people are disliking my child | ADHD Information

   you know what its like your child doesnt listen well.  You have tell him 5 times before he understands its hard but whats harder for me is people not liking him.  They think hes just really bad or spoiled.  I havent started the meds yet I hope it will helps.  Is this common for parents of children with adhd.IMac38944.5583333333

I know my parents cried rivers of tears over what could help me back in the 70s.  We had no idea I was ADHD but the symptoms were all there.  I was seen as greedy, self-centered, scattered, non-listener, overbearing, etc. etc.  Many parents would not let me play with their kids as they saw me as a bad playmate.

Meds will help.  Make sure to get at least monthly therapy for your child as their are training methods available to teach children new ways to replace the ADHD ways to play, study and generally live with ADHD.

I empathize with both you and your child.  I know my parents went through hell and back to try and make my life the best it could be.  They succeeded.  I thank them often as a 39 year old and they tell me how worth it it was when they see me thriving now.  Your child will thank you for caring and loving when older.

Some kids are like that. They don't seem to understand it the first time. Just keep working on him. Try to talk to him in a nice tone of voice and not sound confrontational. Sometimes if they feel stressed and afraid that they are in trouble, it makes it harder for the info to sink in.

I hope the meds help.

Lemon - I think it's totally common!  I can totally relate to this!  My DD (6.5) has always been almost "overly-friendly" at playgrounds, parks, etc - she will talk to any child and she can be a bit overwhelming as far as being in their space, being loud, etc.  She's just trying to play and be nice, but a lot of kids are taken aback by her (especially those who are shy).  It hurts to see her trying so hard just to say hello and talk with them, when I can see they would prefer that she leave them alone.  Leaving these same places can be a nightmare - have to tell her repeatedly that it's time to go and we often leave with her screaming/crying and me carrying her to the car.  Fun.

It hurts to have other parents look at you like you are a bad mother - even my in-laws for years have made comments here and there about how she needs more discipline and how she has us wrapped around her finger (NOT!)  I guess you can't understand what it's like to have an ADHD child if you don't live it.

So happy to have found this board!

I have been hating people all week because of ignorance.  This week i had it out with some lady at the pool for putting her grubby paws on my child.  My daughter can be annoying but instead of saying something to her nicely or that I the parent was there and was adressing it she chose to shove my girl aside in the pool.  I even got the life guard involved.  My daughter just was not paying attention to where she was going and did not hear her the first time.How dare some stranger man handle your girl, well done on you for doing what you did, proud of you, we should stick up for ourselfs & our kids.

I think the hardest thing for me to accept, more than my son's learning problems, was the fact that the other kids kind of avoid him. I'm hoping that this coming September, between being in therapy for a year, starting medication (we've just discovered he's add and will be on meds for school), and starting a new school (he moves on to the middle school this year) he'll be able to make more friends.

I was watching a video by Richard Lavoie on social skills. He is an expert in teaching disabled kids. He said that in his many years of dealing with parents of learning disabled (including adhd) kids, he has had many parents  in his office in tears. Not once have the tears been over academics - they are always over the child's social skills.

If you haven't seen it already, try to get his 'Living in FAT city' video from your library. It is totally amazing. (FAT stands for Frustration Anxiety Tension)

As far as leaving places and other transitions, when my son was younger I used the beeper on my watch. I would warn him 'in five minutes, when my watch beeps, it's time to go'. I used this for getting dressed, eating, bedtime, bathtime etc. In fact, one time, during a temper tantrum, I told him in 3 minutes when the watch beeps it's time to end the temper tantrum and he did. Thats cool, i will have to try that one!!! This is one of the main reasons why we will be starting meds before he starts K in Sept. He doesnt really see it but I do. Kids can be mean and they are starting to make fun of him and avoid him. My son ADORES playing with other kids and I want him to make good friendships.Yes!!!, I have ppl stare & look ALL the time & when we are out as a family its worse, becoz two of us are disabled in which ppl can see, its hard becoz then when mikey plays-up, or we have to remind him 5 times over, & ppl stare i get more wound up, i sometimes say to them "what you starring at?" or "what you looking at?, im not putting on a show" ppl are so cruel, we get ppl say blatently infront of our faces, "urrrgh, did you see his hands", then g gets upset also, we have'nt had that with the baby yet, i had it once & bit back but g will flip on them!!! literally, no one pics on our kids!!!!