Asked for his first sleepover!! | ADHD Information

Yay!!!  Don't be surprised to get a call at 2 am that he can't sleep, though.  This has happened to my sons and their guests on many occasions!!  I hope he has fun!!My daugher is dying for her first sleep over and is age 7.  I would explain to the parents this is his first time why you are nervous and that they can call you as well if need be.My DS 7, goes to sleep over at my sisters, and grand parents. He did his first non family last month. It was a karate sleep over at for his school. He did well, they know he has adhd, he did get a bit sad, but, was checked on and was a sleep... My son always feels so great when he does stay somewhere... reassure the other parent.. that know matter what time they can call and you'll come get him.. Also let your son know that as well...
My 8 year old son just had his very first sleep over 2 weekends ago.  Like you, I was very worried and expected a phone call sometime during the evening.  when I went to pick him up the next day around lunch time, they said he was very well behaved.  I was so proud of him and he was glad to finally be included in a sleepover.  His sister is always going or having friends over.  I'm glad he finally got a chance.

My 8yo ds has been asked for his first sleepover!!! I have just spent an hour and a bit getting to know the mom of the boy and she seems nice and to share a lot of my opinions. I said he could go Friday - but, I am panicked!

I will go in a bit with him on Friday afternoon, we will take him there late afternoon and fetch him quite early Sat morning and I have their phone numbers, names, etc.  He is really happy about it and I know it will be good for him - but any advice from you guys will be appreciated.

I am not too worried about his behaviour.  He saves the worst of it for me. But he might get homesick. I did tell the mom she could call us anytime if they get too much.  and I will send some familiar things like favourite toys. Maybe it's me that needs the survival advice - (?)

Thanks

Yay!  I bet he has fun!  Let us know how it goes.I'm going to lend him my mobile so he can call home any time (and I can call him) and the mom did say she'd let him phone as well. He's been in this boy's class all year and I've met the mom once or twice.  He hasn't visited there, but they've been friends all year.  The little boy was at our house today and they do get on well.  She seems nice enough, but once my son's teacher said she wasn't a good mom and wouldn't elaborate.  To me the kid is well brought up, friendly and polite. How well have you all known people where your kids have gone to stay?

Children love sleepovers! Once your son has had his first sleep over your worries will ease up. It gives them a good opportunity to socialize and feel like they "fit in" It's normal to worry if you don't know the parents that well but the boy has been in your son's class all year and I'll bet things will be fine. Being allowed to sleep out also gives the child a sense of independence which is a very positive thing. It's a great idea to give your son your cell phone becasue you can communicate with him at any time. To ease your mind, when you drop your son off speak with the parents and thank them for having your son over. This way you will meet them again and feel more comfortable when you leave. Your son will do just fine Let us know how it goes

thanks, that does help - oh yeah, I'm going to go up to this flat and make sure he is settled in before I go ... worry wart me!! The first time you let them go is always scarry, mikey has always gone with who we know. He has sleept at my mums a lots of times also, so he knows he will come back to us, corey-max has had more sleep over's than mikey as mikey has sleep issue's.I think I'm starting to relax a bit about it now. I've told HIM and the mom both (clearly) that he is NOT to go near the pool alone as he can't swim and I have to trust him.  She's reassured me that she doesn't let her kids (or mine) go near the pool alone.  Also he's told his teacher he's going and obviously if she thought it wasn't a good idea she'd let me know, and she hasn't.  So wish us luck!THat's wonderful! I'm sure he'll have so much fun!!

Gutsy wrote:
just that my son is not what you would call the most responsible kid

We all know our children better than anyone but as much as we know them, sometimes  they surprise us and prove us wrong Letting your son go may lead to him feeling good about himself and the message is that you trust him. A feeling of being trusted elevates  self confidence in the child and cultivates the start of independence Feeling like a "big boy" and peer acceptance is crucial for positive emotional development and does wonders for the child's self esteem.

Unless you feel that your child staying at the other child's house would put him in harms way, letting him go is the only way you will know how responsible he can be in a social situation outside of the home

They're divorced, and I've heard talk of a boyfriend. I guess you are right. It's not that I am criticizing her paretning style (who am I to?), just that my son is not what you would call the most responsible kid ... !  So she needs to be. My DH is okay with this, so is my dad, my mom feels like me ... so it's a split vote at teh moment but I think I am starting to relax a bit more. DH is usually a much better judge than me.Well, I feel like this:  we all have different parenting styles and what really matters is how the kids get along. There are things that she may do at her house that you would never do (like make the kids brush their teeth before breakfast...I knew someone who had her kids do this because "only animals eat without brushing their teeth in the morning"), but which are things that will never affect your child in his relationship with the other child. While a spotty attendance record might cause a little envy in your child, it doesn't change how the kids get along. It's a good opportunity to reinforce that people are different and what rolls at your house may not roll at someone else's house, or vice versa.  As long as you feel like the house is safe, a few differences in parenting styles can be a good thing.That does sound strange. She doesn't sound very responsible. Will the father be there as well? Have you met him?

The thing is by no means on. I wish it was with one of his friends that he knows better (and I know better). He has never even been to this kid's house to visit.  I for one would sure as heck have the kid here for a few hours before suggesting a night - I may suggest to the mom that we do this first, at the risk of alienating DS for life as he does so want to go for the night.

Thing is this though. This is the last week of term, I know, and they're not doing much work. But a kid needs to be in school for other reasons. I don't think thjere was anything wrong with him.  Hubby gave them a lift home yesterday and on the way heard the mom tell the kid that he may not go to school the next day as he didn't have a lift.  Not there's anything wrong with him, but he didn't have a lift! Also he left his bag at our place and she also said since he didn't have his bag he wouldn't go. Of course when DH came home I insisted we take the bag round and when the little guy came down to get his bag I asked him if he was going to school tomorrow. He said his mom said now that he had his bag he was going (?) (isn't it our job to get them there??).  I also asked if he had a lift, he said yes, someone was going to take him. So I said okay, but if you can't come right, tell your mom to phone us and we can give you a lift.  I didn't hear anything so assumed all was okay.  But guess what - DS came home today saying his friend wasn't at school. 

We also heard that earlier this year she kept him out of school for a week, and he was at the beach.  What do you all make of it?  What do I do?  My son REALLY wants to go (trust me there are going to be BIG issues if he can't, but that's just something I will have to put up with) and I can't decide if my 'weirdo alert' is kicking in or if it's just normal jitters.

yeah i know - we will do it on Fri in two weeks because the little boy goes to his dad's every alternate weekend and I can only do it on Fridays. But it will be fine.He did :)I'm so happy to hear that your son had fun. Now you can exhale momGreat news!   Errrrr.......now it's your turn to have it at your house........