn't want to go. When he finally does go you can see the relief on his face. He feels better and he might even go a second time that day on his own. But come the next day we start all over again. Our doctor didn't seem to have any ideas when I talked to him. I almost wonder if it is some kind of controll issue for him because he keeps saying he doesn't want to go. I have tryed rewards, treats (he is obsessed with chocolate) taking away movies till he goes.... it always comes down to waiting till he can't hold it anymore. &nbs p; Please, any ideas would be appreciated cuz I am out. Thanks for reading my little book about a boy and his poopy 
My daughter is 2y & a bit, & she goes wee & poop on the toilet, not all the time only when her nappy is off, we'v only just started to potty train her but she's doing really well.
Thinking about it now my adhd son had poop problems he would hold it in til he cant no more, doctoers didnt seem to worried, even when he let it go in his pants!!
I had a hard time with him, then some one gave me advice:
Dont pester him to go (you try going when there's nothing there!) Let him go at his own pace even if it does take 4 days! When mikey use to have accidents in his pants, not to get mad, show no expresion & we made him clean himself up, now he very rarly goes in his pants its always in the loo, & he's praised for it.
I know its hard but relax & go at his pace, let us know how it goes.You need to rule out medical issues first (and yes, the condition is called encopresis). I encourage you to discuss what's going on with your pediatrician, who may refer you to a pediatric gastroenterologist for an evaluation. My son wan't poop trained until after 4. Almost 4 and a half. He pee trained at 3. He would go in his underwear after I quit using diapers. I was so glad when he started using the toilet.
sounds like sensory issues---my daughter wipes 20 times, so she doesn't feel dirty & wet........
Thanks everyone for your thoughts. So now I am wondering what is a sensory issue? I have seen it mentioned a few times here but not sure what it means.
I didn't think my son was constipated because when he finally did go, he didn't seem to have to push very hard and his poop seemed rather soft. There sure was alot though.
I have heard of kids being attached to it before, part of them. We would tell the poopy "bye bye" as he flushed and it didn't bother him.
Never realized so many kids had potty issues. Usually only hear about the ones that are trained before they reach 2! Nice to know we are not always the odd ball 
Thanks
For sensory issues search here under SID (Sensory Integration Disorder) and SPD (Sensory Processing Dysfunction). We have board on this topic also.
NoTellin38775.9631944444I have a very long history of dealing with encopresis. I also have never met a person (in-person or online) who has dealt with the issue at the extreme level that I have. If you feel that your son has encopresis, you may PM me if you would like input. I could practically write a book on potty training (which turned out not to be the issue) and encopresis.My son had the same issues. We tried everything to get him to poop in the toilet. He was still going in his pants at 4yo and we took him to the doctor finally after doing research and found out it was encopresis. The doctor agreed and we had to try a bunch of different things like diet, laxatives, stool softeners and finally enemas when he was going more than a week without a B.M. and his x-rays showed he was very backed up. Things stayed great for about 2 years and recently it all started over again. Back to square 1 with his treatment.
Bowels are 1 think you have control over. All kids are toilet trained when they are ready. Constipation is also sign of a thyroid problem as well. Iron can constipate as well. Our son hated being wet or dirty. He was trained at 4. This both and day. I was so glad all at once. The organ may just be underdeveloped.
I know in some cultures babies don't even use diapers at all they start training from day 1.
Mitchann, I had the same problem with my son, who is now 7. I took him to family therapists, GI specialists, everyone I could think of all to no avail. I even had to have GI write a note to school nurse allowing him to attend kindergarten in diapers due to low muscle tone/constipation. Two weeks before school he just did it. (He was still 4 when he started kindergarten, a Nov birthday) He has never had an accident nor is he ever constipated anymore. It is just one of those wait deals and it seems to me that boys are the poopy control freaks.
Be patient and good luck.
Donna
I work for a group of gastroenterologists, one of whom is a pediactric gastroenterologist. You are right in thinking it is a control issue. We see this a lot in young children. Usually it's because at some point they have had a painful bm and hold because of fear. The doc here usually has parents give something to keep the stool soft and regular and work out a positive behavior reward system. Good luck at any rate
we had to tell my son that he has to poop every day or he has to take the poopy medicine.he actually went for that and is now on a regular poop schedule every night before bed.
if he goes one day without a poop, he takes stool softener, if he goes more than one day,he has to use a supository.
Jase used to go for 3 or 4 days without a poop and then wind up going in his pants.
he's 5 1/2 and IN school which is a big problem with the other kids.
I finally talked to another friend of mine who was having similar issues, and found out that the kids can actually develop an enlarged colon from holding too long.
if the splash in the potty is an issue, drop a little toilet paper in before they sit down, then the water wont splash up.
jase is happy now that he's on a schedule.
Fruits help the bowels. Not to much or you get another issue then. Iron makes bowels hard also. I suggest fruits before supplements given.