The latest drama | ADHD Information

Does she talk to any counselor? It may help  her having some one to talk to that she can learn how to sort out her feelings. If she has an impartial party helping her. She probably feels very torn too. She loves you and secure enough to let all her anger out on you. Her father does not help in any shape or fashion when it comes to the Doctor or meds. He does not think they are necessary and that I give them to her because I can't discipline her. She is diagnosed as ADHD combine, ODD, GAD, and OCD. Her dad thinks I am crazy and incapable of parenting properly when in actuality it is him that has no clue as to what her real needs are. My daughter sees a psychiatrist and I have mention counseling and we were set for testing (IQ and learning disorders) before the insurance problems. Now that she has the insurance again I can reschedule that. She will start seeing the psychotherapist once we get testing done. As far as help from my family I have none. My mom is paralyzed from an accident two years ago and besides that I am the blacksheep in the family. My children are bi-racial and there have been a lot of hurt and pain in that area as well. Sometimes I just want to move away so I can be anonymous. You know? Where the only people I would have to give to would be my children. Being a single mom isn't easy on any level. Having a special needs child isn't easy either. It really is tough dealing with all of that and then the demands of trying to help with my mom. I have the caretaker role in the family. You know the one that is always giving and gets the worst treatment. I daydream that if I were to move at least I could be happy with the location (beach). Maybe I could find peace. I don't know maybe I am thinking irrationally. If she can't talk to a counselor, is there a friend of yours or teacher that she trusts? I agree with Diane. She feels safe letting her anger out around you because she loves you so much. Do you have a family friend or relative other then your ex who can take your daughter and son so you can have a few hours break?

The divorce and the new stepmom might be bothering her more than you think.   And what  she thinks. She may be confused having two "moms"  I would talk to your ex and see if you can see if he can have similar set of rules set up at his house.  These kids like routine and it sounds like the routine is different at his house.  Does he help out with her meds and doctor bills?  My ex used to let my youngest run wild at his house and I had to "deprogram" him from his house.  He has gotten alot better at letting him get away with everything and it has gotten better now.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Do you know where your divorce papers are?  I would read them and see if there is anything in them about your ex being responsible for 50% of your daughters medical bills.  My ex is self employed and doesn't send money like he should.  And a night in jail isn't going to faze him.  I only have my mom for help in babysitting but she is 77 years old so it is only for an hour or so at a time.  I could leave my youngest with my oldest now legally, but they would kill each other by the time I got home.  My mother has decided to stop driving in six months so I see doing more for at that time also.  So I know a little of what you are going through.  I can't afford a counselor right now either for my youngest and rely on school alot.  Thank god I do not have to fight them as much as some people here do.  I get up early than I need to so I have some time in morning without kids bothering me and get some peace and quiet before I am exhausted from the day.  But see if you can find out about the medical costs your ex may be responsible for, and maybe have doctor right a note saying your daughter needs to have this medication even at ex's house and tell him you are looking into seeing if there is anything you can do to make him comply with it legally.  There may be nothing you can do there but it might meret looking into.  [QUOTE=Wonderwoman]Hello everyone. It has been awhile. I had to let go of the internet for awhile due to the lack of money but I am in a little better standing now. Anyway, I am so exhausted right now so forgive me if I don't make any sense. My daughters Medicaid expired (I received no notice) so I then had to re-apply in which I was denied because I recently got a raise. I then had to apply for AllKids. Well I had to go an entire month with no insurance. I had to pay cash for all her meds. Well I then ran out of one med yesterday (Concerta) She was actually taking a lower dose than the Dr. wanted her on but I could not get a new script with out a visit of which I could not afford. Anyway, to make a real long story short I really believe she hates me. I have been really trying to remain firm in discipline techniques and she says I am mean. She says she has a new nice Mommy ( my ex just got re-married, we just divorced in Nov of this year). She says she want to run away and live with them. I am literally heartbroken and just numb. I feel like a horrible parent and a failure to my kids. I am not in a good place right now and probably use a visit to the dr. myself. I just don't know what to do. We went to McDonalds today after the Dr. appt. and she cursed at a group of teenagers calling them fat a**es and stupid idiots. They in return asked me how could such a beautiful little girl be so bad. I want to run away. [/QUOTE]

Firstly I wonder why DAD didn't take responsibility for paying for the child's medication if he knew you were short of cash? He may not agree with the diagnosis however, any court will see that as bullspit because that is the psychiatric diagnosis.

Time, my dear. Time. It all looks so peachy keener right now from the ex's perspective but really, the bloom will wear off the rose.

Don't let the kid 'play' you. She's angry and confused right now and she's taking it out on you.

If you can get out for a bit, give yourself some time and get some perspective. You're just feeling overwhelmed.

What did you do when she was calling the next table names?
MetisRebel39236.4943171296

Your story sounds like a co-worker's at work. be careful - the ex may not be giving her the meds when she is visiting so that may make things VERY diifficult for her when she gets back to your place. This happened to my co-worker.

She then  documented all doctor appts that the ex failed to show up for- had a pretty good lawyer who helped her with what she needed so that when they went to court to discuss custody and money, she had a trail of documentation indicating that the ex was not particiapting in MD prescribed plan of care- Since the ex never showed for the MD appts to voice concerns, the judge then ruled that the ex's opinion did not count and put in the agreement that meds had to be given, ex had to do xyz discipline plan, etc., etc. The judge basically said the ex wasn't a dead beat dad, but was one step from it and he better shape up.

Hang in there!

I took her to the bathroom after the name calling and spanked her. I use several different discipline techniques depending on the situation. I made her go and apologize to them and she did reluctantly. The kids kept saying oh it's okay she doesn't have to say anything. I told them that there is no excusing bad behavior and I did not allow foul language from a six year old. I don't want people to look at me in public and have pity on me. Or to excuse my daughters behavior. I don't want her to ever think that her condition is an excuse to misbehave. I just picked her up from her dad's. She seems okay so far. We will see. This past week was so hard.  I am looking at employment in Florida. I have always wanted to live there. I know it sounds horrible but maybe the visits would be less frequent then. We would only be 1 1/2 hours away. I figure if life is going to continue to be rocky I might as well live in a place that I love. The beach is my spiritual place. The one and only place i feel calm. Okay well I know I am rambling so I will go now. Thanks for the support . Good points lodismom--dad may well be interfering with the child's regimin in a number of ways.

I am curious to see how my dd did at the Boys and Girls club today. I hope I have the energy to be what she needs this week. I am so exhausted. I feel like I am turning into this mean witch. Not just at home but to everyone. I think it is because I give so much all the time I have nothing left to give. I have been a very considerate and nice person all my life. Really to a fault. Too nice, to trusting, kinda gullable. It has gotten me hurt way to many times. Is this the world we live in now? AGHHHHHH so frustrated.

Oh no! You poor thing.

You are not failing your kids by disciplining. I am sure you deep down really do know this. Of course on the surface she is going to think it is better wherver there are fewer rules, who wouldnt, but you know that is not true. Without the discipline and structure these kids couldnt survive!

Of course none of this is making you feel any better right now. Sounds like you need a little break. Is that possible?

Hang in there- it will get better.

Like Diane said, is it possible for you to get a small break.

My daughter is over THERE(her dad's) this weekend. I still have my son. It is extremely hard for me to get a total break. I feel so torn in letting her go to her dad's because she comes back soooooo disrespectful and hateful to me. But I do need the break you know. I am just at wits end. Hello everyone. It has been awhile. I had to let go of the internet for awhile due to the lack of money but I am in a little better standing now. Anyway, I am so exhausted right now so forgive me if I don't make any sense. My daughters Medicaid expired (I received no notice) so I then had to re-apply in which I was denied because I recently got a raise. I then had to apply for AllKids. Well I had to go an entire month with no insurance. I had to pay cash for all her meds. Well I then ran out of one med yesterday (Concerta) She was actually taking a lower dose than the Dr. wanted her on but I could not get a new script with out a visit of which I could not afford. Anyway, to make a real long story short I really believe she hates me. I have been really trying to remain firm in discipline techniques and she says I am mean. She says she has a new nice Mommy ( my ex just got re-married, we just divorced in Nov of this year). She says she want to run away and live with them. I am literally heartbroken and just numb. I feel like a horrible parent and a failure to my kids. I am not in a good place right now and probably use a visit to the dr. myself. I just don't know what to do. We went to McDonalds today after the Dr. appt. and she cursed at a group of teenagers calling them fat a**es and stupid idiots. They in return asked me how could such a beautiful little girl be so bad. I want to run away.