Hello Baydenmom. And welcome to the board i cant say i have experience with uncontrolled or unexplained crying our Jude also four dose the tantrum crying and i dont think this is the same thing.
The strict aproach you say you were using was this advised or a tried and proven approach? I ask as we have recently been talking about this on the cry,cry,cry thread on this page. Iwas told that by being more strict with Jude it was affirming our role. that i mean when he starts we lift him out of the situation to somwhere else as if he was in danger and talk to him in a stern firm voice saying that this behaviour is not tollerated anymore, we have to try to do this with out negotiation as this can give him a way of controlling the situation not always eay i can tell you.
It might be worth while talking more to your local health visitor / Phsycologist about whats happening no doubt you already have but sometimes they might need reimforming just to truely understand whats going on.
Hi, I am new with a question.
My 4 yr old was diagnosed with ADHD, and has no obvious other issues. I have read a few posts on here about "fits" and "tempers", but none that really describe my son.
He just cries. Tears running, shoulders shaking, crying crying crying. No anger, no foot stamping or anything like that. Just pure crying. It used to be moderate, but since starting Focalin, it is LITERALLY hours and hours of crying a day. As in, his cartoon finishes, so he bursts into tears and sobs. Same if Daddy goes to work, if he loses a toy, if the sun goes behind a cloud, anything. Its not fake crying either, its real tears and real sobs.
Is this a normal symptom? Anyone else had any expereince with this? I find the only way it can be dealt with is 1-2-3, or by being strict with him. Cuddling or sympathizing makes him worse and makes it last longer.
Can this be helped by meds? We have only been on Focalin for a very short time, and the fact it has got worse makes me think we need to try something else. He is just missing so much LIFE because he is just crying constantly. Going to the park or playing with kids is hopeless because he just cannot cope.
Thanks for any help. I am at a loss here.
IMHO, if he's already depressed, I sure wouldn't try stimulants as the rebound (up and down) causes depression and moodswings. Have no idea what's wrong, but I'd take him to a NeuroPsych or Child Psychiatrist. Any mood disorders or substance abuse on the family tree? Poor little guy sounds really sad, but it's NOT your fault. It's something else. How is his speech? Socializing? How old? I would personally NOT go the regular Psycologist route. We had about the worst diagnostic luck with non-MD therapists of all sorts, including them. The only non-MD therapist who actually tested our son and helped was a NeuroPsych, but Psychiatrists (with the MD) are also better than average in diagnosing. If this were my kid, the first thing I'd do is take him off the stims and try alternatives, then make the appointment to make sure they have the right disorder. Good luck :)OlderMom38862.5840972222[QUOTE=baydenmom]I think that before the Focalin he was just a sensitive kid and the meds have somehow made it 100 times worse. [/QUOTE]
It sounds like the meds are helping him focus on what is bothering him, so ya, I guess they are doing their job!? Hmmm... you can't win!
My son is very sensitive too, always has been. Of course, that has pluses and minuses. If someone is hurting or down, he can totally empathize and say exactly what they need to hear. It works well with adults, but it's not always received well by kids - they just think what he's saying is weird.
[QUOTE=baydenmom]... can certain side effects be a "getting used to it" type deal, and go away as the body adjusts? [/QUOTE]
About the most we tolerated an unwelcome side-effect was about 4 or 5 days, mostly stomach-aches that got worse with each day. That house-cleaning/crying episode I mentioned earlier was a one day thing. I stopped that one immediately, as my instincts were screaming. We finally settled on Adderall XR, and he had major insomnia and loss of appetite (common, I hear) that has gradually gotten better... it's not gone altogether, but it did improve over about 2 months.
Hopefully someone on this board can shed some light on Focalin-specific reactions with their own overly-sensitive kids!
My son did not have the hyperactivity component either, so his situation is a bit different than your son's.
PB
Oh yes, he is seen regularly by a psych and has had all the diagnostic stuff done. I wouldnt have done meds without it.
Scotdaddy, what I mean by "strict approach" is more of an "Honey, there is nothing wrong, please stop crying" than a "Oh honey I know its all so hard lets cuddle for 15 mins". Honestly, he cries so much that if I spent 10 mins with him on the couch every time he cried my other 3 kids would never get fed! lol.
I think that before the Focalin he was just a sensitive kid and the meds have somehow made it 100 times worse. On the plus side, he is much calmer and more "focused" when he isnt crying, playing with toys and so on. The 'hyperactivity' has certainly diminished. But I would actually prefer the old unmedicated son to this one, and I think so would he.
I really appreciate your replies. When all your kids started meds, did they have a few days of getting used to it? I mean, can certain side effects be a "getting used to it" type deal, and go away as the body adjusts?
thanks again!
Hi Baydenmom,
From what you describe, I'd definitely suspect that Focalin is NOT the right med for your son.
I assume your son has had the neuro-psych evaluation that everyone on these boards will tell you is necessary. If not, you should, so you know what you're dealing with and can get the right diagnosis and medication plan. I don't know much about Depression in it's various forms, but the fact that the crying was happening in moderation BEFORE the Focalin would make me think that it's not just the meds, that there's something else going on.
My ADD son was only dx'd just over a year ago at age 11, and for a few reasons I won't go into here, we tried LOTS of different meds. The different side-effects ranged from mild to down-right scary, with the scariest being the day he frantically cleaned the house all day (from a kid who could care less about neatness), then went into an intense crying state, with shaking, sobbing, even retching, that lasted for hours and hours. It scared the bejeebers out of me, and that was the end of meds for awhile! Like you said, trying to comfort him, cuddle or generally sympathize with him just made it worse. He also had been crying sometimes before the dx and meds, but we now know in hindsight that it was a combination of a lot of things (frustration with his ADD and schoolwork, a brutal teacher that was not a good fit, bullying at school, loss of his cat & Grandmother, and probably hormones too).
Good luck in figuring it out, it's a really tough phase getting the right combination of dx and meds. I found these boards extremely helpful and reassuring, so check back often. And most importantly, trust your Mommy instincts!!!
PB