Receiving treatment from a doctor that includes prescription medications is not "taking drugs". Someone who has a life with no friends, a broken marriage, and no career as a result of non-treated ADD who goes out and self medicates with illegal substances from a dope dealer is "taking drugs".
I think it is wise to explore all possibilities. But I do not think prescription medications are necessarily the last resort. I also think it can be misleading to characterize ADD medications as "Dangerous Drugs". As someone who has had experience with dangerous drugs in my youth, I can tell you that Concerta is not anything like Cocaine or PCP.
Obviously as with any condition, if someone can achieve the relief they need through lifestyle changes (diet, exercise, recreation, counseling, religion, etc.), this is almost always preferable to medications or surgery. But if the symptoms are causing life-altering problems (losing jobs, divorce, etc.), medications are often required.
I also do not find that ADD medications remove any of the positive aspects of ADD. My creativity and spontaneity are not gone. My ability to listen to my boss for an entire meeting and actually comprehend what he said is really not losing anything. It is no great loss to give up my self-identity as an "airhead space cadet". My medications do not take away my ability to hyperfocus, they just allow me better control as to when I do it. If I go to the bookstore at lunch and see a book that really catches my eye, I write down the name and get it later instead of falling into an unintentional hyperfocus that leaves me in the bookstore for two hours and missing a client conference call.
Not everyone has ADD symptoms that are as pronounced as others. If the negative effects of your ADD are not that bad, maybe you don't really need to do anything. But if they are not that bad, how was another person able to readily identify them in you and why are you even concerned enough to be on this message board?
By all means explore all possibilities for treatment. But please do not suffer needlessly just because of a false stigma regarding prescription medications.
Tothemoon - ADD does not mean you do not have the ability to make good decision, dont ever forget that, or feel like you are less than anyone else. You seem to have a good friend in this doctor who cares deeply for you. Listen to her advice and judge for yourself.
One thing I have found through my life is that loved ones never see us as good enough. They are always commenting on our lack of dress, our poor decision making and poor judgement in choosing partner. I understand the distress it puts on our loved ones to watch us stuff up time and again, but absorbing their negativity and obvious dissatisfaction with our lives is not going to help. But their always trying to FIX US drives me to distraction. ADDers just want to be loved for what they are.
Having ADD means a lot of things, but for me it meant learning to really like myself, in spite of what others dont like about myself, and using my skills to advantage myself to be the best person I can be.
Drugs/No drugs - whatever you choose! - You are still perfect the way you are. Just follow what feels right for you.
Personally I would give the drugs a go and see how it works for you. There is nothing to be afraid of, you always have the choice to stop. Life is full of choices, and learning to accept consequences is just a natural part of life - it is what its all about!
Regards Rae70
I haven't been diagnosed officially. A good friend of the family who has known me since childhood is a doctor. She called me the other day to tell me that she has been wanting to tell me for some time that she is positive I have ADD, and that she wants me to come in on Tuesday to begin the proper diagnosing and treatment. I have to admit, she's right. I didn't know much about it before I looked it up. Descriptions of the symptoms sound more like a laundry list of my traits. I'm glad she told me, I just wish she wouldn't have been afraid to speak up sooner. I do wonder about meds changing my personality, because some of the ADD traits are things I love about myself. I actually like to hyperfocus. But my main question is this: I met a man who is so much like me it's like having a conversation with myself. I have always fallen fast or hars, but never both and never like this. So how do I know if it's just the ADD? And how can I keep from going so fast that I run it into the ground, especially when he is right there with me? By the way, he knows about the ADD and I would swear he has it to. Any help?Hi. I am a Life Coach Expert specializing in helping adults with ADD. Falling in love is often a head over heels experience. This can especially be true when you are impulsive and spontaneous as many adults with ADD are. I advise you to trust your instincts and also to listen to the advice of your family and friends. The time when you are first being diagnosed with ADD is an emotional time, so go slowly. Take the time to really get to know this wonderful man. Time will tell you if he is the right match for you. Also, look at his actions and not just what he says. Is he respectful of you? Does he encourage you?
I would encourage you to get medication for your ADD symptoms and also to seek the support of a coach specializing in adults with ADD. I would be happy to work with you by telephone if you are interested.
Good luck with this new guy!
Sincerely,
Michele Glance Rooney
lifecoachexpert@aol.com
Thanks for the input. I'm sorry it took so long to get back on here, I was a little distracted. I did get the official diagnosis, and just started Strattera (sp?). When I say just started, I mean I literally took the first dose about 2 hours ago. I don't know if this is normal, but I feel like I have taken a stimulant, and I know Straterra isn't one.
About the guy, I can't remember if I mentioned this or not, but I would swear he has this too. I'm thinking that should mean potential disastor, but instead it's great because he has the same aggravating traits I do, so we both look over it pretty easily.
I especially appreciated the comment about not doubting my ability to make decisions. That one was really getting to me. I guess like anything else it's gonna have to be a balance. I've never been good at finding a balance before, but I'm hoping that now that I know where it all comes from I can handle it better.
I would love to hear anyone else's experiences with this and relationships. Can anyone give me any input? I don't want to assume all of my past mistakes are ADD related. I'd like to know what to watch out for.
And BTW. Its love. Slowing the pace will be the hard part. He wants to get married. Scary thing is so do I.
Thanks.
sorry, I forgot to answer the questions about him. Yes, he is beyond respectful. And one of my biggest pet peeves is when actions don't match the words. Not a problem here. That's another one of the great things about us. We both are very open and both believe in expressing how we feel through words and actions. He is a great father, good provider, oh, wow, how to describe him. Well, if I were to have written a list of every little thing I wanted in a man, he would be everything on it plus. We have the same goals, ideals, etc. It's like we look at the world with the same pair of eyes, with just enough separate interest to make it interesting.