Single Mother Needs Help | ADHD Information
I am a divorced parent struggling with an ADHD child. Two years ago we checked him into a children's hospital after being so strung out on medication that was wrong and to make sure we were dealing with the right diagnosis. Since that time, things have gotten better although nothing close to anything normal.
Recently, I won the worst parent in the world award when an uptick in outburst and anger (mostly disrespectful words) finally got the best of me. All I wanted was for my son to do was to put some towels into an empty washing machine that he got out.
His mouth went into action and I snapped. I told him to shut his mouth. He had something else nasty to say. I slapped him and said, "Shut your mouth and put the laundry in the machine." Several rounds later and a belt... he refused, threatened to call 911 and have me arrested. Not to mention my oven door has been shattered and my bathroom door is completely torn off the hinges. It was a horrible day and I know he will be scarred by this for his entire life.
I went to the doctor immediately to discuss my struggles and he placed him on Depokte (sp?) along with Clondine and Concerta. In addition, I have scheduled an appointment with a therapist to help us uncover the issues of definance. The anger was so deep that day that I fear his teenage years.
I'm considering the next phase as I am exhausted. I don't want to kill the kind spirit that is evident from time to time. However, every thing is a battle even using Magic 1-2-3.
He enters 4th grade and I wonder is there a boarding school or a program that can just help me over this hump. I know there is a need for behavior modification but outside of a therapist, I am wondering if there is a summer program or something else that would help.
Now, before mentioning a camp that costs ,000 + for a week, I am specifically looking for something that is more cost effective, possibly covered by insurance or a means for financial assistance.
Help!!
You need to find the closest ADHD clinic and attend some parenting skills specifically for parents of ADHD children. I think you need to start with you, not him.
If you have a local children's hospital or university with a child development department, they may have parenting challenging chilldren classes, social skills classes, and other services you can take advantage of. They may also have suggestions for good summer programs.I can't believe that this is happening TO a boy who is only in the 3rd grade.
I agree, it needs to start with you, his mother. I don't think you need to send him to a boarding school, I think you need to spend some time with him.
He probably isn't on the right medication for HIM, poor thing
Please control YOUR temper with him. He is not going to respond the way you want him to, he has ADHD. He also may not be as defiant as you feel he is.
Definetely call your pediatrician, or Children's hospital for some parenting classes and how to handle ADHD children.
I would start with a re-evaluation to see if he has any other co-existing conditions. He may be angry, but it could be over so many things, is he angry over the divorce, how is school going for him, etc.
Definetely get him AND you some help, but don't send him away!
Hang in there, you are doing the right thing by looking for help!!
to both you and your son!!
Please post how things are progressing!! We are here for you!
There are quite a few summer programs available. They are usually as you say pretty expensive. I would start with your insurance company, they can usually give you list of covered programs. A lot of places that do social skills groups will do summer programs and it is a day camp for 3-6 weeks and they are terrific programs. Your psychiatrist should also be able to get you a list of these kinds of programs.
The parenting classes are a great way to help you and seeing a therapist yourself to help you handle your anger. It is quite the challenge and good for you for knowing you need help getting over this.