I have alwasy felt different. My mom says I was difficult and always said she hoped I had a child just like me. When I was 22, I read an article about ADHD in adults. I remember telling someone half-jokingly "Oh, no, I think I have ADHD!" to which he responded "No sh-t!" But I have always coped well. Am very smart, did great in school, I am good at pleasing people but worry too much about how I am perceived my others. I am a procrastinator and am disorganized (but outwardly neat), I find new interests and immerse myself in them to the point of obsession but have learned to hide it from others. I have always just thought I made it this far, I'll be fine.
Fast forward to having my oldest son and my personality clone. He is obsessive, diorganized, and impulsive (but he can't hide his like I can mine. of course he is only6 now). He is very hyperactive. After many problems at school including a suspension from kindergarten, we had him tested and learned he has ADHD. I know there is a strong hereditary link and I am sure this came from me.
My problem is I can't relate to him. I feel very guilty. I want to help him and I feel like I of all people should be able to understand and able to help him. But I get so overwhelmed by him (and our 2 other kids) that I just shut down, or get angry and yell at him (this has been better with meds b/c he doesn't frustrate me when he is on meds). It hurts that I have to medicate him to deal with him and I know how he feels, but I am just struggling. I am wondering if maybe I should be formally tested and if starting meds myself will help me with him.
I have never felt like my perceived "problem" has held me back before. I have always excelled in everything I have done. I want to be a great mom to him, I think of homeschooling him but know I am not organized enough and don't have the patience for it and I am thinking maybe I should explore meds?
I am curious if other poeple have dealt with this issue and if medication has or has not worked for you?
I was dx'ed with adhd after my son was last year. I had former been dx'ed with anxiety and depression- amazingly enough, the panic attacks went away after my son started meds.
After reading a lot about adhd I started to realize that adhd was probably the underlying cause of my depression, but before I'd even said to anything about it to my husband he told me that I had it- read me part of a chapter of a book about adhd that may as well have been written about me.
I went to my gp for a referal and I explained about my son being dx'ed and and the whole situation. The he tells me that he also works out of the largest mental health facility in our area, is very familiar with adhd, along with many other disorders because of this, and felt totally comfortable managing meds for it, as he is very famliar with them. I knew he was only in the office on this side of town half the week, but I had no idea that where he was the other half!
Being on the right meds has helped enormously in dealing with my son's behavior- I'm more organized so I can help him to be more organized, and I'm also more patient and less stressed.