Music Lessons

Has any of the parents here signed their ADHD child(ren) up for music lessons? My son is super-musical, but we've delayed lessons until now (age 9.5) because of the attention issue. We don't want him to be overwhelmed, bored, or flighty.  And, even more, we don't want him to quit mid-stream (thereby hurting his self-esteem and wasting tons of our cash.   )    But we do want to introduce him to music, since he seems to be such a natural at it.

Does anyone here have thoughts on the benefits (or the downside) of putting an ADHD kid in extracurricular activities, like music, that require so much self-discipline and practice time?  And is there a cost/benefit trade-off, in your opinion?

Thanks, lesnathan.

IME, karate can help with focus. But my son's karate odyssey was a little strange.  Long story short? We over-did the karate over a two-year period and he finally rebelled. He likes karate and the feeling of accomplishment it gives him, but we, the parents, were overly swayed by the structure of his karate school. We should've put the brakes on and listened to him, rather than the karate instructors/salespeople. My son  told me recently, "Mom, now that I have my black belt, I've decided to retire from karate." What a hoot! But I have to respect his decision.

However, yes.  In my observation, karate helped my son with focus and some other things -- social interactions with other kids, respect for himself, discipline -- and probably some other things that I can't recall, since it's five AM and I'm in the midst of insomnia.

I'll let you know how it goes with the music lessons.  I've signed up for the four-week intro package, just to see how things go, before making a longer-term commitment.

We just found out our 7-year-old son is ADHD couple weeks ago. We have him learned piano since he was five. He kind of resists practicing. However, most of the time he plays well when he practices. And he did well at recitals last couple years. I think play piano makes him concentrate on music. I guess it is something helps him to train his attention. Fortunately, his piano teacher is very nice and doesn't put too much pressure on him. Also she charges very little. We feel good for him to keep doing piano, even we recently realized he is ADHD.

He is also a TaeKwonDo yellow belt, only one belt higher than beginner white belt. He learns TWD at our church. This environment is excellent for him to learn TKD, since they learn discipline, respect, and most important, they put GOD at the first. When he got his yellow belt earlier this month, he felt very happy he made it. He said he like to stay in this TKD class.

Doctors say ADHDs can stay focus long on something they are interested in. I think music is a good one to try.

Just a thought here from an ADD adult.   Great advice about finding the right piaon instructor, being "low pressure", and not bearing down on the practice stuff.  If your child doesn't respond to piano lessons, it might be that piano isn't her instrument (at least not to start with).  It might be the guitar, the violin, the trombone....    Sitting down at the piano to someone with ADD may not feel right, even confining, whereas sitting on the sofa or bed or wherever with the guitar, or walking around experimenting with sounds coming out of a flute may feel wonderful and fun. 

Fun and play.  Key words for folks with ADD.  Hallowell and Ratey point this out in their latest book (Delivered from Distraction) and reading about it, it rings so true.  What we play at, we get better at.  As we get better and better from our "play", our proficiencies get noticed, which builds self-confidence and feeds our desire to do better. 

I think most music teachers aren't into play.  Nor are most parents paying good money for a music teacher's time.  So it's a delicate dance, but well worth the try.  Several tries with several instruments if your child is still interested and curious.  Don't let them think that because they tried piano lessons once and didn't like it that they're not musically inclined.   I think it's good to consider that, in order to play the piano or any instrument well, you need to be able to play with it first. 

[QUOTE=jfla2]Also one that is sensitive to different learning styles and how your son learns in particular.
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I want to expand a bit on styles of learning because altho ds is very talented musically, he struggled greatly with learning to read musical notation and maintaining consistent rhythm.  The teachers most successful in teaching him, were ones that taught to his strengths and were patient and innovative with weaknesses.  Having an excellent ear, it was discovered early on that he could play a piece if he heard the teacher play it.  teachers that built on his strengths and carefully brought in the visual component were successful in also building confidence and bringing out talent.  One teacher brought ds to tears a couple times with her insensitive methods.  We found out late about his low visual processing which explained the early difficulties he had reading notation.  He also has dysgraphia, so he records his compositions and also uses notation software for transcribing his compositions.  He has also has enjoyed dance lessons off and on since preschool. 

With my non adhd son that is hesitant musically, I had him do a couple trial lessons and let him tell what he wanted and make the decision which teacher he wanted.  He was in fifth grade.  He picked a great teacher that slowly encouraged him in reading notation.  He had told the teacher up front that he wanted to learn to play the bass but not read notes.  The teacher said okay and slowly got him to the point of accepting it.

Sorry I've gone on so much about this, but from a teaching point of view this all makes a big difference.

Wish us luck. His first lesson is Saturday.  I'll post and let you all know how it went.  

my mom is a piano teacher and really thinks 8yo ds could have a talent for piano. He likes it but does not have the discipline to keep at it. So this year I've asked her to sit for them when my hubby and i go swimming and just teach him a bit when he is there.  For the same reason my mom doesn't take ANY kid under about age 8, they just don't have the commitment and she wont teach anyone who wont practice.

She takes them from about 9 and has quite a lot of success - maybe just start it with him as a kind of fun thing - and don't push the learning thing until a little later?  I will ask my mom's opinion on it when I see her and get back to you.

Yeah.  The "low-key" part of it I understand.  And, frankly, it's quite a concern for me, which is why I'm pursuing it and paying for it out of my own (pitiably small lol!) paycheck, rather than asking DH to pitch in.

Don't get me wrong, here, but I truly believe that DH is undiagnosed ADD (he does, too, btw, but doesn't see the value in getting outside help for himself.)  At any rate, he's of the hyper-focused type.  I mean really! So it's hard for him to be low key about anything.  Which has served him very well in his career.  But, in his understanding and accomodating the needs of his ADHD son?  Not so much.   So I have to walk as neutral a path as possible between the two of them., who are exactly alike but, at the same time, polar opposites. 

All that said, exactly.  I signed up for one month of music lessons.  Period.  And my son will have a voice in whether and/or how he continues.  No.  He won't be allowed to quit over trivialities or passing set-backs.  But I also won't expect him to practice obsessively and play with the philharmonic next year.    And the up side is that I spent about 15 years taking private lessons, myself, so, in this family, I am the authority.  My husband's hyper-focused mindset will have to take a back seat.

Thanks, gutsy.  It sounds like my instinct to hold off for a while may have been a good one.  We're determined to take this as casually as we can and just see how things develop.   I'm really just trying to expose him to a variety of things, hoping that we'll find an "in" with him -- something to help him keep more focused and motivated.  And I remember how much music lessons added to my life, in so many ways, as a child.  I'd like my son to have that, especially since his large motor skills are a little ... less than perfect.   It's unlikely he'll ever play a competitive team sport.  But playing in an ensemble, band or orchestra can teach a lot of the same life skills, IME.   I want to give him that, if I can.