New and Desperate | ADHD Information
thank you for your input.i also bought a trampoline but it is an outside one.unfortunately jude does not like puzzles,drawings ect...even movies or tv as he does not have any attention at all,he has a teacher at nursery who helps him as he constantly needs to be encouraged and to try to get him to stay in the same place 5 mns.did your son have a problem with danger awareness?jude has no sense of danger and will put himself or others in harm way just for fun which make it difficult to take him anywhere.your son sounds lovely and i hope he will find a friend who understands himThank you all so much...especially crazycat...you hit the nail on the head. It amazes me how much love I have for my son. He is truly my highest high and my lowest low. I just have to keep on trying and it is comforting to know that I am not alone....now I just wish everyone lived by me so we could get the boys together....aren't they something? Can you imagine a room full of 9-10 year old ADHD boys...all would jockey to lead and be first and try to take control...wouldn't that be a sight?reading between the lines I hear a mom whose heart is breaking.Most of us here have been through what you are going through.Seeing yor child left out of neighborhood play,seeing him alone and not invited to birthday parties,etc.Those things hurt so much,and you would do anything in your power to make things better,I know.Nine to ten yr olds are notorious for this "divide and conquer"and "you can't play with us" stuff,they can really be little beasts at that age! What helped us was to focus on the few friendships our boy did have-we invited the kids over and made sure they were somewhat supervised(but don't hover!)that way if our son was becoming overbearing or problems were developing,we could help the kids work it out before it hit that"flash point"where your child gets tossed out of the play.Put focus on the relationships he does have,help him to improve his social skills there,and in time you just might see some changes.I know its so hard to not take these things so personally-you just want to see him included and having fun,accepted and smiling.Don't lose heart--and remember even just one true friend can be a real refuge and joy. Meg, I am supportive of the alternative meds and will be starting my son on them, actually me too, to see if they help him comepletely or at least reduce the amount of ritalin he needs.Good morning,
I know you're not asking about the dx, but I just have to question why CJ has been on "every ADHD medication on the market"?
This, in itself, would raise serious concerns with me. If one ADHD medication doesn't work (stimulant), and you try another, and another, and another and they don't help with him, that is a problem.
Have you ever heard of PDD - Pervasive Development Disorder? My son has this - and the hyperactivity he displayed was considered ADHD, he was "classic textbook ADHD" too, at age 2. Now, at age 9, that is not the case. Hyperactivity is a symptom of PDD, but one of the big ones is the lack of social skills and the peer interaction problems. My son, again, at age 9, has this.
You can read about it here:
I would get a 2nd opinion, myself, because if the ADHD meds are not working that is a big light bulb going off. Can't stress that enough - my son has been on them all too, plus more. 19 meds to date.
You may want to explore some more options with your child. I know without the proper meds, Dylan was bouncing off the walls, and the stimulants (if there is a slight chance your child is NOT ADHD) are going to make your kid 10x worse.
My DS was quite a bit like that before we started meds. He is 6 now, but your pdoc is right, 9 is a cruel age for kids, it seems like they start feeling their oats.
DH and I have 2 friends with kids the same age as DS and we visit them for playdates, generally 2 a week. It's worked really well because we are able to supervise play and intervene immediately if there are problems. If you don't have friends with kids the same age, maybe there is a CHADD group in your area that you could do playdates with?
I am at a loss on how to deal with my son who just turned 9. He was diagnosed ADHD at the age of 2, after being kicked out of 2 daycares I sought treatment. I was reading the message boards prior to my joining and wanted to say to the one person who asked if their child who is 5 will outgrow this, and sad to say, it gets harder and harder as they get older and older.
CJ has been on every ADHD medication on the market starting on liquid Ritalin at 2. He is a classic textbook ADHD and let me emphasize "H"! Prior to taking Clonidine at the age of 4, he would be through sleeping at 3AM and would be bouncing off the walls until we medicated him with Celexa and Ritalin LA at 7AM. The Clonidine helps him sleep until 7AM and it has kept my sanity.
CJ is in 3rd Grade. His psychiatrist indicated this is a crucial stage in childhood development pertaining to friendships. I am sad to say that my son, who is an only child, has never been invited over to another child's home, nor has be ever been invited to a Birthday party. CJ has a tendency to dominate play groups and to be frank, the kids in our neighborhood just don't like him. As a parent, this breaks my heart because he really is a sweet, happy and loving boy. He just isn't able to interact in a large group. It is so hard when you live in a subdivision and look out your window and see the neighborhood kids playing football, or baseball...and my son is inside because he was told to go home.
I take him to ever social function at his school, he plays baseball and is great at it, and is also in the Chess Club at school. Academically he is awesome, but behaviorally he is a challenge. His father is military so CJ's manners are exceptional and any adult that encounters him compliments him on his manners and what a nice boy he is...but the kids don't like him. CJ does fine one on one, if his cousins visit, or a younger neighborhood child is over, but like I said earlier, when there is a group, he loses it.
Anyone else out there go through this or have any suggestions on how to help CJ?
janna and Taffy have a good point. I just re read your post and it says your DS was diagnosed at 2. That's really early to get an accurate diagnosis of ADHD. Perhaps now that he is older it is time to take DS to a different pdoc or neuropsychiatrist to get a second opinion. ADHD has a lot of mimicers that have similar symptoms but completely different treatments like HFA and bipolar. Your pdoc may have been trying to hammer this nail with the wrong spatula.Actually.... sometimes meds just don't work for ADHD. There are several on this site who have children truly dx'd with ADHD who have had complications and problems with the medication. Many have tried alternatives to meds to help with succes..... there is a forum with that title on this board if you are interested. Hope you find the answers you seek!
I am gonna agree with Janna. IF none of the meds worked.. then it can't be ADHD. My son has social issues too, but with help from a counselor.. he has come a long way. He went from being bullied by a group of kids, to actually be accepted by them and finally be inviting to the parties. Social cues and appropriateness is SOOO hard to learn. Also, Todd doesn't do well in groups either.. he will shut down and go watch tv. That is getting better, but he really does better one on one... and there is NOTHING wrong with that.There is no proof whatsoever that food dyes or additives causes ADHD or any disorder. I don't recall kids during my time (and I'm 52) eating any better than they do now. In fact, they knew less about healthy eating back then. ADHD existed, but wasn't diagnosed because it was unheard of, along with most childhood disorders. In fact, it was considered a "big secret" for a child to see a Psychiatrist. You kept it to yourself. Now it's almost "the thing." OlderMom38812.5805671296my son is 8 and was diagnosed with adhd last year we have known for a few years that he had some problem but we just didnt know what it was . I have not used any medication to treat him and his main problem is the hyperactivity ( also lack of concentration ) luckly teachers in england are a bit more relaxed and put up with the kids behaviour providing the parents are trying to sort something out . we are currently about to start the dore program with our son to see if this has any affect . The main thing we have a problem with is that the term adhd was not really heard of 10 years ago sowhere did it all start from poor diets? lack of discapline ? why is it that all of a sudden this is the main problem for chidren to be diagnosed with
IMac38945.6852662037i understand that it is something that must have always been around but you must admit that since political correctness went mad and parents softnened up on discipline and kids eat more additives and colouring times have changed in childrens behaviour .