Bout to go outta my head | ADHD Information
going to see ERIC CHURCH in concert...
Went to school with his brother and how he is in his band.. He is a country singer if you don't know who he is.. He sings HOW 'BOUT YOU... TWO PINK LINES... GUYS LIKE ME
VERY proud of our hometown Hero.. 
I wish my son was afraid of me - ha, that's sounds mean! But, the kid is so stubborn, he's fearless! Even of daddy.
Enjoy your Saturday night! Any big plans?
[QUOTE=knccarswell]Thank you all so much.. Yeah I know I cause some of the rages because I feel like he is already "hateful towards me" I get angry push it back to him, its like tug of war with behavior/emotions
oh boy do I know what you mean - you just hit the nail on the head! It's soooo hard to try to be nice when you are treated llike sh** everyday!! It's a total tug-of-war!!! I need to go get that book.........
goinnutzz39180.8365972222Goinnutzz and knccarswell,
When you read the book, be prepared for a parenting approach that is going to contradict every parenting rule and discipline rule you've learned over the years. This is a different approach......one that is for kids wired like ours. Ones who are very explosive and inflexible in their thinking.....ones who get "stuck" on an idea and won't bend. When you first read it, you'll think..........'wait a minute....this sounds like I'm just going to let him get away with murder!" But keep your mind open.....these techniques DO work better for these kids!
Okiemom
Thank you all so much.. Yeah I know I cause some of the rages because I feel like he is already "hateful towards me" I get angry push it back to him, its like tug of war with behavior/emotions
I am in process of buying that book online now.. Thank for letting me vent all!!!
I remember feeling the same way you are. What I did was try to acquire more parenting skills to deal with it. Parenting ADHD/ODD children is so much more challenging than regular kids. I remember hearing a quote "ODD is not caused by bad parenting, but there are a million things parents can inadvertently do to make the situation so much worse." The book "The Explosive Child" is a good one to start with. Also, we saw a psychologist for a while and she helped us get through last summer. I also was getting so depressed about the situation that I had to see my doc and get some help. So in our case, we used a multi-pronged attack to deal with the situation.
Good luck!Don't give up on the idea of getting professional help just because you think you saw a "crack pot" the first time. Sometimes it takes interviewing SEVERAL therapists and/or psychologists to find the right fit for you and your son!
BTW....... in my instance, when I went in for help on how to handle my son's behavioral issues....... the therapist DID point out SEVERAL things I was doing wrong which were really fueling the situation and making it worse. So.... while I was not directly CAUSING my son's behavioral rages.....the way I was responding to them was causing them to be WAY worse. In other words, I myself WAS part of the problem!
Is there any bipolar family history??
Also.....the fact that he seems to control these rages with Dad, then freak out with you implies to me that he is manipulating you. This is behavioral. And you would need a behavioral expert to help train you on how to appropriately respond.
I ditto the suggestion to read The Explosive Child! This is a must read for any parent who has children who rage and manipulate.
Okiemom
The Explosive Child is a brilliant book - you really have to alter your thinking on how to approach this kind of child. IT WORKS. What really hit us (no pun intended) after reading it is realizing that our older daughter has always treated our son this way and that's why they have a great relationship! Morale of the story: listen to your kids! The only trick was trying to get the schools to read/understand/listen to the theory.
I just went a bit post-happy - including one about my success with magnesium. Might want to look into it.
Good luck.
I have order the book.. I'm opening for anything any more.. Somethings gotta give right
Goinnutzz-- Get it we'll go through it together.. 
Today he has been very good.. Not having to call him down, he has tried testing me once but I didn't ague I sent him to his room until he felt like he was clam enough to come out and speak to me right.. No 
YET!!
Thanks for the warm welcome e1.. Just nice to speak to people who know what I am going through.. I try to tell people but you know they don't understand because they don't have to go through this..
*Kim*
goinnutzz- I tell my son that I'll give him an extra minute in time out if he refuses to walk. This only works if he has not entirely lost control. If he's out of contol, I grab both wrists, lift them over his head while standing behind him and my other arm goes around his chest. Then I walk/drag/carry him to his room. He's 9 and 62 lbs, so it's getting harder every time, but I'm having to do it less and less frequently. The only thing you have to watch for is the feet- they can still kick backward. But if you do this be sure to tell him that's what you're going to do ahead of time. I've always found my son fights it a little less if he knows it's coming.
How do you get him to go to his room? That's the thing that's making 1-2-3 magic so hard! If I count and then it's time for him to go to his room it turns into an all out battle. "NO!!!!" is his favorite word and if I have to take him to his room, I have to catch him first and then usually get smacked a few times in the proccess. I feel bad for my wonderful hubby - he's on midnights this week and has been woke up many times due to this. Poor guy! I don't know what I'd do without him! He really is the best!!
Since we were talking about the book The Explosive Child above, I thought I'd link to a thread I posted back in January on this book. I kind of summarize it a little.
http://www.adhdnews.com/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=25369& PN=1
Okiemom
jaderock - I have told him that I will add time to his time-out, or that I will talk away a toy, t.v. time or activity if he doesn't go to his room by himself, but there is NO reasoning with him. When he's mad, even if he's not raging, he is so stubborn. It's always my fault and NO is about all he says - other than the yelling that I'm mean and blah blah blah!! I actually didn't realize how unreasonable he is until I wrote that last post.
I have learned the less painful ways to get him to his room - the head can be as bad as the feet when you are behind them :) But I do have to say he is staying in his room now - that's a huge step!
And - I hate this - when he won't go to his room and I have to take him there I have to catch him and you can see the smile trying not to peek thru, but he thinks it's funny! So not funny!!
Where to begin my son is 9 and has been diagnosed with ADHD and ODD*I believe that the term *Aggression ** for almost 5 years. I have cried myself more times than I should.. I'm 27 married with 3 kids...
Yes he has tried to hit me once and I quickly put a stop to that. Recently at school he knocked a girl down and started chocking her. I went to school crying over it and let them paddle him because I will NOT tolerate him hitting ANYONE unless its absolute a have to.
He has been on different meds the whole time We can't seem to find the one thats right for him and if we do we have to change it up after a while and start all over again. His body gets use to the meds so I am at a war with ADHD.
I have tried taking him to talk to someone and the woman was a CRACK pot. She made my son feel like he was a no body and like I couldn't do anything right.
My son wets the bed none stop of a night. This has been going on for over 5 yrs now. This alone gets frustrating. The Dr's keep saying its something more boys go through but I have to deal with ADHD enough I don't wanna stress over this wetting the bed thing.
I had to get put on anti depression pills because I would take my anger out on my husband and daughters. *My youngest tries to test me sometimes because she sees my son doing it..*
He's behavior has come to the point of bothering me at work now. This past time I was suppose to work I couldn't because we have fought all night and all day. My husband was working 2nd shift so it was me and 3 kids by myself. He is back on 1st now and he has taken a lot of the stress off me but I hate doing that because he works 15 hours or more a day then he comes home to us fighting and that re-stresses him.
What do I do? My son is a VERY loving kid and wants to please you but its like POW he snaps and his behavior changes
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He is not at all like this when his dad is awake or when his dad is home. It's always with me. That's why I'm beating myself up over him and how he acts. I do throw my husband up to him a lot because it use to work and I know my husband is tired of being the bad guy. I swear my husband can walk out of the room and my son changes because he knows DAD isn't here right now. I threaten or I punish him and it doesn't phase him any more... 
What's a Mom to do? 
Yeah I know what you mean.. The blah blah blah blah with the hand jesters...
I do have the fear of god in my son when I start counting he tries testing me, but once I stand up or walk to him he takes off running, IF I have to go and chase him he stay in there the length of his age (he is 9 but he stays in there 10 minutes)
But oh if dad speaks ... No running no nothing, yes sir no sir And I guess thats what pisses me off *excuse my language* I fight with him for hours but yet that manly voice and his father tells him he won't chase him if he doesn't do what he asks and his dad has to come he won't like it and I swear my son jumps!!
But me the one who loves on them, hugs and kisses boo boos, helps with work, plays with him... I get jumped on, fought, argued with, everything... I will have a break Saturday night from my kids, first one in 5 months.. BOY I NEED IT!!