Is 3yrs old to young to be diagnosed

Kelly,

ADHD, ODD,  Bipolar or whatever label you'd like, at three years of age the approach you take with any child's unacceptable behaviors or challenges will basically be the same.  You'll make sure that the diet is right ensuring that food allergies are eliminated.  You may institute vitamin supplements, but at that age, a doctor should be consulted because little folk are more suseptable to vitamin overdose then you and I.  Meeting with a family therapist is not a bad idea; just to make sure that you and your partner's parenting tools are together and to have an impartial eye on the whole picture.  Medications?  Hold off as long as possible since the 1st five years are the most critical in child development.  Additionally, if it gets to a point where you child's behavior are extreme and you are at wits-end, then consult with a child psychologist and/or neroulogist for an absolute diagnosis.  Your peditration will certainly be supportive but if/when you transition to a real live diagnosis of ADHD coupled with meds.....it will be time to bring experts onto your team.

Hope that helps.

Paul

In reply to Rae - and greetings to all.

Of course, I am a very different parent to the young woman I was when I had my eldest child, over 22 years ago. Far more relaxed and patient -perhaps don't have the energy and stamina I had when I was twenty . Distraction is important in situations thus described- and a routine is also very important too. Josef does seem to crave attention, and have to say having twins is just a coninuous cycle of plate spinning. Josef's twin, is a very ' easy' little girl and it is much easier to be a good parent to an ' easy' and complient child. It is hard work, but would not have it any other way . Bless you all .

Judith UK

Hello everyone. My name is kelly and i have a son who is three and a half years old and i really feel that he is adhd.  I have asked the doctor and she tells me that it is normal active behaviour. I feel it is more.  WE have ups and downs all day long.  WE have cycles of screaming and we have a very hard time getting him to focus and he is just into everything and constantly moving.  I am considering trying a herbal remedy and see if that helps.  What i want to know is he too young to take to a psychologist and have a evaluation.

thanks for any help

kelly

Hello all - greetings from the Uk. I very much sympathise with the lady from New Zealand, and fully recognise her child's behavior as it very much mirrors that of my youngest child, Joe, who is three.What complicates events more is the fact Joe is one of a girl/boy set of twins, the girl twin being very easy and delightful in comparison.Don't get me wrong - I adore them both, but as a parent you just 'know' when something is not quite ' right '. I have three older children too,22,17 and 16, and do not think I can keep putting Joe's behaviour down to the fact  he is ' just a real boy'- and it is exhausting - with the constant trail of destruction and mess- but I do not need to say anything about that - because, you lot will probably already KNOW !!! Replies needed please.best wishes - Judith

Thank you for the post.  I am going to try everything i can before i start any kind of medication.  Our lives are constantly changing due to us being foster parents and we are concerned that is taking a toll on him too.  We are considering giving it up for awhile and see if things change we are also going to try modifying the diet and see what happens there too.  I too just wand him to be happy and it hurts so much to see him upset all the time.  Thanks again

kelly

I totally understand. It does hurt to see your child frustrated all the time. I would watch my daughter go from thing after thing after thing and nothing ever satisfied her. She couldn't stay still long enough to enjoy anything. I am really enjoying watching her have some fun. We still have our bad days, but at least there are some good moments now.  Good luck!

Sincerley,

Natalie

Okay michelle all i can say is WOW!!!!   I have heard horror stories of adhd but man you top the cake. My son is not near that bad thank the Lord.  How do you manage.  I do not want to do medication that is for sure unless i see no other alternative for him (not me) 

I just want him to have a good life and a full life.  I think i am going to get him evaluated but that is all at this point and time. 

Thank you for putting things in perspective for me. 

Kelly

Hello my name is michelle,i am a parent of seven sons. 14,13not with me,12learning problems minor,10adhd on meds not with me,8 adhd on meds,4,and mr3 in november.

So the day with mr three is like this. Wake up 5am runs to kitchen into fridge i hear the squek of door and arise with a leap to my feet, stumble into the kitchen, half awake to late the chair needed a drink of milk, i clean as hes runs away and onto the computer trying to load a toy,i say "get down" he screams at me and clings to the hard drive for dear life,i remove his fingers and he screams and crys,i carry him to his room put him on his bed walk out and shut the door,hes kicking the wall,i ignore, hes out turning tv off and on i remove him and bring him into kitchen its now 5.15 and give him some crayons and paper at table while making breakfast,he makes his mark, and draws on table crayons everywhere, i say clean them up he helps for a second and takes off, not point getting him back hes angry and will bite so i put him in his room and shut door. put crayons away.

swoosh, i hear and yes hes flushing toilet roll,i stand there for afew second and think you need a job to pay for that again. have tried smacking is not sucessful. next a quick list,jumping on counch,tipping out pot plants,rearanging cuboards,pulling tape out of viedos,ripping paper,screaming for fun,playing with oil heater, and now its 6am i have been running around like headless chook. Next others arise mr 3 eyes up his prey and pounces, into their school gear stealing their things,hitting,kicking,acting as if he is being treated unfairly when they wont let him rip their books, putting his weetbix in theirs, pouring shampoo down sink in bathroom cause another kid has forgot to put on lock. Every room in my home has alock so he is not able to trash bedrooms,washouse,bathroom. has asses to loo,kitch,lounge,his room. and now its six thirty,im looking forward to rest of day, their is so much more and this behavior goes on all day. he is not able to help with house work give him 20 seconds and hes off. So we go for lots of walks,and he is in a pram strapped in, its big. we go to the park,shop,in town takes forty minutes,and back. local bush walks,not to a friends no one likes my adhd kids,not to a kindy tried that,they said he was to much, when he blocked loo, rub mass amounts of soap in his eyes and so on. mr 4 goes no problems. So i ask my self what can i do get meds for him now i would love to but wont untill he has an education problem, i guess ill just have to got for lots more walks lol. if you need friend ship or support im here.

he is not to young to find out if he has adhd but just becareful if doctor trys to push meds on to you before you have thought about it and investigated, meds do help some

What i want to know is he too young to take to a psychologist and have a evaluation.

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I think he is Kelly, I think we can keep an eye on our kids and perhaps a journal, but I think any positive diagnosis of ADHD in a child so young would be a guesstimate and not validated by many in the pyschological field.

Judith, have you changed your parenting technique from 22 years ago.  Are you more relaxed regarding discipline.  I am not attacking your parenting technique, just curious about my own situation, because I tend to be a fairly relaxed parent myself, and I think my son knows this and pushes the boundaries constantly.

What you need to do, is separate the ADHD behaviour, from the typical 3 year old behaviours. Do a list.

Work on the behaviours you feel are just him being naughty, and be really tough about it.  Dont Cave. 

Dont tolerate any tantrums, I am 33 and my mum taught me something the other day.  We were at my sisters house minding her kids, and her 2 year old threw a tantrum about not being able to play in a cupboard.

My mother just took his hand, said no we are closing this door now, led him out of the room and said "where is Rosie" and he ran off to the dog and forgot about the cupboard.

1.  She made NO clear to the boy

2. She removed him from the situation

3. She distracted him and gave him something else to focus on.

A very common tactic, worked well for her, he knew who was in control!

I have only one child, so had few means of comparison when my son was young.  However, I noticed from the time he was a little baby that he did not behave the same way as other children when we attended an occasional playgroup.  My realization though didn't come until he was 4.

At 3 yo it was simply not possible to leave my son without 100% supervision and constant provision of stimulation, the one exception being when he watched TV.  I once calculated that for every 1 min. he was unsupervised, it took me 5 min. to repair the damage (during which he was unsupervised of course).  Obviously this is not workable, and the only way to break the cycle was to put him in front of the TV (using it for a babysitter, oh the guilt!!) several times a day in order to catch up.

One day when he was 4 he was invited to a birthday party, at which I could not leave him unattended (all the other parents just dropped their kids off).  After I managed to partially clean up the chocolate mess he had made in this lady's livingroom (all the other kids ate neatly), I was chatting with her and admitted that I did let my son watch TV a couple of times a day because after all, I occasionally needed to use the bathroom or start dinner.  The look on her face said it all.  I looked at my chocolate-covered child and knew he was different.  He is exhausting, but a wonderful, bright, caring child!

i also have a child with severe adhd.  we have had our share of "wild" stories.  my fav is the one when he was 3 and decided to take dady's truck for a drive.  I thank God that he didn't figure out the gears.  That was the day we decided that med's was the right thing to do and it was the right time to do it.  my advise is when your child becomes a danger to himself or some one else, that is the time to put him on meds.  The pros are that the behavior patterns will change BEFORE he starts school.  it's easier to correct when the child is young.

I just want to thank you all for your replys.  It is nice to know there are others out there dealing with the same thing. My son will be startting daycare on monday so i am curious to see how he does there.  I am going back to work (at the daycare) .  Maybe they will see the same thing or if they dont then i know i need to look at what at home is causing the problems.  Thanks again to you all . I appreciate it.

kelly

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