What would you do??? | ADHD Information

zjmom
"There were actually several on there I've never been told about - exaggerated stories of himself and his family, talks about imaginary friend,"

hi zjmom

my youngest son is like this he as 2 imaginary brothers that are so real to him and exaggerates everything

told his teacher that his dad saved a whale that had become beached

not only dose he tell whopping fibs, he belives what he is saying and thinks that you belive the things he says

he lives in is own little world

and no i dont think you was wrong in asking the teacher who has a family member with asd for a contact name just shows how determined you are to get help for your child

go to your doctor tell them yours and schools concerns for your child and ask for a referal for assesment they cant refuse

good luck

Teachers also have to be really careful what the recommend and what
type of names they pass on to you. There are legal liability issues in
throwing out diagnoses or making suggestions about seeing doctors.
They absolutely can give you a list of behaviors your child is exhibiting,
but they need to be careful on what they say when it comes to what is
going on with your child. (I taught for 4 years) I don't think you are out of
line in wanting specifics from the teacher. Maybe she/he is reluctant to
put anything in writing. Try calling them and asking them to list the 5
most unusual things they have noticed. That might be helpful in this
situation. Good luck to you. I hope you get everything figured out.

[QUOTE=niktch] Try calling them and asking them to list the 5
most unusual things they have noticed. That might be helpful in this
situation. [/QUOTE]

this great question to ask teachers, many a time ive gone into school not really having worked out what to say or ask i going to use this myself as we have a meeting with school soon thanks

I just had parent teachers conferences for my ds and a couple of the teachers expressed what I thought was a great deal of concern about his behavior and recent changes they've seen. I quickly started taking a few notes and asked each one if I emailed them a reminder would they please take a minute to put down these concerns and observations so I'd have something to give his doctor and she'll be getting the whole picture from all of us - 2 seemed very cooperative, but his homeroom teacher seemed to withdraw and said she'd try.

So, I email them all yesterday and today I get back a combined report from all three teachers with a list of observations and what tactics they've used to try and deal with his behaviors - great! Not really. I really wanted there separate comments (which is why I emailed them separately). It was emailed from the homeroom teacher pretty much with all of her comments, but lacked some of the greatest concerns I had from the other 2 teachers - like being very withdrawn when he used to be loud and silly, possible autism (aspergers) characteristics, and substitute teacher seeking out one of them to ask what was wrong with ds because his behavior was so changed and subdued - Maybe I'm wrong, but I think these are legitimate concerns that deserved a little bit of attention on that writeup.

There were actually several on there I've never been told about - exaggerated stories of himself and his family, talks about imaginary friend, hums during class and twists his head and back around "many, many" times a day I didn't mean to look for every possible thing you can pick out to make my son not perfect!!!

Should I just note the other observations myself and send along with their letter, email them back and ask if these are still concerns of theirs? The one teacher who suggested aspergers, I asked in my email if she could find out what kind of dr. her relatives child saw (this is how she noticed signs in ds) and if she could get the name - haven't heard back from her but it's only been a day - was this wrong to ask her?

I just get the feeling the two teachers are willing to cooperate, but the other one acts as if it's too much trouble or the wrong thing may be said maybe - don't really know.

Suggestions anyone? Thanks!

It is easier for some teachers to use a form to guide their input. Asking them to comment on specific areas may help what might seem overwhelming to them. The following is a link to a standard form many doctors use. In addition, you may want to make up a list of side effects of the medication your son is taking, methylphenidate. When we first started using methylphenidate I was provided with a simple side effect sheet of behaviors to look for in evaluating the effectiveness of the drug and dosage. Included on that list might be withdrawn, anxious, nervous habits like picking at nails/hair.

Hope this helps.

http://www.psbmed.com/pdf/teacherEvaluationForm.pdf

jfla239128.6223263889Thanks! Wish I'd have checked on here first before I had them email me!You do have a right to know what is going on so you can try to help your son and in the long run would help them as well. I say school communication is very important they are your eyes when the kids are not with us. you're welcome!

I've never really looked at my son's doctors website. It is really quite good with a lot of resources. I remember before the first appointment there were 50-60 pages of forms to fill out. Quite comprehensive and very different than the first doctor that dx'd him.

mumoftwo -

"told his teacher that his dad saved a whale that had become beached LOL "

Thanks, that got quite a giggle from me - I needed that!

Just want to share an imagination story when ds was in pre-school:

I went to the parent conference and was surprised when the teachers asked if "Stabadon" was ds' middle name or something. Stabadon was ds' imaginary hero character that he told stories about or became sometimes in role playing at home.

Evidently he became Stabadon at school and had the entire school fooled into thinking that was his name! They all called him "Stabadon" When I picked him up and they would say "Good bye, Stabadon" I thought they were just affectionately playing along with him. One day he told them that S had died. He was sad for a period of time but then somehow he resolved it.   maybe he was resurrected...I can't remember..but he still told stories about S for a year afterward.

jfla239130.3804282407Add/adhd and imagination:

Adders often have a special gift of imagination and creativity. They are often the artists, poets, musicians and actors of society.

My dad had the gift of telling wild imaginative stories to us as kids. We never knew what was real and what wasn't. If we asked he always had the same answer, "Oh surrrrre." Even on his deathbed and only spoke a few words every day or so, he answered my question of "Daddy, were the stories you told about Allie and Oily true?"     His answer? "Oh, surrrre."    Still a sense of humor to the end.

Note:   He was probably Adhd and self medicated with coffee.

niktch

Hello I am new to the group and I have a question for you since you said you were a teacher for 4 years, My son is 6 years old in first grade and a few months ago he asked his teacher could he go to the rest room, and she said NO, he then ended up peeing his pants, she asid yes I did tell him no, but he did not insist he needed to go to the bathroon. So in the beginning of the year I had told the 2 teachers he has one in the morning in the and on in the afternoon, I informed them both of his medical issues and that I would love to hear any information about my son they could share during the school year, so when the issue of him peeing his self can up THEY ACTED AS IF THEY KNEW NOTHING!! Even the PRINCIPLE acted as if she knew nothing, when infact I asked fro all day kindergarden for the socialization the year before. She went so far as to lie for the teacher!!! Saying he peepeed on his self during lunch time...Well I had him sit in the office at lunch that week so his food was going in his belly not the trash. So that lie did not work. SO what I am asking is does she have the right to refuse to let him go to the bathroom...it has happed again where he almost pooped in his pants because she keep telling him he can not go or that ha must wai until recess....

I enjoy reading these message boards because it can help bring you back to reality - things I've always admired or enjoyed about my child can easily become a "concern" and something that needs to be "checked out". Last night I was just wondering - "When is there anything left for my child's own personality? Individuality? Why does it seem some things are such cause for concern and if I don't correct this certain behavior, he's bound to be a chronic liar, mentally unstable or just "weird" all his life." Sometimes I think he can be singled out because of his ADHD and classroom behavior that it is just pick, pick, pick, pick, pick at every little movement he makes!

Ok, feel better...where's my caffeine for the morning?

When our DS was in Kindergarten last year, we were getting calls daily about his behavior. We immediately made an appointment with out Pediatrician as I had always had the feeling that DS was "overly active". Our Pediatrician gave us a series of response/surveys for us, his teachers, and any others who we felt had significant interaction with him. This turned out to be quite helpful. The survey also had post surveys to inspect the effectiveness of the Treatment and/or medication. Perhaps your Ped or Psych. has a test that you could have each of them complete. This will make the measurement more objective rather then subjective.

I know that DS became lethargic, subdued and lethargic when his meds first started to kick in after taking them. It was like he were a different person at those times. Also, we noted changes when DS experienced a growth spurt. Any of these concurrent with the behavioral shift?

No none of those are happening right now, I did all of those forms and questions before...The teacher just can not deal with him now that he is acting more like the NON-MEDICATED littleman. She turns his behavior card over on the first warning. I talked to the doc's nurse today, they are upping the patch to 20mg. We will see. I asked about ODD again and she put me off once again. I have made it clear that behavior was a real huge issue...So now what? I live in a small town, and was lucky to get the doc. we have. I am going to have to get really pushy to say the least.

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