Hello, my name is Shawna and I am the mother of Tyler, 6. Tyler's struggles began early on, actually before conception. I have ADD. I was scared to have a child because of this. My daughter was born, and I was lucky. She has no learning disabilities, and is considered extremely gifted.
I started noticing signs of Tyler's ADHD almost from the beginning. I am very much in support of medication, but waited until Tyler started school to get his evaluation. By this time, Tyler was out of hand. He was diagnosed as ADHD, and to my surprise ODD as well. He takes Ritalin, and when it is in effect, he is a different child.
The problem, is that I cannot keep him medicated 24/7. When he is not "under the influence", he is a nightmare. He is violent, angry, verbally abusive, and destructive. All of this from a mere 5 year old. I am considering mood stablizing drugs, because therapy has had no affect. I would love to hear any parents experience with these drugs. I am scared for his future. Without control of his anger, I fear what he will be capable of. It is hard to imagine my sweet baby boy hurting someone, but there is no doubt that this will happen unless his current path is altered.
Even as I write this I am crying. I have never acknowledged just how afraid for him that I am. Please share your experiences with me, I am looking for any encouragement.
Shawna, welcome! You have a lot on your plate. I hope you find the information and support helpful here.
I'm wondering what kind of doctor diagnosed and is treating your son. If it's not a board-certified child psychiatrist, you need to find one now, and if it is, you need to get a second opinion. The kind of violence and aggression you are describing goes beyond ADHD. If a doctor is considering mood stabilizers, he may be thinking Bipolar Disorder, but you are owed an accurate diagnosis because the meds can either make or break your child's behavior. Ritalin, for example, can make a bipolar child much, much worse, even if it appears to be doing its job at times. If it is bipolar disorder, mood stabilizers are the way to go and can make all the difference in the world. I know -- I have 2 children with BP (a nearly 13-year-old son and an 11-year-old daughter). They are currently both on the mood stabilizer Depakote and doing better, but we are also trialing other meds (the mood stabilizer Lamictal in my daughter's case and still undetermined in my son's case) to see if we can improve things even more.
My son's psychiatrist this week told us that many kids with bipolar disorder receive the diagnosis of ADHD first. My son is no exception (my daughter's first diagnosis was unipolar depression). The inattention, hyperactivity and impulsiveness of an ADHD diagnosis are present in bipolar, but the anger and destruction go way beyond ADHD. I urge you to try to get an accurate diagnosis now so you can put the proper interventions into place. Good luck!
Tyler's mom-
Acknowledging the fear you have for your son's future is an accomplishment in itself even if it isn't comforting. My fear for my son's future sometimes consumes me. I do understand how overwhelming it can be.
My son has ADHD but not ODD (though I have often thought he has) and although he has more anger than most children it does not seem as severe as your son's. Unfortunatley, my child is not responding well to his medication. He may as well be taking a chocolate drop or something.
I cannot share any experience with regards to mood stabilizing drugs but I can share and understanding of how you feel.
Take care