Need help | ADHD Information

Welcome!! can you give some info like the following?  age?  diagnoses? any meds? that will narrow it down for us to help you out.  like this, ds(dear son) age 8 adderall, severe adhd.

any pointers on ending the morning battles with teh ADHD child? It seems to be getting worse with my son and his mother. Any help?

We had difficulites in the mornings when he was young , until he took Ritlalin first thing in the morning. Sometimes he liked it with some food.  I really didn't expect too much from him until meds started kicking in. 
Now he wakes up, takes meds and then a shower.  It makes for a much better morning for all involved.  Now ds is 17
Point systems only worked for a short time when he was young and then he would lose interest in it...constantly changing points, tokens,  rewards, priveleges etc.
WE HAVE TRIED THE POINTS SYSTEM SEVERAL TIMES. JUST STARTED IT BACK AGAIN, BUT LIKE YOU SAID, THERE IS A LOSS OF INTEREST AFTER A WHILE. THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION, WILL TRY TO CHANGE THE SYSTEM UP AND THE REWARDS AS WELL.YES HE IS 8YEARS OLD AND HAS ADHD FROM WHAT WE WERE TOLD. HE IS TAKEN CONCERTA, ONE PILL A DAY TO HELP HIM IN SCHOOL. HE IS A GOOD CHILD, BUT JUST CANNOT GET IT TOGETHER WHEN DEALING WITH HIS MOTHER.

You can put him on a behavior system such as a point system that he can earn rewards or privledges....my son is also jumpy in the morning so we go down eat breakfast as soon as he wakes up then he gets his medicine and then he goes to the bathroom  he usually sits there and reads for about 15 minutes, then washes hands/face and brushes teeth...then he gets dressed  ( clothes are in bathroom) and is calm....I think he needs this bathroom time alone to get himself together ...it is important that  he has a predictable schedule to follow....when my son finishes all of this he is allowed to watch

 

birdietiel 
the marble system seems popular on this site.

my ds was just like yours when he was younger.  Our doc said the same thing about immediate gratification except I think I may have given him a reward for one good morning of getting ready =25cents.  Then later I'd up the expectation to two days in a row = 60 cents ;  and so on.  but you know, it only worked for a while and then he'd lose interest in the money. 

He needed lots of refocusing and it was very draining and demanded a lot of patience. 

He really needed meds to help him get ready in the morning and for homework too. That's where short acting ritalin is handy.  (end of the day)

Logical consequences often didn't work either because of short term memory.  He wouldn't remember what he did or what the consequence was and how they fit together.  To him, they were more or less separate events...his reality was very much in the present.   He has worn an alarm watch since 3rd grade to remind him when to take his meds and only started using it to find out what time it is at about 15 yrs of age.  His reality is just different.  HE is adhd/gifted or borderline/LD in Rdg&Writing/dysgraphic  and  amazingly gifted in math.   Keeps my life colorful!
jfla238790.8986574074My son has more difficulty in the evening. In the morning he seems zoned out. When he was younger he would spring out of bed and have tons of energy. The times I have the most problems with him is right after school and bed time, and homework time. He can never settle down to go to sleep, and then he's tired in the morning. The reward charts worked temporarily with us. Once he got what he wanted, he lost interest. He also knows how to manipulate it. His psychologist said as far as allowance for chores, instead of giving the money at the end of the week, give him some after he completes each chore. She thinks immediate gratification will motivate him more to do chores. It has so far. Without the system I had to ask 20 times for him to do something, and he never did it. It's still like that with things like getting ready for bed. He just doesn't listen or is so wrapped up in what he is doing. He seems to have no concept of time. In the morning, it will be 10 mins til he has to go out to the bus, and I always have to say you better get dressed, you need to go out in 10 mins. When will he be more aware and able to do it more on his own? Will meds help with these things?

jfla2, my son is also in the gifted math program.He is in 3rd grade, but in 4th grade math. He does very well academicially. He is at grade level for reading/writing. Sometimes he doesn't spell words correctly when writing. He is very intelligent. I was surprised he has adhd, because I thought usually adhd kids were behind in school. He has way more emotional problems. Sometimes his adhd interferes with his learning because he has trouble paying attention. They just started double digit multiplication, and he keeps making a careless mistake of adding the carried number twice.

Hi Hudsonshwn,
I do this: I wake up about a half and hour before my son, take his pill and a glass of water in and coax him awake just enough to take it, then he can sleep another half hour. By the time he gets up it seems to be starting in his system and it helps him stay even in the morning. Also, it helps to have a morning routine that you never deviate from, ADHD kids like routine. If nothing else works I announce that there will be consequences and I need to think about something especially painful. That usually changes some of the attitude. Best of luck.

Same as my son My son says I don't like yelling and we try to keep it to a tone that he'll listen.

cmrsmom

Hi Hudsonshwn,

When I read your post I couldn't help but respond because I seem to have more problems in the morning with my daughter then my H also.  In our case we both have ADD which kind of exaserbates things and in realizing this I know that I have to control my own behaviours first.  I see a psychologhist that has been a great help.  What I have learned from him is that the only way my daughter's behavior is going to change is directly linked to my own behaviors.  I admit I mess up some days, like today for example.  I yelled instead of posing consequences or rewards for doing a task.  I realize there will be days I mess up but the main thing is knowing that I have to change and continually working on that.  I don't know if this is the case with your wife, but sometimes we have to look at how we ourselves handle the situation.  Maybe there is something she can change in the routine. 

I know a calmer atmosphere helps with my daughter.  If I am calm and rational she tends to be more calm also and we can work together better on whatever the difficult situation is.  If I mess up one day I can't beat myself over the head over it.  I just have to start over and try again.   Finding out what triggers the bad situation can help too.  It's hard to change a routine or behavior sometimes but it can make a world of difference when you stick with it.   Just speaking from my own experience.  Hope something I said may have helped.    Dee