I have tried counseling in the past but my son is so quiet and shy when it comes to people he doesnt know that it really didnt do any good. At first it seemed to help but then it was a fight to get him to go. And he told me that she asked how he felt and he didnt know what to say to her.
My son does not talk about his feelings very easily, but he gets angry very easy. And since he doesnt talk very much about his feelings it is sometimes hard to talk to him about adhd.
Thanks for the input and ideas. I will try them. Maybe I am trying to talk to him like an adult and need to put it on his level.
I explained it to Chase that he has always had this knowledge and ability inside his brain, there is just a missing 'bridge'. The meds are the bridge that helps him to apply the knowledge that was always there, just had nowhere to go....What I said to my child when she was 6 was use my wearing glasses is an example glasses help me to see better and the meds help her to listen and focus at school.My son, who is also 9, started asking the same question this year. I was shocked and asked him if "anyone" said anything to him. He must be just getting to that age!
I am very honest with my son. If you think about it, he is adhd for the rest of his life.
I remind him in the morning when things are a little out of control until the medications takes effect and he gets in trouble, that this is why he takes his pills. And how none of this happens once his pills kick in.
I also love the articles about famous people, who my son recognizes, that also have adhd. I tell him he is one of the many special people with adhd and look how successful they are! He loves Thomas Edison and Henry Ford, both of whom are suspected of having it, and I tell him he is just like them.
I remind him of how good his school work is, as well as grades, so he knows that it is effecting all aspects of his life. And you know, I even mention to him that he is not the only one in his class/school/town etc. that has to take these pills. I know that helps him a lot with not feeling so different! Hearing that has helped him a lot with accepting it so far.
He has asked me if he has to take the pills forever, and I tell him YES! And tell him that they will help in him to be a successful adult.
He has accepted that so far. I am sure as he enters the teen years, he will question it again
Try giving him clear examples of how the meds help him- abbymaker's math test example is a great one. Maybe point out how when he doesn't take it he doesn't follow directions (like put your shoes on) but when he's taken it he doesn't have that problem.
If the meds are not working that great then it could be more difficult to point something out. He's probably also thinking that it's not fair for him to have these problems and have to take the meds. And it's not, but it might help to talk with him about it.
Another thing I thought was in regards to bi-polar. My stepsister is bi- polar and whenever she was feeling "good", either manic or just very leveled out on the meds, she would stop taking them. She would say it was because she was better and didn't need them anymore. It could be something similar to this coming in to play, as far as him feeling better (because he's taking the meds) so thinking he shouldn't have to take them/doesn't need them.
I would also recommend counseling, if he's not already seeing some one. It's done a world of good for ds.
Hi...
I know what you mean... my daughter is 8 and on Concerta... she has told me that she does not feel the difference in the meds.... but deep down I think she does.. and she told me that she thinks it does... but very uncertain about it.
The way we it to her about the meds is... some people need glasses to help them see things better.. if they go with out the glasses everything looks fuzzy. Taking the Concerta helps your brain make (thinking, focusing, attention ... whatever) less fuzzy. Using glasses or taking meds is just helping us. No different than someone in a wheel chair helps them move around or someone with hearing aides helps them hear. Big part... it doesn't mean their are less smart or dumb... she has told me that she thinks she is dumb because she goes to resource for reading and math.
One thing I did... she takes math timed tests, I showed her one of the tests she did before being on the medication (didn't do half of it) and then one she did while on the meds. She finished plus had extra time. Just to show her that her brain is able to focus (be less fuzzy).
I hope this helps.
How do you get your child to understand that they have adhd and that they need the meds?
I have 2 sons both with adhd. My 9 yr old has been dx since he was 5 and we have been on and off meds since then. For the past 2 years we have stayed on meds. My 6 yr old was dx when he was almost 5 and we have had a very hard time finding the right med.
Both of my sons are now taking concerta and it is working better than any of the other meds we have tried.
Anyway, my 9 yr old does not understand why he has to take meds and when I try to talk to him about adhd he does not listen. It is like I am talking in a foreign language. He also says that the meds do not help him at school. I dont know if he says that because he doesnt know what it is suppose to help him do. He also has aggression very bad. His dr has also dx him with bipolar and is taking meds for that also.
I just need any suggestions on how to talk to your children and help them understand about having adhd.