neighbour trouble | ADHD Information
After playing outside today Brandon comes and tells me that he got in trouble from a lady downstairs in our bulilding. He was playing with 5 other kids outside an apartment building located across the street and down one. She lives on the first floor at the back of our apartment building. She said that Brandon woke up her husband with his yelling. She also told him that she would call the police if he does this again. She said her husband is very sick. They are elderly. This was at 5:30pm. Would somebody tell me how she could possibly know it was his voice from that far away? Especially since there were probably other kids playing outside other than the 6 of them. I live at the front of the building on the 5th floor. I had all of my windows open and was not disturbed by any yelling. I admit Brandon is very loud. I didn't think he was that loud though.Unless he has a very distinctive voice, I don't see how she could have known it was him if she did hear him. She is probably scared and worried about her husband and Brandon is the kid who came too close to her after she heard a kid and she assumed it was him. I feel for her but I also know that Brandon has the right to play without being yelled at for things everyone is doing, such as yelling.
I don't know what to say except that I was always the kid in our neighborhood who always got in trouble for being too loud. If there was a loud kid voice, everyone assumed it was me. I used to scream and really didn't know I was going to until it was out of my mouth. I got yelled at a lot. I really empathize with Brandon.
Barb were you loud at home too? I am just curious. If so, was there anything your parents told you that helped you control it? I though it was excitement that made Brandon talk loud. I guess it may be part of impulsiveness too. Did you outgrow it?
I have a friend who has ADHD. She said she was loud growing up. It really irritated her father. He yelled at her a lot.
Actually, I was loud at home until I discovered reading. We had a library next door when I first learned to read and guess where my mother loved to send me!
I was usually very good at other people's homes unless we got into a game that was very exciting. At home, I was bouncing off the walls a lot. My parents moved us to a farm so my older brother and I could have room to bounce outside. Really! Any chance you want to move to the country? It was great.
ppl complain about anything these days! i think it gives them something to do.....
[QUOTE=lovemyboy]
Auntie Brandon and the other kids were nowhere near our building. They were across the street and 2 buildings down. They were riding their bikes in the parking lot of that building. That's why I wonder how they even heard him.
[/QUOTE]
Echo??? Voices reverberate (sp?) off building especially brick ones. O.K. Do a test. Go have someone stand by the ole bats apartment and stand about where your son was riding his bike. Now scream as loud as you can. This will serve two purposes. You will be able to get your frustrations out and you will be able to find out if that ole bat is imagining things.
i love it.... do it lovemyboy..Auntie Brandon and the other kids were nowhere near our building. They were across the street and 2 buildings down. They were riding their bikes in the parking lot of that building. That's why I wonder how they even heard him.
SheriM he could use some earplugs if his hearing is that good that he can be woken uop from that distance!
Brandon is outside alone now riding his bike so there shoudn't be any complaints today.
Laurapalmer I guess people complain about barking dogs too!
[QUOTE=sheri.m] my ex use to tell me i was gonna die a lonely old b**ch[/QUOTE]
I think my X said those very same words to me. The mean X not the nice X. He used to say that when he KNEW I was right and didn't want to admit to it so out came the crap from his stupid mouth! I just don't know how they could they say such a thing about us! 
Were angels.
I have a feeling you are going to grow old to be one of those nasty ole bats! Really, really kidding but I just could resist! my ex use to tell me i was gonna die a lonely old b**chwe just saw our dr yesterday and discussed yelling as an issue.my son tends to be oppositional and we get into shouting matches.
she told me that adhd kids respond best to a good calm even tone of voice.
she told me to stop yelling. I've always been loud...and I am most certainly ADD!
she told me to try to keep from yelling for two weeks, and we'd see a marked improvement in jason's behavior...I dont know if I can do this but I am trying.
maybe yelling IS an adhd thing....but I dont think that the woman was right to tell your son she'd call the police.
You really have been having problems lately...grab that kid of yours and give him a big hug from us here in Pittsburgh. I hope that he knows how much you love him and worry about him and the creeps he has to deal with on a daily basis.
Yes some people just have too much time on their hands.
I wonder if I do the test I wonder how many complaints I would get.
I just gave him a big hug from you! He liked it!
im glad. im all about the hugs!!!!
Brandon likes to read with me. He has difficulty with reading comprehension so he really doesn't read alone.
His teacher thinks that he is loud and asks questions he knows the answer to because he has little self confidence.
I can't move to the country since I don't drive. Otherwise I wouldn't mind.
Tell that battelax to get a life and kids will be kids and as far let her call the cops. What are the cops going to do "please keep the children quiet", they do not want to be bothered with that. If it was only your son yelled at did you not have problems with idiots in your building already? If so could it have been targeted. Ignorant idiot people. Jillette38818.3798726852Yes I have had problems with idiots in my building recently. Unfortunately I think it happens almost anywhere you go. I never thought that this could have been planned. I really didn't think the police would do much anyhow. I think they are too busy.
oh this makes me mad.... for one it was in the middle of the day... not the middle of the night... i feel sorry that her husband is sick but they have to understand kids will be kids...if the apartment complex allows kids then there really isn't much the old bat can do.. we use to live next door to this man who worked midnights and he would yell and scream at the kids during the day... finally one day i had enough of his BS and told him off...i mean really did he think that all the kids were gonna be quiet just because he worked midnights.. i told him to go buy himself a pair of ear plugs and SHUT UP.... I was just wondering if being loud is part of ADHD. My son is 9 years old, on Adderall 20mg XR for 1 year and is extremely loud when he talks, it doesn't matter if you are sitting next from him. We are always telling him to talk lower, inside voice or giving him a signal to tone it down a little. I would really like to know. Glad I found this website.
SheriM I agree. I am angry too! The ironic thing is that Brandon was 3 buildings away and across the road. This is why I question that she can be certain that it was his voice she heard. I have heard many kids outside over the years and have no problem with it. In fact the teenagers would be outside playing and making all kinds of noise at 10pm. Brandon would have trouble falling asleep and it didn't bother me.
I suspect that being loud is associated with ADHD. Brandon has spoken loud for as long as I can remember. I don't think he realizes that he is so loud. Brandon also does this when I am right beside him. He is on 10mg of RitalinSR on school days. He is 10.
hey lovemyboy... run up to the store and buy some earplugs and drop them off at that apartment.. knock on the door and tell that old bat that your son will continue to play outside all summer and you would really hate for your son to wake her husband up again so you picked up a gift for him... [QUOTE=sheri.m] oh this makes me mad.... for one it was in the middle of the day... not the middle of the night... i feel sorry that her husband is sick but they have to understand kids will be kids...if the apartment complex allows kids then there really isn't much the old bat can do.. we use to live next door to this man who worked midnights and he would yell and scream at the kids during the day... finally one day i had enough of his BS and told him off...i mean really did he think that all the kids were gonna be quiet just because he worked midnights.. i told him to go buy himself a pair of ear plugs and SHUT UP.... [/QUOTE]
I feel bad that that person is sick but you know what, if I were laying on my bed ill the thing that would cheer me up most would be kids outside having the time of their lives! Playing kids, giggling and having fun cheers me up more than anything! Honestly, though...I think I am somewhat of an exception to people who no longer have kids at home.
I would suggest you may want to tell the kids to stay away from that side of the building.
Kids should be allowed to have fun but don't get angry at that woman who is protective of her ill husband. She is probably under so much stress, saddness and may be at the end of her rope. You just don't know. Maybe turn the other cheek? Take over a casserole or treat and say you are very sorry her husband is ill and that your son disturbed him. You never know, she may do a complete turn around. If not, well you did your best and did a nice thing. Just a thought.
Edited to add: If she is still nasty then you can toss her earplugs and tell her tough luck...kids will be kids.
[QUOTE=sheri.m] oh this makes me mad.... for one it was in the middle of the day... not the middle of the night... i feel sorry that her husband is sick but they have to understand kids will be kids...if the apartment complex allows kids then there really isn't much the old bat can do.. we use to live next door to this man who worked midnights and he would yell and scream at the kids during the day... finally one day i had enough of his BS and told him off...i mean really did he think that all the kids were gonna be quiet just because he worked midnights.. i told him to go buy himself a pair of ear plugs and SHUT UP.... [/QUOTE]
I feel bad that that person is sick but you know what, if I were laying on my bed ill the thing that would cheer me up most would be kids outside having the time of their lives! Playing kids, giggling and having fun cheers me up more than anything! Honestly, though...I think I am somewhat of an exception to people who no longer have kids at home.
I would suggest you may want to tell the kids to stay away from that side of the building. Kids should be allowed to have fun but don't get angry at that woman who is protective of her ill husband. She is probably under so much stress, saddness and may be at the end of her rope. You just don't know. Maybe turn the other cheek? Take over a casserole or treat and say you are very sorry her husband is ill and that your son disturbed him. You never know, she may do a complete turn around. If not, well you did your best and did a nice thing. Just a thought.
I knew you'd say that, so I quickly edited my post. Ha, ha!Really though, one can get mad at someone and not know the whole story. It certainly wouldn't hurt to talk to the lady. Sometimes people who are so bitter and angry all the time have no one who cares and just a little kindness can go a long way. Of course it can back-fire and then you'll really feel like crap but if you look at like, well I did everything I could then you are the better person for sure, confirmed and sealed. O.K. I'll shut up now with my warm and fuzzy stuff. [QUOTE=Auntie]Really though, one can get mad at someone and not know the whole story. It certainly wouldn't hurt to talk to the lady. Sometimes people who are so bitter and angry all the time have no one who cares and just a little kindness can go a long way. Of course it can back-fire and then you'll really feel like crap but if you look at like, well I did everything I could then you are the better person for sure, confirmed and sealed. O.K. I'll shut up now with my warm and fuzzy stuff. [/QUOTE] auntie, face it she is just a mean old bat who probably doesn't have grandkids... don't you just hate that? we have neighbors (wooded and pretty far away), well a few yrs back we had 3 yippee barking dogs & she called up proceeded to deny that the dogs annoy them. at the end of the phone call she then stated my dogs DO annoy her hubby.....so i told her nicely to put up a wooden fence, so my dogs can't see her hubby![QUOTE=sheri.m][QUOTE=Auntie]Really though, one can get mad at someone and not know the whole story. It certainly wouldn't hurt to talk to the lady. Sometimes people who are so bitter and angry all the time have no one who cares and just a little kindness can go a long way. Of course it can back-fire and then you'll really feel like crap but if you look at like, well I did everything I could then you are the better person for sure, confirmed and sealed. O.K. I'll shut up now with my warm and fuzzy stuff. [/QUOTE] auntie, face it she is just a mean old bat who probably doesn't have grandkids... [/QUOTE]
I'm sorry, I'm between a rock and a hard place. I love kids and I love older people and volunteer to help both. So I'm a little back and forth on this one. But I do know there are old bats out there, for sure. When I go into the nursing home to pick up my adopted grandparents I stop in some of the rooms to chat a bit and there is one lady that was the meanest person ever. At first I said, the H*ll with her and didn't stop by the next few visits. (It really hurt my feelings) Then I thought, I'd give it one more try and she was still mean as heck! I got stubborn and continued stopping in. She is still mean but now she asks me "Where the H*ll have you been!" Even though she is still mean I leave the room laughing.
[QUOTE=sheri.m][QUOTE=Auntie]Really though, one can get mad at someone and not know the whole story. It certainly wouldn't hurt to talk to the lady. Sometimes people who are so bitter and angry all the time have no one who cares and just a little kindness can go a long way. Of course it can back-fire and then you'll really feel like crap but if you look at like, well I did everything I could then you are the better person for sure, confirmed and sealed. O.K. I'll shut up now with my warm and fuzzy stuff. [/QUOTE] auntie, face it she is just a mean old bat who probably doesn't have grandkids... [/QUOTE]
I'm sorry, I'm between a rock and a hard place. I love kids and I love older people and volunteer to help both. So I'm a little back and forth on this one. But I do know there are old bats out there, for sure. When I go into the nursing home to pick up my adopted grandparents I stop in some of the rooms to chat a bit and there is one lady that was the meanest person ever. At first I said, the H*ll with her and didn't stop by the next few visits. (It really hurt my feelings) Then I thought, I'd give it one more try and she was still mean as heck! I got stubborn and continued stopping in. She is still mean but now she asks me "Where the H*ll have you been!" Even though she is still mean I leave the room laughing.