new, with questions | ADHD Information

Wow, thank you all so much. Last night my wife & I were talking
about our son and i mentioned that if there are any truths to the
thought that this could be heredity in anyway then I think there
is a history in my family. To my surprise she agreed. I'm 38,
married 6 years, with 3 kids.

I am sure my Mother has this to some degree. She has
entioned in the past that she thinks she has a learning disability
. She has so many problems with her memory, completing
tasks, etc. She gets very frustrated with herself. She visits family
or freinds, stays 10 minutes and says, "I have to go now". She
never stays anywhere very long, as if she got bored. We have
always said she has a somewhat addictive personality. She
picks one or two things in her life and focuses everything on
them, nothing else. She was an alcoholic for years, now she
waon't take part in a conversation unless it's about church. She
takes everything to the extreme, can't just have a balanced life
or interests.

All I want is a balanced life and to raise my children in that way
as wellI believe my mother may have some form of ADD but not hyper.  We are more hypo.  we become superfocused on things of interest.  We can fall asleep if things are not flying around our heads.  You do not hear as many people that have this kind as the other.  I guess the hyperactive gets more attention.

Dear no1uknow....

I am a successful pharma sales rep. I think I have it too. Things are just so much harder. I am writing to tell you that I lost the title to my car.... dont feel bad, like DeeAnn said, we have some really awesome enviable qualities...

There are some books, Driven to Distraction is one. Read up on this and see if the shoe fits. I just went to a doc and I am 41.  There is much shame involved. I truly believe our brain chemistry is just different, our synapses misfire or fire too quickly... ( I never read the parts of the book that were boring and technical, they were too dull...)
Hang in there...

There are lots of us out here and having the courage to consider it is the first step!!

 

 

No 1,

I forgot this...I believe I could have been much higher up the corporate totem pole... It is harder to retain information. It is REALLY hard to do paperwork or assignments that we see as dull. I too, have been anti meds...I dont like the thought of speed...I tried Straterra... It is not right for me.  It has slowed me down some and has cleared my head...but Im tired. I may try Adderal, an amphed type med, but if it helps me....I will try it. I want to be different. I believe that maybe the meds help you with the behaviors you need to change, then maybe we can get into that habit and go off the meds.... I dont know, but I am game to try anything. I want to get ahead and advance in all areas...and I TRULY feel this has held me back all of my life...

I don't know if I may have had some form of ADD all my life or not. My wife & I have never given much thought to ADHD in general. Most of what we heard in passing is that it's over diagnosed and the meds are over prescribed. We've heard stories of the meds being worse than the disorder, etc.

Then our son was born 4 years ago. His preschool teachers & pediatrician all agree he needs to be tested. Other kids his age watch him run around with a look of shock on their faces. He's impulsive, disruptive, etc. He's being evaluated and I feel good about that.

Anyway, in researching this disorder I find that alot of things in my life are making sense to me now. My family says I was just like my son, an overactive brat. I don't really recall too much hyperactivity but the inattention worries me. I failed 7th, 10th and 12th grade. Going to summer school and night school to graduate. Math was a nightmare to me, skipped as many classes I as I could get away with. My mind wanders constantly, even in the middle of conversation. Someone can be talking to me in a meeting and I am thinking about how the sunset reflects off of a nearby river. I am forgetful and very disorganized. I have trouble finishing projects and unless something really captures my interest then I don't care about it. I'm not advancing in my career, I have no idea where the title to my car is and my life in general has been unorganized.

I have not mentioned this to my wife or anyone else, she and my family would say it is nonsense. I am going to try to organize my life as much as I can with the help of a couple ADD books I have found. My life can benefit from that whether or not I have ADD, I am sure. I am trying to write more things down, use lists, etc.

Does this sound like a ligitimate cause for concern or am I just lazy and forgetful?

I believe you have a legitimate concern. It is widely known that ADD is hereditary. Once your wife looks into ADD more in relation to your son, maybe it would be easier to mention that you feel you may have some symptoms. Educating yourself is the right way. You are not lazy and forgetful, I bet you are very creative and often look at subjects in a different light. Don't forget that even people with ADD have excellent characteristics that some 'normal' people envy! By all means do whatever you can to organize your life, and try not to be so hard on yourself. DeeAnnHi no1uknow,

Have you ever thought about having yourself tested
for adhd? From what you've said, you seem to have
a lot in common with the rest of us. I was diagnosed
with adhd as a young child (really young) and I was
put on ritalin (My parents only recently told me about
this). At that time, not much was known about adhd
and my doctors believed that I would outgrow the
problem. I pretty much coasted through middle and
high school and also did poorly in math (especially
algebra and geometry). When I got to college I had a
really hard time. Every other semester I was on
academic probation and I was struggling to keep my
sanity. I eventually graduated after three attempts. A
few months later I realized that I could no longer
tolerate the way that I was feeling (lack of
concentration, in complete disarray etc.); I couldn't
spend the rest of my life feeling that way. I went to
the doctor and told her that I was falling apart and
that my parents had mentioned that I was adhd as a
child. After looking at my childhood records, she put
me on ritalin and since that day my life has
drastically changed. Within two months of being on
the ritalin, I went back to school to pursue another
degree (I had always hated school because I did so
poorly). I graduated with a 3.706 GPA ( I never
thought that was possible; especially for a business
degree). I am still looking for my "dream job" or at
least a "professional" job in my field and that's ok. I
have been taking ritalin for six years now and I don't
know where I'd be now if I hadn't gone to the doctor
that day. For me, the ritalin has really made a
difference. You owe it to yourself to consider seeing
a doctor about your problem. Who knows, it might
be one of the best things you could ever do for
yourself! As far as adhd books go, there are two that
I have found really helpful. They are, " ADDfriendly
Ways to Organize Your Life " by Dr. Kathleen Nadeau
and " You Mean I"m Not Lazy, Stupid Or Crazy " by
Kate Kelly and Peggy Ramundo. I hope everything
works out for you. Keep me posted. Take care.

Hi everyone,

Before I forget, lol, here is a link to a site with some very interesting information about the causes of ADD/ADHD.  http://www.nomoreadd.com/gaw_attend8.html 

I hear every one of you loud and clear...I'm 50 yo, married with an ADHD diagnosed 12 yo son, and it's like I'm looking in a mirror, except for the hyper part.  I wish we all could have come to this much sooner.  Anyway, what do you guys think about the natural remedies, diet, etc.  Any experiences with that ?

Also, forgive me if I seem intrusive, but my faith has made me realize that I can be helped !  I wouldnt be here if it werent for the Lord.

Thanks everyone,

I have thought about being tested myself but I am not sure how it would effect my job and security clearance. I'm am not willing to take any chances with loosing my clearance or having phsyc evals on my record. I am sure my son inherited this from me. After looking into ADHD, my childhood behavior, etc it is much too obvious.

Hi no1uknow!

In your last post you mentioned that the documentation of adhd might effect your job and your security clearance. I am thinking about grad school and after that going into a field which will probably require a security clearance. Do they really discriminate against people with documented adhd? What about the Americans With Disabilities Act? Please respond, because this could affect my future. Thanks