I think, whoever it was that said let a crying baby cry, ought to be shot. I was raised this way, as were many others. No wonder we are anxious. Our needs may not ever be met, it's our innate programming and imprinting from birth. I will NEVER get my fill of cuddles, EVER. I think what you posted is why. I think this is a very mild form of abuse, we are just trying to teach our little ones to be independent and not self-centered. But, they really need to be dependent and know that their needs will be met, and to be touched and emotionally coddled too in order to live in this world and be confident secure grown-ups, and have more to give than what we need.
So, it's really hard to stop cuddling my kid.
Can one ever get over this? It's an intersting bit.
[QUOTE=leydengs][QUOTE=Peita Pan]On my worse days I tend to want to hurt myself when the thought go too long. You know either with mind altering things or self abusive behaviour, that's at my absolute worse. I hate myself when I get to this point, and everyone else for that matter cos they cant seem to help. Does that make sense?[/QUOTE]
I know exactly what you mean. When I get to that point I cry a lot and I don't answer my phone because I don't want to talk to anyone at all. Once it hits that point I can't get myself to run or leave the house. I just have to wait it out.
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Unfortunately I know exactly too. There are times nothing helps and nothing can stop the torment. It is extremely disturbing. Haven't slept in 3 days. I am finding myself acting out some abusive behaviors as too. Then I feel angry for hurting myself. These obsessive thoughts are not a product of hyperfocusing. Totally different, So far the only thing that has helped was finding someone who has the same horrifying pictures in their head and understands. Still struggling. but i do realize they are not rational thoughts and they are not real. Just want to beat my head until they stop.
[QUOTE=calicorose]CountryGirl, like the new avatar!
What I do is pray. I believe in the "higher power," OK, I am a Christian. Whatever you believe in. Many people with anxiety find comfort in prayer. Being Christian, we learn that we are ultimately not in control. I have to remember that, and when I start obsessiing and worrying, I just release it to God, release everything, because I know that he will take care of everything much better than I ever could myself. Letting go and releasing it. Of control. Us obsessives are control freaks aren't we? I have to really stop myself and remember to pray and just let it go. Sometimes, it's all day long. Or ask others to pray for me or my worries. We don't have to hang on to them.
It just helps me to know that I don't have to worry about things. I remind myself that it does not do any good, or change anything, just increases my blood pressure that's all. We are in control of who has control, and I give mine up! I feel much better......
Hope that helps some CG.
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Used to do that/ think that. I've lost confidence. I can't trust anymore. anyone including myself. If salvation can be lost like some think, then I'm going to hell.
found this so does this mean I can get over it? or no? Emotionally dead is quite a good discription I think.
The development of an obsessional disorder is similar to the development of other types of disorders. Generally speaking, when an infant is denied the presence of a significant other (parent), the baby will innately scream and cry out in order to communicate with a parent. This painful screaming cry is the infant's primal attempt at getting a parent to respond to a real need (the cry is "Mama, I need you"). If there is no parental response, the child will go into extreme shock, as every cell in the body aches for love and attention. Unfortunately, the child eventually stops crying, goes emotionally dead, stops feeling and becomes crazy. Thus begins the escape and retreat into the psyche and the development of a mental disorder. Continual parental unresponsiveness will cause a systematic and methodical closing down and denial of the child's real self. The child is left wondering why someone doesn't come to relieve the pain.