question about video games | ADHD Information

[QUOTE=oldtimer]I hear obessions are part of aspergers on adhd. [/QUOTE]

Did you mean "and" rather than "on"?

I think there are different kind of obscessions.  With him, it's getting to the highest level - beating the game.  And once he's beaten the game, he wants a new game.  So it's not really obscession with one thing.  He goes on the internet and gets cheat codes, etc.  He's real into it. 

Who knows, maybe he will be a video game designer one day.  I'm sure bill gates had an obscession with computers.

I was told keep this to a minum. My thing is you can make kids do things they don't like to we do it here. it works here! Here both our kids would do tv all day mom also. Music helps calm also. Good fats do to. People will do what they enjoy most! Daniel could  miss school and it would be ok with him. I hear obessions are part of aspergers on adhd.

our child psychologist is VERY antivideo games,he says that 1/2 of them for an ADHD kid gives4 to 5 hours of hyperactivity.he is only allowed 1/2 hour a day,and he is still hyperactive.the psy was worried about him not using his imagination.

he is only 4 so we more or less built  a playground in our garden but for your son i agree the skateboard and bike,i have a friend whose son is 13,no ADHD,and he loves the KNEX sets,he built A WHOLE FERRIS WHEEL.

I also have a story who might make you less worry about it.14 years ago i was an au pair to a mildy autistic 11 year old who only played computers most of the day.he went to a special college and now works with computers and quite successfull with it also.

I can tell you what it does to his brain, it calms him, and I mean that in all seriousness. Video games, computers, things that are one object, one thing to focus on, plus enjoyable, very very calming to the AD/HD brain. Ask anyone in my family where mom goes when she is stressed out, and they will all tell you that it's straight to my computer. It is how I decompress, and is the most affective thing I have found to do that.

So I'm not so sure I would take them away completely, but you definitely want to limit it and encourage him to find other things to do. It can also be a great tool to help if there are any behavior issues....earning more time on it by doing what he's supposed to do.

yes, unfortunately, all the boys do talk about and play video games.  And yes, they are so addicting.  My son's problem is he gets hyperfocused in them, it's hard for him to stop.  We try to do limits but it's so hard to be consistant.  Plus he always gets his homework done.  They must affect his brain somehow.  I do not allow violent games though.

I think the answer is no video games without a friend. 

He is going to a 2 week day camp where he's going to learn how to develop his own video games.  I figure he'll be creative that way and make some similar friends.

 

Taking away all the video games seems pretty severe to me.  Your child may not like having his time on them restricted, but he'll get over it, and if you tell him he'll have even more time taken away when he argues with you about it, then he'll quit arguing--eventually, once you enforce this rule a couple of times. 

My son loves video and computer games, and we have strict rules about them during the school year.  He cannot turn them on, until all homework is completed.  In addition, he goes to tutoring and participates in extracurricular activities, so he usually does not have time to turn the games on Monday thru Thursday.  On the weekends, he can play, if he wants to.  Considering that all of his friends play also, even if I told him he couldn't play here, he could just go to a friend's house and play there. 

I'm wondering if you are having a problem with his playing all the time during the summer, when you think he should be out playing with his friends?  I went through that with my son last summer, my stepsister is currently going through it with her son this summer, and my brother has been through it with both his sons.  You are not alone!  It is a phase, and it will pass.  Interestingly, all of our boys seem to have gone through it around the same ages--twelve and thirteen.  I don't know what that means . 

lillian38908.314212963 We do not have x box or game cube in our home.  We figure they can use a computer for games.  We used to have stricter rules about how much time one spends on a computer, but now that has been loosened up.  I noticed early on in pre school and lower elementary school that my adhd son behaved socially inappropriately if I let him watch too much TV.  He would behave as though the people in the room were not even there (no manners at all basically)  As a teenager he has said that it is a a topic of conversation at school that he is really on the outside of and when he does play at a frriends house, he is a very poor player from lack of experience which is not fun either.  One mom I knew bought a video game for social reasons for her son.  I don't know about all the video games out there but it seems that a lot are pretty violent and my husband and I do not like having violent games or toys in the house.  (Quaker)

It seems appropriate in your case to just establish a limit without arguments.  Part of life is learning about limits.
jfla238908.6890277778MomWI,

I have a box of medhanical stuff for my kids to play with take apart etc. Prhaps your boy might like something like that since he is so mechanical...?

[QUOTE=mellowdancer]I may try.  He actually  has a great imagination.  He used to invent these games with his matchbox cars and they had a whole world in the basement.  Now he's kind of outgrown toys.  I want him to get out more and socialize.  The problem is that his friends, the few he has, they just want to play video games too..I don't even know what "normal" 12 year old boys do on play dates.[/QUOTE]

Ahhh.  You know, I should read an entire thread before I post .  Yep.  This is what I was saying in my previous post.  I don't know why boys this age go through this.  Odd, I tell ya, odd .  To answer your question about what normal boys do on play dates at this age--play video and computer games!!!  Uh, huh. 

Why not try and see? My son has no imagination so if he doesn't have his videogames and if we cut off television too, he doesn't know what to do with himself so he walks around picking things up, smearing the walls with his fingers, jumping up and down, etc. At the very least, it's a test to see if he has ASD behaviors. Kids with Aspergers often don't know how to amuse themselves without outside help as they often lack imagination. Kids with ADHD can have very rich imaginations and can find other things to do without prompts from videogames/television. When I tried to take all electronic away from my son, he literally dismantaled everything in the house. He wasn't being defiant; he did it good-naturedly. Since he didn't know what to do with himself, he'd take apart everything from remote controls to his sister's toys. It was a mess Yes, I done it once. It tooks two weeks with her arguing, yelling, screaming on me but I stayed firm - no TV or comp. I bought her a lot of comics, new toys, cards...take her every day on playground but then - she calmed down. Yes it was better, she become more calm, I didnt need to tell her everything houndred times. Couse she was boring she started to read comics and books with child poetry - so her reading improved so much. But then was time for me to go back to work (I was stay at home mom for a year) so everything fall in water. Why. Couse she stayed at home with my dh and mil and day by day she was on TV and PC all day long again! They would explain me: We couldnt forbiden it to her . If I could do this again I would do it immediatly, but you need full support of your relative!I may try.  He actually  has a great imagination.  He used to invent these games with his matchbox cars and they had a whole world in the basement.  Now he's kind of outgrown toys.  I want him to get out more and socialize.  The problem is that his friends, the few he has, they just want to play video games too..I don't even know what "normal" 12 year old boys do on play dates.

Maybe bicycle or skateboard would be good for him to get him out of house?

My son LOVES his video games and can  play and play all day.  It definitely affects his social behavior.  He doesn't watch TV, just plays gamecube and goes on message boards for games, and plays nintendo DS.

My husband wants to get it all out of the house cause limited him to a time is very hard and causes arguments.

My question is has anybody done that, just take all the electronics way, and if so, has it helped them in any way???????

My grown boys played videogames together at age 12...lol...but they also took bike rides, did sports, swam, spied on girls, went to the movies, and just hung out outside and talked. My ASD son just likes to play videogames. Period. I have to and do kick him out of the house to socialize. He has to "earn" his videogame time by also being "out there" doing other things. After that, I let him veg out--he seems to need it, but he must go out and at least spend two-three hours at the public pool or the Y each day, plus he has summer school from 8:30-1:30. If I didn't do this, he'd do videogames and nothing else, unlike my "typical" kids.