I agree with an evaluation by a neuropsychologist (found at children's and university hospitals). Lack of eye contact (plus hyperactivity) is a red flag for high-functioning autism. You absolutely need to know what you're dealing with so you can put the proper interventions into place.
You might want to check out this website and take the online assessment to see if you're on the right track:
Good luck.
SmallMom38963.6096527778 To be honest, with a history of depression in the family, and his behavior, I would think more is going on than ADHD. A pediatrician does the sniffles, but is usually not very good knowing the various childhood disorders. My recommendation is, before you start any meds, especially stims (which are great for ADHD, but very bad for other disorders) have him assessed by a NeuroPsychologist. They take a lot of time with testing (more than one appointment) and try to get it right, as opposed to a snap diagnosis and pulling out the prescription pad. While he may also have ADHD, he could have a mood disorder or high functioning autism, and the best professional to diagnose everything is a NeuroPsychologist. A private school is often not a good choice for a child with special needs. Good luck. pammar38963.5235185185Hello all. My name is Martie. I am 38 with 4 kids and a husband of 18 years. I was hospitalized last year for Depression severe, recurrent. I was suicidal and part of the reason I was suicidal was that I felt I was a horrible mother. That my kids would be better off without me. I felt like I had no control over my kids (especially Carson and the reason he was so out of control was my fault) or myself.
Carson seemed to really begin this at about age 2. My husband and I always laughed and said "Boys are different than girls" "He is all boy" "He is a little more rambunctious than others but he is normal". Every month, as he grew, so did his rambunction-ness. He can climb the walls, literally. He is constantly in to some sort of trouble. His favorites seem to be climbing on the counters and pouring out the dishwashing liquid, pouring salt and pepper all on the table or floor. He has learned how to open the lock on the refridgerator and he LOVES to try to "softly hatch an egg", which always results in raw egg under the table for me to clean up. He is VERY loving (when he can be still for a few minutes). Hilarious--his sense of humor slays me. And I KNOW he is smart.
By age 3 I put him in a Mother's Day Out program. Thinking he needs more structure than *I* am able to provide. Plus, he can play with other kids. right? Seems not. He was constanly in trouble. Distrupting. I was called at least twice per day--"Carson is in the office. He can't seem to listen or keep still while in Chapel." Chapel was his favorite thing there. He loves to sing. "Carson is kicking his friends. Throwing the toys. Keeping others from resting at nap time." He took 2 naps there. Both times his teacher had to lay down with him and physically keep him laying down for this to happen. I could feel the frusteration from his teacher (who loved him but was at a loss, as I was, for how to handle this).
My husband was against it every time anyone would mention he may have ADHD. He didn't think it was *that* bad...he didn't want him medicated. He just needed more structure. More disipline. More...something. My husband works 60-70 hrs per week. This year he took the week off before school started and the 1st 2 weeks of school--since this year we would have 3 in school. After a few days he turned to me and said 'Is he on CRACK?'...I told Cliff--he is this way EVERY day. One thing that irritates us the most is Carson can't seem to look at us. He just CAN'T. I can give him a simple instruction: "Carson look at me. I need you to sit down now. Now, what did I just say?" his reply? "I dunno. What did you say?" or "you said mind." He can't be still/listen long enough to hear and comprehend us. He can only watch TV if he is CLOSE to it. Otherwise something will distract him.
His 1st 2 weeks of PreK included a Parent/Teacher conference on the 3rd day and one on day #6. His teacher has raised 7 kids (4 boys). She has taught for 25+ years. Yet, she is concerned and confused. She said Carson is very bright--but that he is missing out on teaching time as well as play time. I had to take his shoes (the spiderman, light up wonders that he adores) and replace then with the ugliest/plainest ones imaginable--he can NOT keep his feet still--or stop kicking his teacher. We were hoping that telling him that "Your feet can't seem to be still in the Spiderman ones--so you have to leave them home today--but you can wear these instead" would be incentive enough to keep still--but he just can't be still.
I know you aren't supposed to have favorites as a Parent...but he has a super special place in my heart--and I don't want him to become my least favorite. I don't want to say to myself 'I don't want to be around him'--and I don't want anyone else to feel that way about him either.
I pinned my pediatrician (whom I adore and have had since 1991) against a wall recently and would NOT shut up until he said he believed Carson may be ADHD. Since my pedi doesn't like to diagnose or treat before age 6, I requested a referral to a child phychiatrist--that was on Thursday (Aug 31st). I already feel like a mountain has been lifted off my shoulders--just knowing that help is near--and knowing that you, as a community, can talk me through this.
Do you feel I am on the right track? Is there something I should be doing? I read about the marble thing. We start that tomorrow. Carson resonds well to praise--but it seems I have to lay it on sooooooo thick that Claudia (his 5 year old sister) seems jealous or has to try to "beat" him at being good/helpful--whatever I am praising him for. How can I keep peace there? Thanks in advance for any/all advice. And I appreciate your patience if you read all this.