Just diagnosed 5 year old | ADHD Information
Recently both of my boys (5 & 8) were diagnosed with ADHD, and the road to the diagnosis was definitely bumpy.
I should start by saying that as a child my husband was diagnosed w/ADD. As parents, I think we fought the idea that they might have it, not wanting to jump to the conclusion, cause it seemed like an "easy" one. We figured, they're boys..and boys will be boys, right???......Ummmm...not exactly..
My 5 year old, is also one of the younger "5's" in his class (started school at 4, Nov. B-day). From the beginning he was having problems here and there..but as the school year has progressed on, it was just getting worse.
He had slight difficulties in Preschool..not listening, talking alot, not a care in the world, what I thought were "normal" for a 3/4 year old. Well...he "graduated" Preschool, and started his year of Kinder. At first, it was the occassional accident (potty), wouldn't pay attention, wouldn't complete his school work at school when given to him. I'm thinking "ok..this is all knew to him..TOTALLY different then the Preschool environment...he just needs time to adjust. Well, the time to adjust turned in to complete frustration. I was getting calls atleast every other week from his teacher that he wasn't "on task", he wasn't able to focus, wouldn't participate in group settings...just didn't seem to care..oblivious to what he was supposed to be doing there. He started having more frequent accidents. My first thought was...attention...my husband and I both work...he's yearning for more attention...The calls about his inattentiveness in class turned to calls to come pick him up, because he was being to disruptive in class. The school psychologist was called to observe him...which took a couple of weeks to get him over there, and I believe his visit lasted about 15 minutes (gotta love our public school system). My husband and I were at our wits end....We met with the teacher, principal, other teachers to see what could be done to help him...and it came down to the point of him being academically on target..socially lacking...we were prepared to hold him back, have him do Kinder over. Then total frustration...when you get a call that your 5 year old is being suspended because he won't listen, or cooperate w/the teacher..arghhhhh!!! It was also getting to the point that they were going to have him go half a day,(kinder is a normal school day at his school), if not take him all the way out, to start fresh next school year.
After speaking to our Pediatrician about my 8yr old, and his diagnosis, the doctor suggested focalin..I explained that, I, as a parent had to explore ALL options before medicating. So we went to a psychologist. After our visits, and the test administered again for both my boys, they were indeed diagnosed with ADHD.
I was TOTALLY against meds..thinking I could handle things...that everything would be fine...started the positive reinforcement thing...rewards, etc. Well, while they worked at home, school was a totally different story. All I could do was look at my children, know the frustration I was going through...and try to imagine how hard it was for them. I went back to my pediatrician...and got the prescription.
It was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made, but one I knew I had to make.
Today was actually the first day they took it (focalin XR 5mg, lowest dose), and I was a nervous wreck. I let the teachers know they were (both) starting it, and made sure they had my cell phone # close at hand. I called the school about midday, leaving a message for the teachers to call me back and let me know how things were going.
I received a call later in the evening from my 5yr olds teacher. She told me that it was a marked improvement! He was attentive, able to focus, complete his work in class, participate in group learning. She said it was like a total different child was in her classroom. That if he continued on the same path, repeating kinder would not be needed.
I know it's only the first day on them, (and if anyone has any insight on this for me PLEASE SHARE!
..am I getting my hopes up to soon??) but that phone call almost brought tears to my eyes. I needed the.....reassurance that I had made the right decision. It was helping..that's what I NEEDED to hear!
In the end, of course, the decision is yours. And it is definitely a decision that should be thought over carefully. I know in my case, I am so glad I didn't let my stubborness and negative ideas of meds get in the way of the decision. Now, all I can do is see how it goes, and hope for the best...so far, so good.
God Luck with your decision....
Thanks I have an appointment at the doctors office as well for Tuesday of next week to start meds. I really don't want to give him meds, but I have decided the worst that is going to happen is I will decide this is not for him. My biggest concern has been addressed with the doctor. I don't want a child that just sits around with no personality. I was really hoping to get him back to the dr sooner for the meds appt, but you take what you can get right. I called on Monday this week and made the appointment. Just as you stated I will probably be making that phone call looking for the same reassurance that I made the correct decision. I just hope its not a battle trying to find something that works. I know he can do what is needed of him and this week has been very hard. They are doing testing all week at school right now and it has been bad because he won't sit in the testing room and do it. He came home the other night and said mommy I'm really trying but I just can't sit there like they want. It broke my heart I just told him I knew and to do the best he could, and hopefully next week we could get him some help.
Yeah...my concern too was that I didn't want a "zombie child". My pedi assured me that it should not happen, and that if we did notice it, to let her know (guess there have been quite a few changes in meds
). The fact that we don't have to give on weekends etc. is a big plus as well. To be honest, my husband and I went through the denial phase, thinking for sure it was the teacher....she just wasn't doing something right...I mean, sure he doesn't listen, loses things, is off in his own little world at home...but isn't that a 5 yr old?? My biggest heartache was the fact that he didn't say anything about his school day...positive or negative...today he was so excited he got an A for the day...I think he told me 3 times!! That's what makes it ALL worth it.
My 5 year old son was diagnosed with ADHD two days ago. Right now I am just very frustrated and at a loss because I don't really have enough information to feel like I am making a good decision. Does anyone have any advice? Right now we don't know if we are making a good choice or a bad choice with meds. I would just love for him to have a normal day at school and not come home and tell me he is stupid and kids make fun of him.
Welcome
All I can honestly say is that my 5 year is on a low dose of med and he is doing and has been doing very well for the past year and 1/2. I've seen him grow up a lot this past year and he is so much happier. Seeing this has convinced me that I made the right choice for him.
I can also speak from the teacher perspective... I've seen many children not treated and they suffer daily. Tears, frustration, anger, etc. My heart bleeds for them.
With all the sources out there no child should have to suffer. We go to the doctor monthly and they have us do a full 4 page survey/questionaire on his prior month at each visit. They also weigh him and ask both he and I questions. He is closely monitored and I feel that he is being carefully monitored by the family too. We also have him in play therapy as our doctor believes that meds should not be the only tool to help. Our doctor also believes in proper nutrition, exercise, and sleeping habits. In other words the whole picture.
Good luck. I know it is scarey but quite honestly you are not the only one that struggles with this whole med or not med situation. You will do what is right for your child. Every child is different.
4myson39184.7999421296My daughter was diagnosed at 3. The psy at the time put her on a low does of Focalin short acting to see if it would help. Her impulsiveness would get her in dagerous situations all the time. My husband st the time was very adamant that she was fine and didn't need meds. So reluctantly I pulled her off. (We were having rebound issues at the time, also) By age 4 1/2 I knew something had to be done. She could not complete her pre-school assignments and once again her impulsiveness was out of control. We went back to the Dr. We have been on a roller coaster ride to find the right meds for her. I think we have reached a point now that we are on the right track. I know what you mean about the teasing. My baby girl would come home and tell me that her classmates would call her a loser and her hair stinks and she was ugly. Kids can be very mean. At the present she is happy and has made some real friendships. I hope you find what works for your son. I wish you the best.We did not know what was wrong with my youngest. The hyperactivity did not bother me because I was hyper and thought that was normal. By the time we got a diagnosis, my youngest was failing school, and had developed anxiety, depression (wanted to die) and defiance. With meds, a behavior plan and an IEP at school, we have seen a remarkable turn around. As and Bs in school, high self esteem, no more anxiety or depression and very little defiance.
For us this was the right decision. Meds as part of a treatment plan is a very personal choice and if you go that route be prepared to go through the trial and error of getting the right med at the right dose. I believe it is worth it, but it can be a difficult journey.
Whatever you decide to do, you are not alone and will find lots of support and help here.
Here are some sites to help with your education on this disorder, the things that can go with it and the ways to deal with it:
http://www.help4adhd.org/en/about/myths
http://www.schwablearning.org/index.asp?WT.srch=1
My 5 year old son was diagnosed today with combined type adhd. But inthe report there is reference to 'borderline range'. I am not comfortable
with medication for him, although he will be starting school in September
and I am thinking about the option about meds for him then. I remember
having similar symptoms as a child and I struggled through school until
about the 4th grade. I was never diagnosed with anything, but I wonder if
my son will be the same way. I have been reading posts on this message
board for a while now and some posts kinda scare me (about medicine
reations and behaviors). I dont know what to expect for the future.
I, too, had to listen to my baby lamenting that "I don't know why you and the teachers think I can do this, mom, I am just too stupid to learn anything!" It broke my heart that he thought that about himself, even though he tested in the gifted range. In his heart and mind, he was stupid.
Once meds were started, he began having academic and social successes at school and at home, and began to repair his self esteem. Now, on an almost daily basis, he relates a tale of some other child that had problems controlling their reactions or containing their anger, and reflects back, saying "Remember mom, when I was like that? Now I can take time to make a good choice, and not explode."
Each time he says something like that, I know that I did the right thing in getting meds for him, and I could kick myself for making him wait until 4th grade, when I knew in my heart that there were problems when he was in kindergarten, I just did not want to face it.
It is good that you know what the problem is, and perhaps all that wil be needed for your child are accommodations by the school and teachers at least until academic content gets more difficult in about grade 3 or 4. At least you now have the diagnosis, and with that, you should be able to get help from the school.
Good luck and welcome to the boards!
Thanks for everyones help. We have started using a behavior approach at this time which is working very well. It is very similar to the marble one. I wish I could say I think this will work at school but I am not sure. I don't know if the teachers have it in them to help me. They haven't been very helpful so far execpt for to complain. I even took the time to look into what they thought was wrong even when I thought it was just his age. He is at least one year younger than all of the kids in his class. Needless to say him being my first child the school was wrong, but now they seem even harder to deal with than before. I am still trying to gather info about meds, so far have heard a lot of good. Doctor even discussed only during school, and him to be off of it for the summer and after school. I just don't know how I feel about him being on meds every day. I don't like meds myself, but it looks like I may have to learn to deal with it if that is what it takes.First of all, the school may not have a choice. They have to make accommodations to help your child under IDEA. Go to the websites that vickie posted and learn your rights. If you are confused (I certainly was!) find out the advocate for your area, and call and ask questions. Mine gave me step by step instructions on what to do to get my son on a 504 plan. He is on honor roll every quarter and it is because of accommodations made by the teachers and the school. Even on meds, things will have to be done, the meds are NOT a cure all, they are more like a crutch, something to help the child to cope, but will not solve all problems. The things that my school does for my son are an extra set of books for at home, frequent email communications between teachers and me, reminders to Chase for long term assignments, checking his planner daily to be sure he writes down assignments......you can taylor the accommodations to your child's unique needs, but if you are not insistent and ask for them, you may not get any accommodations.
Putting our children on a daily med was a difficult decision for all of us, but when you see the positive results, wading throught the side effects is worth it. I raised one ADHDer undiagnosed and unmedicated and I won't do that again. Period. I know how that turned out.
Personally, I do not give my son the ritalin on the weekends, but that is a personal choice. I also plan to stop the stimulant this summer, but keep the guanfacine for his impulsive tendencies. It all depends on if the child feels out of control when un medicated. That can be scary to a child, and if he/she feels that way, it is best to continue the meds year round.
How do I find an advocate for my area? My school has told me they aren't required to give any special accomidations which is the battle I have been fighting at this time. Thanks for mentioning this oneA couple of things to explore in your feelings:
ADHD meds are just glasses for the brain, they help with focus (and other things).
What is it worth to reduce you son's risks of accidents, teen pregnancy, STDs, smoking, substance abuse, school failure, failed relationships and trouble with the law?
Many kids mature out of the need for meds, so they may be a temporary way to ensure success until that time.
I found a page on scwablearning.org that had a map that you could click on your state and a list would come up......unfortunately, I can't find it again
. I do have the number for mine (Ohio) and possibly if you call her, she could tell you where to find yours. PM me and I will give you the number that I have.....Advocacy:
Info from wrightslaw.com:
http://www.wrightslaw.com/articles.htm
Chadd has a professional directory that has advocates (or check with a local chadd group):
http://www.chadd.org/Content/CHADD/Support/ProfessionalDirec tory/default.htm
You are worth your weight in gold, vickie!!!
vickie on that note he actually ate lunch today which the dr said he wouldn't :), he also hasn't been sick to his stomach as they had said to expect the first few days. I guess the true test comes tonight to see if they were right or wrong about sleep. If so they already gave us the cure for inability to sleep. Thanks so much for everyones help that has been through this. My son's not diagnosed or on meds yet...but when we give him the litany of alternative meds, he's said its to help him not be crazy. Talk about sad. I've told him he's not crazy. I have no idea where he picked up that term. Chase's teacher reported no change with Chase on his first day of meds, but when he came home, it was with only one page of homework (unheard of!!) and he sat right down and completed it...(ditto!!). So, don't lose heart, it just may be that it is not a large enough change to be noticed in a classroom full of children..as you up the dose the differences will be more pronounced to the teacher and everyone else....and it is best to move up to the dose a little at a time to help the body ease into the med without as much shock to the system."Luckily I haven't had any problem with having them taking it (as far as the whole stigma thing). It broke my heart when my 5 yr old said "Is it to help me be good?" 
. "
The next time the subject comes up, tell your son that the medicine is just like "glasses for his brain". Just like glasses help the eyes work more efficiently, the medicine helps the brain work better.....I tell Chase (who hinted that the med made him smarter at the beginning) that the knowledge was always there, the medicine just helps him to access it, where before he couldn"t.
The doc prescribed Focalin XR for both my boys (8 and 5). My 8 year old is able to swallow the pill now, which he is very proud of. (His first try he couldn't get it down, and we resorted to applesauce. The second time he was able to swallow with milk, and now he is fine with water.)
For the 5year old, we open up the pill and sprinkle it on a tablespoon of applesauce, and then I give him a "chaser" of more applesauce, to make sure all the beads went down.
Luckily I haven't had any problem with having them taking it (as far as the whole stigma thing). It broke my heart when my 5 yr old said "Is it to help me be good?" 
.
We explained that it was like a vitamin...medicine to help them in school. That it's just a little boost to help them focus and remember things, cause they have so much info in their little minds, that it helps sort it out...
arv99t,
Do not let the lack of response at low dose get you down. Most people do not respond to the low starting doses, but starting low elimiates or reduces side effects so is standard practice. In this phase, look for the lack of side effects; efficacy will come with a higher dose.
We went for Dr visit today we are starting meds in the morning. I am hoping for the best but know this is going to be trial and error but hopefully I will get some sign even if it is small that I did something right :)
Well just talked to the teacher and so far no change today. I was at least hoping for something even if very small. I was just hoping for a small sign of knowing I made a good decision. Now I'm doubting myself all over again. I know this is going to be trial and error but I just wanted some sign that I made a good choice.The meds when sprinkled can taste bitter (as reported from my kids). That is still how the oldest takes it because she cannot swallow the capsule. She preffers to just put the beads on a spoon and put them in her mouth, chased by lots of water. The taste and texture of the beads can take some getting used to along with the unknown of taking medicine and the whole issue of there being a disorder.
I would not use anything that needs chewing to put the meds in, because the beads cannot be chewed. They would then release a larger dose all at once and not as much for later.
Just gave the first dose and it was a battle. I don't know if it was fear of the unknown or what. I have talked to him about everything and let him help make all decisions. I thought this would help him understand and take the meds pretty easy. I was wrong there. Any advice on what I can do to make him not be so afraid to take this. We broke the pill apaprt and put it in pudding which he picked out. Maybe this is just something he will get used to with time. I do think we are going to try applesauce tomorrow since it isn't as thick as the pudding.Applesauce worked for my ds. My doc selected focalin xr with my 5 year old because it was easier to take. You can break it apart and sprinkle. Lately with a lot of coaxing I've been able to give it to him as a whole pill. A little swallowing issues but overall we're getting there. I don't force it though as far as the whole pill goes.
other suggestions for you...
peanut butter sandwich with jelly or jelly sandwich
oatmeal, or yogurt
I always let him pick from a couple of items.
arv99t,
We are right here with you through this.