It must be the week for mis-behavior | ADHD Information

This morning my daughter age 7 woke up crabby refused to get dressed, refused to get out of bed so I dragged her and physically dressed her.  It was like wrestling a baby alligator then the top was not good enough, then the juice cup was not good enough then the juice itself.  She had a total meltdown refused to listen kicking and screaming all the way.  We missed the bus and almost was late for school and at the school she refused to get out of the car.  I did notice her eyes were red and puffy from crying so I called the teacher from my cell phone as a warning.  I was told she gave them a hard time all day when I called.  I did not even mention yet I lost my cool and was screaming at her and threatened to give her christmas presents away.  I was frustrated and not just late for work but for a meeting that I coordinated  being the provider.  I did get saved by another being late as well.

 

   How can I not be a yeller or screamer when she pushes my buttons for when it happens I did say this morning I hated the way she was and tried to add "the behavior".  It is so hard to be the perfect parent and then I felt guilty all day that I am hurting her self esteem.  I love my girl more than anything but lately it is so hard to just enjoy her when she is out of control.  She starts meds again tommorow Ritalin LA 10 mg. 

Oh, what can I say besides you have your work cut out for you.  I've never had to deal with that situation before.  Luckily, dd is happy to get up and get ready for school.....I think I just jinxed myself.  Hopefully, she will be much less irritable on the Ritalin LA.  I must say I'm loving the Tenex (guanfacine).  We've actually been able to reduce the Ritalin LA dosage with Tenex.  She's been without her afternoon "booster" now for 2 days--just not possible before Tenex.  The rebound was horrific.  Now, it is not an issue, it seems....

And I know you are the guru now of positive behavior modification , but does your dd get to pick her own clothes, and pick her own breakfast.  I know around here I don't get a say as to what she wears most days.  I try to give her the power on certain things.  And one other thing, being rushed in the morning doesn't work at all around here.  That is a sure recipe for a meltdown.  We get up super early (6:40) so they can take their time lollygagging a bit.

I am guilty of yelling worse things to my son at times....you just can't help it sometimes when they push you to the brink. I HATE how I get sometimes and feel super guilty over it. We can't be Mrs. Clever all the time ya know! We just can't do it. We are only human and there is not one person out there with an ADHD child that has NEVER lost their cool. Just ain't happenin'!!!! I have a very quick temper and there are times I have to tell myself....DEEP BREATH"S RENEE- DEEP BREATHS Most of the time I just explode though.

Sorry about your bad morning, hope things get better for you.

How well I understand! My daughter who hasn't been diagnosed with anything was about that same age when she refused to go to school. We were only a block away so she walked and I didn't have a car at the time. She stood banging on the door for 15 minutes in the cold and snow. I finally called the principal and asked him for ideas. (I'd known him and his wife for years) and he asked to talk to her. He gave her 10 minutes to be there and she asked me to go with her. He was standing on the front steps with his arms crossed waiting. She looked like a condemned prisoner must feel on his way to the execution but she told me she didn't want me to go clear up there with her, gulped and started walking. After that, she would get up and get ready without any prompting from me.  How well do you know the principal?

Something you can try to keep the fuss of what to wear to a minimum is to choose 2 or 3 outfits the night before and have her choose which to wear the next day. Once she has chosen, unless there is a real problem with something, she has to wear it. That way you both know what she is wearing, and she did have a choice of what to wear so she feels she has some control.

I  would go along with letting her wear whatever she likes as long as it is not a bathing suit or something equally inappropriate.  BTW Jillette I think you are doing an excellent job it is so hard not to yell.  I also am guilty and when I get caught up in the yelling game I try to imagine what I would look like on a hidden camera (the yelling stops).   When do you think the study will allow you to go to the medication group?   It seems to me that the best treatment will be a combo of behavior and meds. 

     Please put my son out of your daughters body and return to home!!!!  I think you have him in disguise!!!!!  My post a few weeks ago was about the same except I pushed my son into the garage and shut the door in his face.  He pushed me to my limit and if I didn't remove him, I was afraid I would hurt him.  YOU ARE NOT ALONE!!!!!!!

     There are days like this and then there will be days that are not so bad.  You can do it!!!!

     Just remember, she is young, confused and in need of your help.  I am sending a big hug your way!!!!!!!!!!!

Thanks everyone she woke this morning all smiley no problems whatsoever.  Today is her first day back on meds so I was a little nervous sending her off due to side effects.  The teachers are going to allow her after each assignment to use to get some water in case of dry mouth.  She is back on Ritalin LA 10 MG she was on it last year.  What  I am also trying to do is teach her about her ADHD so she has more awarness and purchased a book to explain it to her and when we finish it and I find it was useful I will share.

Jillette, let us know how your dd did in school today with her first day back on meds.

Jillett I am glad that  today is better.  Good luck with the meds again.  To combat dry mouth and keep students hydrated, my son's teacher has a bottle of water for each child on their desk.  Each week a different parent donates the water (sports caps only) for the class.  This seems to help the students remain seated and focused on work.

Jillette - DS has our family in a very stressful place right now so I can SOOO relate.  He has been a real nightmare and I know it is a combo of his meds not working anymore and puberty.  It is only Wednesday and I have had to talk with the school all three days.  Monday he got detention, Tuesday he was threatened with detention again for the same thing.  Today he missed the bus, waited almost an hour before he called me.  I was in a meeting with my boss, my boss's boss, and his boss too.  Not a good time to have to rush home to pick him up and take him to school. UGH!

I was able to not yell at him but I think that is only because last night I made DH deal with the kids and I shut myself in another room, read a book, and drank wine.  I was not in the right mental state to deal with DS and knew I would explode if I did not get away from him.  So I was able to recharge myself and deal with him calmly this morning.

I have definitely yelled and worse to him before and am sure he will push me over the edge in the future as well.  I just hope I can keep it to a minimum.  I am glad you are having a better day today!

Becky is a slow turtle in the mornings.  I have to pull her up out of bed.  I have to dress her or else it would not get done.  She likes to dily daly with this or that.  She makes me want to pull my hair out.  That is the worst time of the day for us.  I yell and I know I shouldn't.  But it's so hard when you are trying to get her ready and you have to get yourself ready and get to a job on time.  It's impossible.  Even on meds the mornings are still a huge problem. 

I feel your pain.

Beckysmom39057.4391435185

Both her teachers were out due to personal reasons the special education teacher told me he is putting his father in Hospice (a place for the terminally ill to keep them comfortable until they pass, sad) and her other teachers sibling is having emergency surgery so both were out.  The substitute marked down she had a good day and she reports to me she had a good day the only side effect I see is not much appetite.  I asked her if the medication helped her in school and she said yes.

At least I am definetly not alone.  As for the water bottle I was told she can not have one in school but has permission to after each assignment she can go in the hallway for a drink.

 

How about if you get a note from your daughters medical doctor and submit it to the school stating she needs to drink water because the medication gives her a dry mouth and she needs to stay hyrdrated. Just a thought.

You could have the water bottle put into the IEP so they have to let her have it.

I'm glad she had a good day.

  I have a son that is 9 years old and he has been with out his meds for about 5 weeks now. We are having trouble affording the meds. We had medicaid but by husband got a new job so we make to much for that. We also tried to apply for chip insurance and they said that we make to much for that too. We are having Bill problems just like alot of people and we can't afford health insurance. So it has been tough. He fights with me. He doesn't listen when he is asked to do something. We home scool him and he thinks that because he doesn't have to go to public school that he doesn't have to get going in the mornings. We have a 2year old and he as been mean to him at times. I get upset some times and yell.

So I know what you are going through Jillette. I have got so mad and yelled so loud some times that the neighbors have come over to the house. We just moved to a fourplex and we have someone living in the apartment below us. So it is hard. I have just been praying that God will give me the strength to love him. It is hard. Our 2 year old is so calm and he is so smart. Not that my son is not smart it just takes him a little longer to get things. I now that you are suposto love your children the same but when you have  one child that has something like this it is difficult. I love both of my children. But it is not the same. My 2year old likes to cuddle. My other doesn't. My oldest wants to be part of everything all the time. My 2year old is very independent.  So I just want some advice on how to deal with my son with out the meds. Because I doen't know if I can.

Both my son's have had a melt down in the same week and my oldest is diagnoised with ADHD and my youngest hasn't been yet but we did a basc and we will see what his teacher says I just signed a form where my oldest son's teacher can talk directly to his doctor also and I think that will help too. They kick hit bit pull hair I also have Congenital Hip dysplasia and all my kids no that so they go for my right leg instead of my left. which is very painful They should have a class to help us as parents with outbursts or Meltdowns....I mean because How many of you as parents get reports that The teachers say oh he/she is good here and He hits bites screams and kicks at home and we aren't believed because they don't show those tendences at School? We has parents should have a right to get Trained to do that because I for one don't want to  get hurt I'm not saying I don't scream and Yell I do but don't you get tired of the yelling I for one do. And the parents of non conductdisorder children do not understand what we go through Jillette I also would like to know how the book went with your daughter....Thank you for letting me vent.