DarkAngel Journal Concerta and Hyperfocus | ADHD Information

Hi, DarkAngel !

... understand what you are going through. As I reflect it on my own medical treatment in 2003 it was proceeded totally different from my Doc. Here 1st I must say I had (and still have him) a specialist at my side, who is expert in treatment of drug abuse and substitution. That doesn't mean I did take drugs. Only want to say he is a deep experienced person for ADD/ADHD.

So to find the right dosis we took a period of time of 3-4 months. Your doc pushed up after a week from 18 to 36 mg, plus 100%. That's nonsense clearly to say. Your body / brain less needs learn over a period of 4-6 weeks to handle this kind of chemistry, it needs to adapt slowly to the changes.

In my view and my experience I am in contact with many from the ADD/ADHD scene here in Germany. Your kind of beginning the medical treatment seems fo rme naturally had to overforce you. (Hope my English isn't to bad to be understood clearly.)

I can follow your argumentations that you have the fear of a kind of "drug abuse", based on Methylphenidat (Concerta) or Atomoxetin (Strattera). But in regular cases of ADD you have not such side effects. Maybe you can be abused psychologically to feel more safe and build up your self confidence. But physically I have no case of "Ritalin abuse".

What to talk about is the rebound effect. Concerta as Retard helps to come through of 7-8 hours, no bundgeen effect. If I take 3x10mg per day (e.g. Equasym), it is really like driving roller caster. Empowering and re-tired... that's not so fine. And if I forget to take the 2nd or 3rd unit per day, it really can push me down emotionally and physically. But here in Germany, Concerta is so expensive, most doctors only treat the "standard" costs being covered by health insurance of government state.

On my own I use Methylphenidat when I need it. I do not take it daily. Meanwhile I know a lot about ADD / ADHD (even involved in developing therapy concepts) and having 3 1/2 years psychotherapy behind me I understand my "diferent being" to normal people. And I must say, in some aspects, I more and more like my AD(H)D being. So, why I should cover it becoming a "normal" by doping me ?? - If I need calmness, high concentration (e.g. meetings) and I know I have a long hard working day before me, I take it. That way many ADD people I know do it the same. Keep it flexible and in a relaxing way. Not every day can be a perfect day.

Certainly there is not a 100% guarantee if you take methylphenidat you have a positive reaction. Only 60% round about of medical treated people indicate such a positive change in mood, concentartion and impulse control... Maybe you are one of these people.

But maybe you have the wrong doctor who should be more carefully with the progress of highering up 100% from one week to another week.

Loosing friends in such a situation isn't unusual. Not nice, but the social abilities of ADD people is one weak point if not trained. Here I better would ask: Are they real friends. I lost everything in 2002, had a total crash (in psyche, economically and all of my social contacts, even in 2003 I lost my relationship). Later in the process of learning and therayp I more and more understood to seperate between false friends and true friends. That's even a reaction of learning about AD(H)D, not unnormal in my view. Especially if you are one of the more extrem ADHD persons... (like me I am a real thrillseking Hypy).

And with depression, I had too. But I learnd in psycho therayp 1st what is a depression. Never thought before I could be a depressive person (till 2002 I was consultant for strategic marketing). Before understanding as a work-aholoic I only thought some stupid thoughts like "I am too lazy cannot motivate myself". Being tired seemed for me only an indication of over-worked etc. ... I don't take medical treatment for drepression. - Yes, some days are really dark but better to go through the mud an learn by behavioural training and menthal change. The bad times become less and less.

So, we know about each other, that's an aspect to help through. The internet today is so important to grap the knowledge and enter into exchange of experiences. Even to know that maybe here in such a forum are the real friends who are interested truely about and care your person. - That way, keep in touch and together on the path of learning and healing our soals !

Greetings from Europe/Germany/Hamburg - JayAr.

// P.S.: Sorry for the pass away of your Aunt. We all are only guests here on this planet, for a very very short time in the living period of the whole universe. //

Hi Dark Angel,

I am a 42 year old who is self diagnosed ADHD.  My children both teenagers are ADHD and I can see so many traits in me.  I laughed so loudly with your basement - I have a garage like that - it is a huge disaster.  As a teacher, I have boxes and boxes of school "stuff".  I just can't deal with it.  It has been 4 years  waiting to get a car inside the garage!!!! 

My kids at times have said things like - "Have you had your tablet? "

Anyway I am going to look at getting a diagnosis - not really the done thing in Australia for adults.  Any other time I have been to the doctor they just talk about antidepressants. I just get overwhelmed with stuff!!!  When I have a class and am teaching, I will work ridiculous hours hyperfocusing.  In the end with 2 ADHD kids to look after I left because it was "killing me".  I just loved the thrill and the rush from working like this!!!!"  Unfortunately as I got older my body couldn't cope with it. 

I will be interested to see your journey!!  Welcome!

omg dark angel....u hit it right on the nail when u said hyper focus! i never knew what this term meant till u explained it and it totally describes me. if i'm not interested in something i procrastinate and wont focus on it but if i feel like doin something i hyper focus on it to the point that it wastes my entire day. i can relate to everything u said from ocd, depression, anxiety, being a cutter etc.. although i dont wish these things on anyone, its good to hear that someone can relate to me. how is the stratera working for u? 

to sensemakers....the concerta dosage that dark angel's dr prescribed her, was actually the exact way that my dr precribed concerta to me. 1 wk of 18 mgs, then 1 week of 36, 3rd week 54 mgs. ive heard a few adults say that was how it was rx'd to them too. could there be a difference in tweaking in the u.s and germany? or maybe its cuz concerta isnt prescribed often in germany. i dunno.   

Hi, Dark Angel !

nice to meet you. Just became member of the forum on my own. I was diagnosted in 01/2003 on ADHD (late at the age of 38 years). And now behind a 3 1/2 years psychotherapy. Same as you I started with medical treatment (Equasym, Concerta) and it is interesting to read your story and experiences.

Hope sharing new things about ADHD. - Greetings from Europe/Germany/Hamburg - JayAr.

Hey there,

Well I ended up stopping those meds.  I went through the first 7 days at 18mg, and stopped on my 2nd day of 36mg.

What happened to me was my motor skills were being disrupted badly, my eyes felt like I was a zombie,  heavy chest feeling, shaky and plain and simple I couldn't function AT ALL.  I was afraid to drive and I couldn't even add up simple things like a food list (amounts of food) for a float trip I was planning.  I had about 7 guests at my home all week and told them what med's I was on and to watch out for things.  They too saw my functioning decrease.

What's bizzare is late at night on two occassions over an entire week I sat down to have a few drinks (a depressant) with my out of town guests and after having a drink or two I finally felt 'normal' again.  I could think straight and get certain things done when I couldn't on the meds.

What was happening is the amphetamine was reacting in me like I suppose it would in a 'hyperactive' AD'H'D child/ adult, whereas my issue is inattentive.

I informed my doctor that in my 20's I had had plenty of experience with methamphetamines and that the drug reacted in me how one would feel after a 5-6 day binge on the 'come down side'.. whereas what I was hoping for was the concentration I needed and 'umph' to get tasks and cleaning done.

Mind you, ... I've been completely drug free for 9 years and doing fantastic as far as that goes.  So, after having such a terrible time with the Concerta I went back to the doctor and explained everything that happened and he put me on Straterra, 25 mg for 7 days, 40 mg for 7 days, then 60 mg for 7 days then he's given me a script fo 80 mg after all that is done.  I am on the 40mg, 2-3 day at the moment.  He said it would take a while for these to work IF they even work.

I'm a bit frustrated, but I wanted to at least try seeing as these are a non-stimulant. So, I'm trying.  I will say though that I'm going through a lot of stress at the moment I've lost two friends and my Aunt passed away in the last week.

So, hopefully this works I so badly want to feel normal again and my depression is awful.  Doc said he wanted to hold off on the depression meds though.  I have no idea why

....

 

Anyway, anyone that reads this that has had an experience like mine please post and let me know your thoughts.  Any bit of advise is appreciated.

 

Much love and respect to all those struggling,

DAngel

 

 

Hey folks,

I'm new to the boards and only on my 4th day of Concerta 18mg, then on my 8th day I'm supposed to jump to 36mg and then Doc said he sees my goal range up in the 60-70'ish range.

I've been browsing the boards reading and it's interesting to see all of the people like myself sharing.  It really helps to see the discussions to know sometimes what to look forward to or difficulities that may come up.

I can really relate to LadyChaos? I believe that was the nickname.  I'm only just now hearing the word (hyperfocus) from this board and I went to read up on it some and I'm 100% hyperfocus to which I 'thought' I was just Obsessive Compulsive.  I have had OC at times in the past, but I can so relate to when I finally find something (for instance like re-vamping my counseling website), that I'm interested in I've been known to sit and work non-stop for weeks on end just zoned out in my work until I drop from exhuastion.  *Hence, not taking care of all the things I should be taking care of from lack on interest or things being overwhelming. Heck my basement went untouched as a choatic mess for 4 years before I could finally tackle it.  Every time I went to the basement I'd literally cringe and feel sick/ overwhelmed.  Same goes for housework, I hyperfocus so much on my online work I do that I can't take myself away from my projects.

Build a website that is a marvel to see sure,... but make my bed? HAH...

I'm 36 years old and was observed as a child in pre-school and it was said back then that I had ADD tendancies.  (Of course) back then in the early 70's I don't believe there was really a direct name for it, at least that I know of at this time.

Growing up was really havoc on me, never understanding why I couldn't read books, bored in school, falling asleep, depression bigger than Mount Olympus, becoming a 'cutter' before the age of 10 because I could feel 'something not right in my brain chemistry and never understanding what was wrong with me.  I'm classic for the, "Feeling like a disappointment to people," especially my folks.  However, when I would find things, (which was rare), that would interest me, man O man I got it done like a "CHAMP" and with skill and passion and flare.

If I had to list out all my issues I dealt with in my life this would become a novel quite quickly but I have also suffered from some phobias, panic attacks, anxiety, OC, major depression and of course my ADD.

When I was 22 I went to a family reunion and it finally made sense to me when I found out that 90% of my mom's family suffers from ADD/ADHD, depression, alcolhol and drug abuse, mental health issues and most all of them were on medicine.  I was sort of in shock about hearing them all talk about it and my family then gave me a lot of handouts to read up on the matter.  My mother and I also at that time finally understood why perhaps we always clashed so much and it's because she has it as well, although untreated.

I had a life changing event recently and finally, and after now finally having insurance after not having it for most of my adult life, decided to see about 'helping myself' get better.  This of course included calling a psychiatrist.  It took me 'two years' of holding on to the referral number from my Doctor to finally call them to seek help.  I cried on the phone even making the appointment.

I had previously been on depression medicine.  I started those about 3-4 years ago.  Zoloft made me a complete zombie, the Lexapro worked some however engaging in any sexual activity was nil and void and I was always so dang tired and then because of insurance purposes I had to switch to Celexa, same problem. Even on the meds my depression seemed to be helped some but I ended up having some bad episodes, especially when I would 'forget' to take them? lol... Gotta just love that fun part of ADD.  I had asked my Doc to treat me for ADD, but he refused (which lead to my panic) about calling a psychiatrist and waiting two years to finally call.  I took myself off the meds because I just couldn't take being so tired all the time and because one of my three careers is a professional driver.  Driving so tired was simply dangerous.  So, along with many femal related medical problems that have aided me in my depression and physical pain it's been fairly harsh living circumstances the last few years.

I'm not sure how I feel right now even on this low dosage other than my eyeballs are 'heavy' feeling like a zombie, dry mouth, fast paced heart beat.  I'm still hyperfocusing 'majorly' and really hope that as my meds increase I can find some 'balance' here.

I was so excited to finally try and feel NORMAL but not quite sure how I feel yet.  I hope this works because I'm really tired of what I have had to go through my entire life and just want to do all the things I know I can do.

Anyway, thanks for listening and I'm glad I found this board to read and post and discuss this new path in my life.  I don't have any family in my State and only a cpl friends from work I talk to on a rare occassion so being able to talk about this here I'm sure will be beneficial to me.

Have a wonderful day and I hope every finds their personal happiness and place they want to be at in life.

DarkAngel

 

 

 

Welcome DarkAngel. This is a great place for you to find help and support.Welcome DarkAngel. It may take a bit of dosage adjustment before you finally feel 'normal' I wouldn't expect that the low dose you're currently on would work if your Dr thinks your target dose is much higher. BUT.. you never know. Everyone's different with how the body metabolizes the meds.

Hey there and thanks for the welcome and replies.  

This is Day 5 for me.  Yesterday my body seemed to handle it a 'little' better but I still dealt with the pounding/racing heart when I was cleaning up my house and still some of that zombie feeling.  I have guests coming in this next week so I'm not sure if I was getting things done out of fear of a messy house or the medicine aided me, or both.

I realize it's a low dose, and only 5 days, however I wanted to keep track of what my thoughts and feelings are during my dosages and increased levels.

Thanks again for listening,

DarkAngel