Overwhelmed :’( | ADHD Information

Spidermom, while I think it's great to have a pediatrician to diagnose childhood illnesses like the flu and strep throat and also for referrals to pediatric specialists, I would never trust a ped to make an accurate dx of ADHD.  Our ped is tops and I respect him immensely, but he always refers to neuropsychologists to make dxes of childhood disorders like ADHD. 

I also am not surprised the teacher overlooked your use of the marble system.  Teachers tend to rely on their own methods of discipline.  Furthermore, I strongly believe school discipline should be left at home and home discipline should be left at home.  JMHO.

 

My son is 8 and has been taking meds and doing omega and fish oil. The meds are the biggest help and the rest makes him a little more calm. I see this when we have days without meds. I would be worried about self-esteem. We started with our family doctor and now we see a doctor who all he deals with is children with problem in school and behavioral issues. He is a great help to us dealing with school. Yes you do have a long road ahead. You will have good and bad days. I have gotten alot of help here and with other parents dealing with these issues. My daughter had gone to summer school for a few summers and finally I told them that she was going year round and she needed a break. They were fine with that and I did some reading and math with her. They are in high school now and It is comming together finally. You are his biggest advocate.I found once they were diagnosed the school worked with me more.

Is he required to go to SS?  If not perhaps you can give him a break until you get things figured out with the doctor.  My son takes a stimulant medication as well as Omega3's and magnesium.  What testing are they going to do on your son? The diagnosis for my son was based primarily on the connors forms and then ( by two separate doctors) and then later he took the TOVA ( test of variable attention) on the computer ( not a long process at all)

If it turns out you son is ADHD, are you interested in helping him with medications?

 

Well, I picked my son up today from summer school, and I asked the teacher how his day was (I have been checking every day with the teacher so I can monitor how he's doing.. for those who don't yet know me, my son has not been diagnosed with ADHD, but the teachers are convinced I should be doing all of the tests.  His teacher seemed just totally exasperated with him today.  She talked to me like he was completely out of control - not listening, wouldn't sit down, wouldn't do his work..  I told her that I started the marble system with him, which she completely overlooked.  She seems to not want to even listen to me...  like she "knows" it won't help him.  I have found a pediatrician in my area (right now we only have a family doctor) - but he is away until next week, so I have what I think will be a VERY LONG process ahead of me.. and it's already getting to me!!    I feel such tremendous pressure right now..  I am TRYING to do whatever I can to help my boy, but its like nobody has patience with him or me, and they want something done right away!  I just want what's best for my son.  I am so upset with this teacher today, it just hurts me to see her looking at me and my son like he's such an inconvenience to her.   

I was wondering.. and maybe I should be posting this in the alternatives board.. but if anyone has tried the omega or fish oils or flax to help their children focus a little.  I just want to know if that's something I can safely give him right now until we can start the testing.. if it will help in the meantime?  Or should I just wait?  Thanks for your help..

Spidermom,

Explain to the teacher that the marble system is a positive reinforcment behavior modification program that you are using while you go through diagnosis and the decisions that will follow. It can take time to get an accurate diagnosis, which is so important for your decision making. Ask the teacher to please bear with you and provide 3 or 4 behaviors that she wants to work on at summer school. Make a chart with these behaviors with marble values and have the teacher fill it out for each day with your child. My first intro to such a program was in school where the special ed instructor at the school set this up for my daughter. I liked it, and adopted ogram's marble system to extend that program for the summer and encompass home behavoirs as well. My daughter's teacher was reluctant as well, but soon started seeing positive results so was more helpful with the program.

It is hard to feel like you are doing this alone. Remember you are not alone.

I like vickie's idea. I would that a try. If she resists, perhaps you could suggest that she come up with a reward system herself. I used the marble system for home behavior; when I tried to cross it over into school, it did not work. But since it worked for me, they came up with their own reward ideas.

I wonder if this teacher is just not a good match for your son. I noticed on this board that the teacher can make all the difference. The good thing is, summer is short. Try not to let the teacher stress you out. Maybe you could observe him in class for awhile and see if her comments are really valid. Watching him might help you come up with ideas. 

I'd try a high EPA fish oil (takes up to 3 mos to work) and liquid magnesium.

Is the pediatrician that you are seeing a Behavioral Pediatrician?

Thanks everyone for your help and suggestions.  I've taken them all and will use them as I push forward with this. 

Joemom, yes, his teacher did strongly recommend he go to SS.  I feel sometimes he needs the break.  It's only for the month of July though, so we have that to look forward to.  I definitely wouldn't rule out medications to help my son if he needs them, however, I would much rather try alternative methods first. 

Smallmom, I definitely agree with you regarding the pediatrician.  He will be a source of referral for me.  This is just a starting point for us, and hopefully he can refer me to a neuropsychologist.  I could just go to my doctor for a referral, but he works out of a walk-in clinic, so I figured I would start by getting us a doctor who specializes in children first, and then get referrals from that point. 

Ann, thank you for sharing your story.  It really does help to know we're not alone in this, and that others are really understanding your fears.

Vickie, great idea, and it's great to hear that it worked for you, too!  I made a chart for my son's teacher today.  Hopefully she will agree to work with me on this.  With regards to the teacher not being a good match, that's quite possible.  He does have issues in school, that I do know for a fact.  He's such a different child there as opposed to home.  This afternoon, he made me a story book, complete with story and pictures - all on his own free will.  Yet at school, they have to sit with him to complete the simplest of tasks.  That's not to say he's perfect at home.. if he was, we wouldn't need the marble system.. .. but he sure shows a lot more attention here. 

YES!!!!!  Omega 3 has worked wonders for our son ---age 9.
He has been on it for almost a year.  He is calmer, less impulsive, and concentrates much better.  His last 1/2 of 3rd grade went so much better than the first 1/2.  It takes a couple months to work so don't give up.  We use Nordic Naturals lemon flavor.  He just takes it from a spoon.  It has been wonderful for us.  There is an article in Pervention Mag. right now that says Omega 3 is proven to work on kids with attention issues.
The Omegas have helped my son a little. It seems to help more during the school year in addition to his meds. He is calmer. I recently started using magnesium too so I will see if that along with the Omegas makes a difference before school begins again.