ADD/OCD??? | ADHD Information
To the majority of the people I deal with on a daily basis, I have really got my act together. I manage a fairly small crew at a corrugated board distribution warehouse. I have a very specific way I like things done. ANd pretty much, I guess I can be a bit bossy, because during my day, I notice I am constantly telling other people what to do. I find myself also doing this at home, to my husband. Not in a mean way. I am always as cheerful as can be expected.
But the me I am at home...she's wayyy different. The house is clean...but don't open any doors. If it's closed, leave it that way. I am a hoarder, and I keep silly things, like mail, and other papers, old magazines, brochures, I have boxes and boxes in the attic. ANd I don't know why. I have a series of numbers that I often repeat silently in my head. 5-5 6-6 7-7 8-8 Over and over, and I started grinding my teeth alot during the day while I'm thinking. My husband pointed out I buy groceries by 3's. I cannot just buy one. I have to buy 3. Hubby doesn't even to bother to ask me why anymore..
when we go to the water park, I am anxious to get there before anyone else so we can all have a chair. While my husband and kids go ride rides, I find myself sitting with the lounge chairs all day, fixing the beach towels. Literally, all day. Every time one of my kids messes up the towel I have on each chair, as soon as they get up, I hAVE to fix the towels back. It REALLY bothers me, it's so silly to think, I am so worried about these beach towels. I will put on sunscreen or oil 50 times I bet. I don't leave the chair, so noone will get our seats..because in the back of my mind..I kNow they will..
About 5 years ago, it started to bother me when someone rubbed their hands on my skin. My skin feels like it itches when people touch me. Most people don't realize it, but if you touch me, I will have to scratch it. If someone touches my hands, I will pick at the skin on my fingertip with my nail until the wierd sensation goes away...and funny enough...about 3 times....I obsess in my mind when other people are sick. I constantly am diagnosing myself with some sort of tumor, in my mind of course. I lay awake at night, repeating things that I may have heard, or said that day. But I can't ever put any of the thoughts together.
Now, the way I eat..is the strangest thing. I am Very picky.. I don't eat hamburger meat. Never have. My food, must not touch. Sometimes, I will have 3 or more plates, so nothing touches. I also, only eat one thing at a time. First my fries, won't even open the sandwich yet. Then the sandwich, Then I drink. The sandwich is always a specific way, depending on the chain. I always order the same thing at each restaraunt, and it drives my hubby insane.
Cannot balance a checkbook to save my life, I hide mail I don't want to see. Never answer the phone if I don't know who's calling me. I hear bells ringing often, and find myself checking the front door often, never finding anyone there. I listen to certain songs over and over, repeat. I still must have a safety blanket when I sleep, and my husband very seldom gets to get very close to me. He makes fun, that I'm like a cat, you can try to, and successfully hug me, but it's a guarantee, it aint gonna last for long..I am always first to pull away from someones embrace...please, you guys, give me some ideas about what may be my problem...
I think you should see a pdoc (psychiatrist). Those symptoms are more than personal quirks, and it sounds like they are getting in the way of your ability to enjoy your life. There is no reason for that when you can get help. If you were actually physically ill you would go to the doctor right? It is exactly the same. Pdocs give medicine that fixes your brain chemistry -- like any other kind of medicine. Just my 2 cents. Thank you, I guess this is my first step...sharing, and seeing what all you guys think..
Hi there...Did you ever see the Aviator, with Leonardo DiCaprio? Classic OCD, (maybe some other stuff too, I don't know) These things make me laugh, and I can only do that because we have OCD running in my family, and many of your habits are distrubuted throughout my family, including myself. I'd say you were right on with thinking about OCD as an issue for you. Numbers and counting are very common, as well as skin issues, like you said with cleanliness, touching and germs.
My mom's HUGE into skin cleanliness. (She doesn't like it when I laught at her though...) She is the only soul I know that will wash her hands BEFORE going to the bathroom, as well as after, and then she will only touch ANYTHING in the bathroom with a hand covered with a tissue or paper towel. Now, getting that paper towel when you have to lever the thingie up and down she does with her elbow, unless I'm there with her then it's okie dokie if I touch it to help her. LOL.
Now, most dermatologists will recomend a monthly self-skin exam to check for any new, growing, or recurring lesions or other ickies. I have this ex bf, also classic OCD< that would spend 1/2 hour every freaking night examinig his skin. He had great joy in the fact that I worked for dermatologists and might be able to give him some comfort that his new skin tags were likely not cancer. We actually broke up over a freaking skin issue.
Now for me, just so you know you are not alone..... I count everything. Steps I take mostly, and window panes, and buttons on the upholstered chair, if it can be counted, I do. Call me Count Calico. 
And I grind my jaw too, to the ever present tune that loops in my brain. I"m a compulsive picker, scratcher and plucker too. (Trich) I manage to keep about 1/2 of my lashes and brows. When I get upset, the house is spotless as I clean and straighten, etc, and I cannot tell you how many times I've driven back home to check the curling iron, stove burner, and garage door (which I did manage to leave WIDE OPEN all night long last night....giggling hysterically as I write it). All classic OCD. No meds, just much honesty and laughter about it. I have a bit of the touching thing too, but can breathe through it, and when comfortable with someone, I am really a hugger. My son used to line up all his crayons to put them away. I told him to lighten up and just toss 'em in there. His duffel pack when he packed for camp looked like a Haney's store shelf.
The thing I find most hilarious, is that most OCDers are so compulsive in one way, and so oppositely NOT in another. Like a massive swing the other way, in another area of their lives. LIke my skin concious ex bf, his house was a total pigsty. Go figure.
If you have not seen the Aviator, I highly recommend it. YOU ARE NOT ALONE!
