Meltdown city | ADHD Information

Well, no meltdowns after school today, thank goodness.  She had a friend over (at the same time her sis had a friend over).  She treated her friend terribly during the last part--I'm afraid I let the playdate go on too long by about an hour as the other mom was out doing an errand.  Her little friend has ADHD as well as some other issues, so it's a challenge all the way around!   I wish I could get her into dd's social skills group.....Actually, I did see her mom at the psychologist's office last night (she was bringing in her oldest daughter for counseling).  Is it a small world or what?  Anyway....I tried to plant a little seed that the social group was looking for a few more members....hope she didn't take it the wrong way.  OK, I'm rambling.....Bedtime is always h-ll time.  All I can offer you is a hug and hang in there meltdowns are never fun only stressful. OK, I've endured 3 meltdowns within the last 15 hours.  School started back up yesterday, so I guess I can chalk it up to making the transition, getting up early, etc.  Yesterday after school, she just freaked out.  I had mentioned to her that she was going to a social group meeting with her psychologist (a new thing for her) and she was adamant that she wasn't going.  Anyway, she was able to stabilize after about 20 minutes, then she was happy as a clam and in a good mood.   In fact she was even happy to go to the social group.  Then bedtime came and she was totally out of control.  She would not mind dh at all.  So she ended up losing all her screen time today because of it.  Then when she got up this morning, she started yelling at dh again about something.  I notice these tantrums are happening during transitions.  But she is freaking me out with this Jeckyll and Hyde behavior.

Last year my daughter (age 9 at the time) would melt down constantly. It was because she was stressed at school and any transistion or just telling her "no" would start a full rage. I did several things. When she started the anger, I would tell her that she was expressing her anger in an unacceptable way (it was OK to be angry, just on yell, call names, etc.). I would also tell her that when she got a handle on the anger, we could talk and resolve the issue. Then when she calmed down, I would praise her for getting her anger under control and we would discuss and solve the problem. I rewarded her for handling her anger appropriately as well.

We also worked with the school failure that was stressing her and making her tolerance for transitions worse.

We started using guanfacine (Tenex) in the am and sometimes after school for its calming effect.

She still has some minor issues with her father, but we are getting these in order as well. My husband is great at demanding that the kids "jump" when he says to do something...which percipitates a fight. He is learning to treat them with more respect.