It changed my perspective alot when i realized this:
when your routine is going as planned, you are okay, but even one minor little change will make u go nuts...
for example, you are driving your route home from work, and someone stops really fast in front of you, you (me, at least) get pissed and kind of freak out, it takes a few minutes to get over, but then once you are back on your normal routine, you are fine. i read that this is one big symtom of adhd, and the inability to handle stressful situations. take a breather, and realize that other people (your kids) are being stressed out by your problems...
[QUOTE=Honda]when your routine is going as planned, you are okay, but even one minor little change will make u go nuts...[/QUOTE]
Yup, unexpected change of plan = tail spin.
I had an emotionally abusive X. My solution was to communicate with him through a third party (my then current husband). It worked like a charm! Just remember, once your kids are 18 +, all communication is over!
I don't know if its normal for ADHD or not, but you do have a lot of stress in your life, both good and bad which is bound to affect you. I stress a lot over things also, although since I am getting closer to ancient, I have begun to realize that some things aren't worth stressing over.
Frankly, even knowing that every other time has been nothing more than a manipulation tactic, his threatening to try take the kids from you would still be a major stressor in my eyes. His letting you have them for years without him doing anything to change that before now, would go a long way in court towards making it very difficult for him to convince them the kids would be better off with him suddenly. Basically, his silence in the past would be considered an agreement that he did consider you to be a good mother. Keep reminding yourself of that.
barb38789.5711111111i am having such a bad day. Should be great, bought a brand new vehicle this weekend, my mom in law whom i adore will be here this evening from Wyoming, but i am freakin, Is it part of ADD to, i dunno be overly worried? My ex called and we got in a fight and he is threatening to take me to court for the kids, so all day i have been worrying and theres nothing i can to about it if he chooses to, and after 10 yrs of hearing the same line of crap and his trying to intimadate me and tell me how to run my life, i should know it is a shallow threat and have nothing to worry about even if he were telling the truth, but i am so stressed, i am yelling at the kids, just freaking over it, the new car, i am so worried, we havent had a car payment in years and now we have an exspensive one which i know we can afford, but anyway, is it just a part of the ADD to stress so much over things i have no control over and know when i am "sane" there really isnt anything to worry abut? i cant stop myself from thinking about it.
christi
So many of my friends have been through the same with the ex husbands and reacted the same way you have, so I think it's normal.