My Shoplifter | ADHD Information
i also agree that you should march them right back to the store. My son did that once he took a pushpop candy and we did not realize it until we got home.. His father took him right back to the store and the manager scared him believe me he never did it again.. yes I agree that you need to take it back. I doubt the manager will call the police. Your son needs a consequence so this won't happen again. I can hardly write this because I'm so dumbfounded, shocked, hurt, sad, whatever. My son took a mouthpiece (the [censored] kind that football players have in their mouths) from Target today. I just caught him with it. When asked "Why?", he only said, "Because I wanted it.." In the old days, I would take him there and have him apologize to the store manager and suffer the embarrassment of it, but this day in time, I'm afraid he would still call the police, so I won't. There's no kind of punishment that works with my son, so I have no idea what to do about it. I'm soooo heartsick....I think you should make him take it back. I don't think they will call the police. I bet it happens all the time, where moms make kids bring back stuff they took from the store. You've got to nip it in the bud. Don't let him get away with it. Good luck!
You should have marched him right back to the store. Seriously, this happens all the time! Usually the managers will scare the bigeebies out of them. If you feel uncomfortable call the manager of the store and ask them what they do before hand. And don't think it is too late to do so.
I totally agree with cr12345. You have to nip it in the bud!
I agree with taking it back to the store. If they call the police, fine. I can't imagine the police pressing charges against a kid for stealing something that is less than twenty dollars, but having the police show up may be a good thing . lillian38957.3003240741Yep, make him take it back. If you want to, call the store first (anonomously) and ask for a manager. Tell him or her what happened and what you want to do. Ask what the store response would be. Ask when that manager is working and then go in and talk to him or her. Make him pay for the mouthpiece out of his own money. Make it as unpleasant as possible and have consequences at home, too. Good luck and stick to your guns.ptgally, thanks so much for giving me a laugh!! I needed it.
DS will be at his therapist's office tomorrow at noon! Maybe he can shake him up!
hahaha.. ok here is a funny. (not really, but in light of the subject mine is not that bad) My son who then was 4 used to bring home things from daycare and preschool all the time. He always had an excuse has to how he got them ect... It was finally too much for me to ignore (and hope he was telling the truth) when he came home with a teachers cell phone. He hid it under his pillow!! When I asked why he took it he just told me he wanted it. (Like it was a toy) I explained that he could not take things that was not his and how it was against the law. The next day he came home from school and says.. Mommy. What son? Look! look! My pockets... They have holes in them. I was like- oh well well.. guess that makes it a bit harder to put things in your pockets huh? He said Yes.. everything falls right out .. see look. hehehe
I was soo fed up with him taking stuff that was not his.. I cut the bottoms out of all his school shorts!! 
Well we have not had that problem anymore. and incase you are wondering about the phone .. I had him return it the next day and say he was sorry. He was not allowed to go outside after school and play with his neighbor friends for 3 days.
devoted, in 6th grade ds followed the instructions of an older kid and pulled down his pants on the bus and pretended to hump the seat.
He was suspended for 3 days. For a while, I dreaded every school day, not knowing what he'd do. It's been a year and a half and he hasn't done it again. Here's hoping that your ds's shoplifting experience is just as short as my ds's public "exposure."
Our son shoplifted a pocket-knife from Target a few months ago. We called
the store security manager and explained the situation and told her we
would be marching him back to the store to return it. We asked her to scare
the sh-- out of him and tell him about the cameras throughout the store
and what could happen if he does it again. She gave him a stern lecture.
Our son was sobered by the experience. We can only hope he learned a
lesson. His therapist told us that shoplifting is quite common with ADHD
kids, as they have such low impulse control.
I agree with the other posters, make your son return the item.IF, they would have caught him on their camera's, the instore fine would have been 250.00. My neighbor works for Target. Might let your son know this.
[QUOTE=terrie]I fifteenth that takin' it back thing. Everyone calls la Policia nowadays--he needs to learn NOW. There is nothing to stop him if he doesn't. And I seriously doubt his life & thrill-seeking traits will improve in a positive direction making friends in juvi. I highly suspect that kids w/parent involvement (enough to the point that the child is brought back to the store for inevitable humiliation & life long shame) will NOT be prosecuted. But if he is he'll likely learn now. I would NOT wait. Lest he experience lifelong humiliation in another area in his future. Also, in my opinion, he needs to know that you're wearin' the ROCKS. He may already have some sort of satisfaction that he shocked/mortified/depressed you on such an easy whim, albeit unintentional. Especially if he's not held accountable, one thing he's definitely learning is he's in control (or can be, of certain situations).Buona fortuna![/QUOTE]
I totally meant to say NOT(yikes)
[QUOTE=devotedtoyou]We had a really good visit with the new therapist. He agreed that my son take back the item and apologize to the manager. We spent an hour with the therapist talking about all of the new behaviors ds has been showing, then we went straight to Target. We met with the manager where ds apologized and returned the item. The manager got security to talk to him.......which helped alot. I really like the new therapist...he does no meds and no testing. He purely and simply TALKS. It's about time...![/QUOTE]
Good deal! I hope he won't do it again now. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you. And glad you had a good visit with the therapist! 
It isn't just ADHD kids. Nope..not at all.
I hope you make him take it back. I've responded to this thread on another site so I wont go into detail much here, but I can't stress enough how he has to learn the consequences. Having you take it, but not taking it back & making him face the punishment is only going to serve to teach him that he can just keep on stealing & mom will cover up for him. Until its returned to the store, you have stolen merchandise in your home. I agree with the others that the police probably won't be called if its handled right. Calling & explaining to the manager beforehand is also a great idea.Darn! My image didnt show so I'll just type you (((hugs))) instead!
Misty2238957.751712963
I fifteenth that takin' it back thing. Everyone calls la Policia nowadays--he needs to learn NOW. There is nothing to stop him if he doesn't. And I seriously doubt his life & thrill-seeking traits will improve in a positive direction making friends in juvi. I highly suspect that kids w/parent involvement (enough to the point that the child is brought back to the store for inevitable humiliation & life long shame) will NOT be prosecuted. But if he is he'll likely learn now. I would NOT wait. Lest he experience lifelong humiliation in another area in his future. Also, in my opinion, he needs to know that you're wearin' the ROCKS. He may already have some sort of satisfaction that he shocked/mortified/depressed you on such an easy whim, albeit unintentional. Especially if he's not held accountable, one thing he's definitely learning is he's in control (or can be, of certain situations).
Buona fortuna!
terrie38958.598900463I agree with every one else. make him take it back and appoligise.Thanks, Becky. I'll make sure he knows it!I know how you feel. My 16 year old son was caught shoplifting this summer at a small convenience store around the corner from my mother's house WHERE HE HAS BEEN 1000s of times with my mother and where they have CAMERAS. The stupid boy was sent to get the paper for my mother and was caught putting 2 magazines in his pants. ( 1 was an adult magazine) The manager called my mother and she called me. I wanted to KILL him! The manager did not want to call the police so we thanked him, paid for the magazines and then threw them away and promised that he would do community service for 1 month by sweeping the area in front of the store every evening. But when hubby and son showed up to begin the manager said there was no need to do it aslong as kid has learned his lesson.
When I asked him why he did it he could not tell me. They just dont think!!!
[QUOTE=Auntie]
It isn't just ADHD kids. Nope..not at all.
[/QUOTE]
I want to clarify here just so there isn't misunderstanding. I should have elaborated in the first place.
I believe there is the chance any child may decide they want something in a store and take it. By any child I mean so called "normal" kids, ADHD kids, whatever. Until they learn a hard lesson kids don't really reason out why they shouldn't take something.
Several years ago, when I was with a bunch of my closer friends, the subject came up about shoplifting because one of their kids had just taken a toy from the toy store. If I remember right, each and every adult admitted they took something that didn't belong to them when they were a kid. In some instances it was swiping something from a playmate. Others from a store. Out of my group of friends I don't think any of them have ADHD.
It has been a while ago but I do know that those that were caught were made by the parents to return what ever they took. I wish I could remember the facts better because now I'm curious if those who didn't get caught were the same ones who admitted they later on shoplifted as teenagers.
Anyway, bottom line. What ever is stolen must to be returned to the rightful owner. Period.
[QUOTE=Auntie]Anyway, bottom line. What ever is stolen must to be returned to the rightful owner. Period.
[/QUOTE]Thats it, there really IS no debate here! Auntie is 100% correct. The child needs to return it, no matter what the consequences. If the cops ARE called, well, better now than YEARS from now when its escalated into stealing cars, or TVs, or whatever.
Auntie-
You've made several important points for parents to remember and I agree with you.