Off meds....on meds...help! | ADHD Information

We went through horrible rages (hitting, kicking, breaking things) with my daughter and had to explore the posibility of bipolar. For her, it turned out the rages were her expression of anxiety she had built up due to failure at school and the worsening relationship she was having with her father and I (bad daily fights over homework). We moved to a positve reinforcement behavior plan, lots of coaching for how to express agner and worked with staying calme and getting her to go to her room for a safe place to be angry and get control of herself before approaching us. We also praised her heavily for any little thing she did that was positive. Thiis helped quite a bit and reduced the rages in number and duration. Then when we got the ADHD diagnosis and got effective treatment for the school failure, things got even better.

Your situation is more complecated, but some of the things we did before meds may be helpful while you are trying to get a more definitive diagnosis and treatment.

We found guanfacine (Tenex) to be the best med for my daughter for the ADHD and ODD issues. The anxiety and depression have cleared up now that she is successfull in school our relationship with her is great,

As Meg has mentioned, there are a couple small but promising studies supporting the use of omegas.

Please take care of yourself through this; you are going through a very rough time and you need to be at your best.

Oh my gosh, I know how you feel! About the not liking him and walking on eggshells. That's my life. I often wonder why/how a CHILD gets to dictate my life - what I do, where I go and how I feel! It's an aweful feeling to think that you don't like your own child - I think it more than I care to admit - but it's understandable. I think that we've all felt like that at one point or another. They make it hard to like them sometimes - alot of the times. Most people don't understand that feeling - how hard it is. It actually hurts!

Anyway, I didn't mean to turn that into a "me" thing - I just wanted you to know that you're not alone in that part! Hang in there! It'll get better!

Right?

we have tried tenex...only dropped his bp so low he just slept. missed dinner and bath.....today he has been a mess. why why why? it's tough as you all know. I just hope that the new docs will have a better insight of jake's dx!! thanks for responding!!goinnutz....thank you for responding. it is nice ,if that is the right word, to know that there are other kids like my jake out there. i have gone over it a gazillion times what did i do with this pregnancy that i didnt do with my first son!!why is he so irritable?? so stinkin mean?? why me????? one day at a time!!!!

I have posted here before and you all have been such a great help. So here I am again! My son is almost 7 and we have been trying ALL the meds out there. The ADHD meds make him worse, Risperdal and Abilify make him angry and the antidepressants make him moody, irritable and defiant!! So we recently tried a wash-out from being on Focalin and Abilify because it was like we werent giving him any meds at all. He actually did somewhat ok...able to redirect easier, slightly calmer........that lasted about 4-5 days and once again all hell broke loose. So the Psychiatrist tried Wellbutrin...nope "demon" kid!! She has always been reluctant to try Geodon or Depakote because of the lab work. So here we are now....trying Depakote. Just started last night. Has anyone had good results with this med? Our Doc has referred us to another Psych. that specializes in Austism/Asp. but I truly feel and so does his Counselor that we are just dealing with a SERIOUS mood disorder. We are also going to see a neurologist at the beginning of next month to do testing on him. We have always known that Jake was "different" but only the last year and half have we found a doc that was willing to refer us for "help"! One minute he is writing on the paper that he loves me and the next, really the very next second....he is kicking his brother. spanking him does not help....he just gets angrier (so do we!!) and he becomes more Defiant. Taking things from him, sitting him on the floor....NOTHING seems to bother him. I love him with all my heart.......but I am starting to not seriously like him. how sad is that?? We cant go out and have a normal family time. We are always walking on egg shells around him. My 11 year old son said last night..mom why cant JAKE just be nice?? I am a school nurse and this one poor mom comes in with bruises and scratches from her 8th grade twins...and her boys are small.(ADHD and other Dx's) I just cant imagine that when my son is that age what capabilites to hurt us will be. He hits us all the time! mean to the animals...just Pray for us! Thanks for letting me ramble. Any suggestions on what has worked for you....I am open ears! Thank you!

I'm sorry and we don't have a mood disorder. Sounds like you all have been through the proverbial wringer! Omega fatty acids are a natural mood stabilizer. They are beneficial for many reasons -- you can read more about them on the Alternatives to Meds section of this board. Our family benefits greatly from them!

jakeszachsmom - I'm new to this whole thing so I'm still at the blame myself and cry all the time stage. Is that a stage? It does get easier, right? Today was a BAD day, so I'm definitly having a "WHY ME!!!!????" day. I don't have another child to compare to, but it's nothing you did. That I do kow! It happens for many different reasons. My case, I'm about 99% sure it's genetic. Not that it makes it any easier. Sometimes I get resentful to mine and my husbands families for passing this lovely trait on down the line! It amazes me that there are so many of us parents who can come together and offer support and be here for one another - a big bunch of strangers - but yet I sit here all day feeling sorry for myself and feeling so very alone even tho I have tons of great friends and family I could talk to but don't cuz most of them won't understand. (wow, that was a mouthful!!) Did that make sense? Hmmm? Anyway, I'm so grateful to have found this sight and all you wonderful people - even if it seems like all I do is complain.

One day at a time, in some cases - one minute at a time!! Hugs to you jakeszachsmom. I'm sorry your having a hard time. Hang in there. Feel free to PM me anytime you want to talk!

[QUOTE=jakeszachsmom]we have tried tenex...only dropped his bp so low he just slept. missed dinner and bath.....today he has been a mess. why why why? it's tough as you all know. I just hope that the new docs will have a better insight of jake's dx!! thanks for responding!![/QUOTE]

I would definetly check into the possibility of bipolar. ADHD meds. are know to make it worse, they exasperatte (spelling?) the bipolar and make it worse.

First they need to treat the bipolar with meds., then they can introduce the ADHD meds. But the bipolar MUST be treated first.

Hang in there, poor thing, and remember, he doesn't have any control on what is happening to him!to both your son and you!

Regards,

Beth

jakeszachsmom
I just want to let you know you are in my thoughts and prayers. I have found that life with a special needs child is both a blessing and a curse, most of the time lately with us a curse. But remember this website is has been such a blessing for me, because if nothing else comes from it at least I can vent and say what I really want to say and know that most everyone here has been there, done that and bought the t-shirt. Here you are allowed to actually speak what you feel and don't have to worry about people looking down on you for it because in one way or another we have all been there. sorry this was so long basically I just wanted to let you know you weren't alone.

goinnutz
It amazes me that there are so many of us parents who can come together and offer support and be here for one another - a big bunch of strangers - but yet I sit here all day feeling sorry for myself and feeling so very alone even tho I have tons of great friends and family I could talk to but don't cuz most of them won't understand. (wow, that was a mouthful!!) Did that make sense? Hmmm? Anyway, I'm so grateful to have found this sight and all you wonderful people - even if it seems like all I do is complain.

I know exactly what you are saying, I have never met any of you, don't even know where most of you are from but I feel like you all are a vital part of me now. You are a group of people I can just lay it all on the table for and I am soooo thankful for that.

My child is also a demon child. I also have had failer with foclin (fine for a few days then bad). I was almost about to give up on him but there was a saving grace (so far). Natural Original Flower Remedies. I know what alot of you are saying right now.. " ya right how can that help a child!" But let me tell you - today he was a totally different child. I give him this stuff because nothing else has worked and had BAD sideaffects. This natural stuff dont and its totally safe for children! He dont know hes taking it. No flavor, taste or smell! Put 2 drops in water and thats it. He is on Sepia, Cina These are by Boiron. 3 tiny little white balls each in water and thats it. I also have him on (by Bach) Gentian (for discouragement), Cherry Plum (for violent behavior) and Sweet Chestnut (for extreme mental and emotional anguish). Visit there website www.bachremedies.com What do you have to loose! Good luck and let me know if you have any questions.

Oh I forgot to tell you see if he has mold allegries. I have him on Mold, Yeast & Dust Relief by bioAllers. Also all natural. I know we have a little mold in here from being shut up for winter.[QUOTE=vickie]

Your situation is more complecated, but some of the things we did before meds may be helpful while you are trying to get a more definitive diagnosis and treatment.

As Meg has mentioned, there are a couple small but promising studies supporting the use of omegas.

Please take care of yourself through this; you are going through a very rough time and you need to be at your best.

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