Anyone live in Northern NJ that has a boy in the 7-year-old range? Because of my son is in a special ed class for his ADHD the parents in my town will not let their kids play with him (they have no idea he has ADHD). He's such a good kid and just loves to play to it makes me sad that people are so shallow. He plays with the other kids on the block but that's it. I would love to have him play with more kids going through the same thing as him.
Let me know!
Have you tried to invite other kids to play at the park or wherever? How do you know these parents are like that - that is just to horrible for words! Are there any children in the special ed class that would want a playdate? I would also talk to the school adjustment counselor, principal, teachers etc. in regards to this. They should be able to help your son and you in some way! I know how heartbreaking this all is. My son is 9 and has been labeled. He is not in special ed, but still has had a real tough time with the social end of things, and the parents are to blame, as well as their kids! I live in a real clicky, gossipy town. Please call the school and ask for them to help you, they couldn't help me, but maybe you will be luckier!
Regards,
Beth
[QUOTE=BETHANN]Have you tried to invite other kids to play at the park or wherever? How do you know these parents are like that - that is just to horrible for words! Are there any children in the special ed class that would want a playdate? I would also talk to the school adjustment counselor, principal, teachers etc. in regards to this. They should be able to help your son and you in some way! I know how heartbreaking this all is. My son is 9 and has been labeled. He is not in special ed, but still has had a real tough time with the social end of things, and the parents are to blame, as well as their kids! I live in a real clicky, gossipy town. Please call the school and ask for them to help you, they couldn't help me, but maybe you will be luckier!
Regards,
Beth
[/QUOTE] I have invited several kids over for playdates and either the parents say no or if they do come over, the playdate is never recipricated. I watch as they play and my son is not doing anything wrong so I just don't understand it. I also live in a very gossipy clicky town and the mothers think it's appauling (they have said this to me) that I have my son in a special ed classroom so they just assume that he he's a crazy stupid kid with issues and do not want their kids to associate with him. I have asked his special ed teacher to have the lunchaids watch to see if he is playing on the playground but what happens is my son likes to run around and play power rangers and he ends up getting into trouble for playing too rough. The teachers don't even like the kids in that class so they pick on him at times as well. The only one that goes to bat for him is the special ed teacher. I'm almost tempeted to move out of the town but the thought of having to go through the entire testing process to get him reclassified worries me. He does play with the kids in the neighborhood but he's always the one getting yelled at because they all have the "My Kid is Perfect" syndrome. It makes me crazy. I am tempted to sign him up for karate but my fear is that he can't pay attention long enough to actually do what they are telling him and he'll get in trouble there too. I've seen it with tee ball and soccer - the coaches get annoyed with him and just shut him out like he doesn't even exist. He was the only kid not invited to the end of the year tee ball party last year at the coaches house. They didn't even give him his trophy. I've left messages several times but they don't return my calls. Of course the coaches are parents so they know he's a "special ed" kid.i'm in NJ....where do u live? maybe u could sign him up for some extra curicular things....karate is great for adhd, i've heard.....i'm NW jersey.....A few people have told me that karate is great but I'm just afraid he'll goof off which is what he usually does with other sports. We are in Cedar Grove, where are you?[QUOTE=BETHANN]This breaks MY heart! Those coaches don't deserve to coach, nor be parents! I would complain to the baseball commissioner, and get his trophey! Also, if he liked baseball, sign him up again, maybe even put him in a baseball camp prior to the spring.
I had my son in karate and depending on the teachers, there are ADHD kids in the class! Find a karate class and talk to the teacher BEFORE signing your son up.
Boy wouldn't the t-ball incident make a great article in your local paper !
But we still need to find something positive for your son, even gymnastics where he allowed to run around, or soccer. My son was not meant for soccer, we had the coach from heck, he would give everybody candy but my son for doing a great job, and my son still cries about that which happened 3 years ago!
Find a sport that is what your son enjoys, but speaking from experience, I would never have lasted with out medication, it really has helped my son!
Beth
[/QUOTE]It's absolutely crazy. If he was out of control and hitting people it would be a different story but his only problem is that he just doesn't listen. As he's getting older it's getting worse so I'm now finding myself getting more interested in medication. Although I'm scared, I'm thinking I don't have a choice. May I ask what kind of medication you use and if your child has had any side effects?
The karate place in my town is very clicky and crowded so I may be better off sending him somewhere else. I have to try speaking with them.
I am shocked at the t-ball thing. Sad to hear that a parent would leave any child out of a year end party is horrible.. My neighborhood is chatty, lots of kids.. with all differnt issues.. Please no one is perfect.. these parents are setting a horrible example for there children.. Check into the karate thing.. most karate places know of the problems with our kids. as I have said it is a great place for my boys.. and they have met other kids with the same interests... [QUOTE=boogadoo1]It's absolutely crazy. If he was out of control and hitting people it would be a different story but his only problem is that he just doesn't listen. As he's getting older it's getting worse so I'm now finding myself getting more interested in medication. Although I'm scared, I'm thinking I don't have a choice. May I ask what kind of medication you use and if your child has had any side effects?
The karate place in my town is very clicky and crowded so I may be better off sending him somewhere else. I have to try speaking with them.
[/QUOTE]
My son wouldn't survie extra curricular activities, they over stimulate him! My son is on concerta and guanfacine (that helps with his over stimulation), we also medicate before sports on the weeknights becaue the morning dose is wearing off. it took a long time to fing the right med and dosage but we use a psychopharmacologist who specializes in medications.
You know when you mention about the clicky karate place in town, I totally would take him out of town maybe the YMCA or something, to meet new kids and start fresh after school, that 's what I did and it helped!!!
Beth
I have a 7.5 yr old son and I live in Ridgewood NJ. My son has 4 friends that he plays with but 3 of the moms rarely reciprocate. He can be a handful and I think they just don't want to be bothered. I still invite them over because my son gets lonely. We started the meds because things got real bad, he was sad because all the kids said he was annoying. He was just too hyper, too talkative etc. We joined soccer and never got our trophy, same thing with baseball, but I know there weren't parties that we weren't invited to. We usually get invited to everything. If you want to get together email me privately.
This breaks MY heart! Those coaches don't deserve to coach, nor be parents! I would complain to the baseball commissioner, and get his trophey! Also, if he liked baseball, sign him up again, maybe even put him in a baseball camp prior to the spring.
I had my son in karate and depending on the teachers, there are ADHD kids in the class! Find a karate class and talk to the teacher BEFORE signing your son up.
Boy wouldn't the t-ball incident make a great article in your local paper !
But we still need to find something positive for your son, even gymnastics where he allowed to run around, or soccer. My son was not meant for soccer, we had the coach from heck, he would give everybody candy but my son for doing a great job, and my son still cries about that which happened 3 years ago!
Find a sport that is what your son enjoys, but speaking from experience, I would never have lasted with out medication, it really has helped my son!
Beth