adderall experiences/concerns - input?? | ADHD Information

 

I've been at 40 mg Adderall xr for a year--nowhere near your 100 mg.  I've taken a few "med holidays" and the "withdrawal" period that I consciously experience is over in 48-72 hours (a combination of being impatient/on edge and either wanting to sleep or eat all the time).

Have you thought about, rather than stopping stimulant medication cold turkey, switching to some other type of stimulant (or non-stim as Diane V suggests)?  You may have tried them all and Adderall is best, but seems to me, if you want to give yourself a break from Adderall but still want some relief from your symptons that a switch rather than nothing is about your only other alternative.

Another option... switch to regular Adderall, either partially or totally. Theoretically out of your system sooner than the xr,  using it could reduce the amount that is in your system 24/7.  My family doctor says it's important for your brain to be free of stimulants at some point each day (i.e.  when sleeping) to help prevent dependency.

new here...trying to find some answers..."brief" explanation: growing up i was put on adderall, when i was 14 or 15...i hated it. i hated the way it made me feel, and i was already depressed to begin with but with the adderall on top of it i was a wreck. finally i decided to just stop taking it, against my mothers judgement. thing is i didnt realize then what i know now - she is addicted. has been for a long time...was stealing my medication and using up all that she was perscribed, etc. bottom line i got to see the worst possible side effects of adderall in front of my eyes. i witnessed and was even victimized through her own chaotic experiences - first, irritability, mood swings, hyperfocus (entire days were often spent in front of her computer), etc. then, the paranoia, manic depression, hallucinations and psychotic thoughts. i once caught her talking to her tv - and it wasnt turned on. now shes much better and a lot more stable, but there are still few subtle remainders of her past frenzy. shes still somewhat paranoid, but not nearly to the extent as before.
this all brings me to my current situation. im on adderall xr, and ive been back on it for about 6 months now. i started at 20mg/day and am now at 100 mg/day. i know this is a lot, but anything less doesnt cut it. my mom argues that both her and my brother (the only one not addicted yet needs it the most) experience a higher tolerance to the meds and they were on around the same number of mg per day. im not naive, but i do find this to be a valid argument because personally things like sugar and caffeine and energy drinks have never had any affect on me like they do on many. so i figure i also have a high tolerance to amphetamine and other relative and derived chemical substances. the thing is that its been 6 months, and the only side affects that are apparent and worrysome are the 15 lbs i lost and the personality changes. i find myself a lot more closed off and more content when im by myself and easily irritated by others. i often spend way too much time on one mundane task without realizing it. also, it should be mentioned that i have been taking prozac to treat my depression for about 5 years now and have successfully maintained it thus far. now i feel a lot more moody and depressed and im wondering if the adderall is counteracting the anti depressant or if i just need to increase my prozac to compensate. i have increased it and havent noticed much of a differene in terms of side effects from the prozac, but  the only way to tell if it is good to combat the adderall is to observe prolonged and consistent usage. i dont want to be sad again, because when i fall i dont have anything to pick me back up but myself. i guess thats what the adderall has been serving for.
now, i fear im addicted to it and feel that i cant function without it. i never want to go down that road, and i dont ever want my children to see me the way that we saw my mother. and seeing her now and all shes been through, im scared to end up like that. thing is, she was addicted to so many different things growing up that i wouldnt know if this is her typical behavior and attitude or if its a result of irreversible damage. given her history, both are equally possible.
after doing some research into adderall, it appears to me that no one has concluded any long-term side effects, only the ones we all know about - dry mouth, decreased appetite, weight loss, irritability, tremor, etc. i find it incredibly shocking that after all the controversy surrounding the drug there has been no medical revelations of any kind indicating that consistent use of adderall over a period of time can alter ones brain chemistry. what i fear is that what now may seem to me to be an addiction that i will eventually grow out of is actually going to be what destroys me, and i have no knowledge or facts or even someone with experience to help guide me through this rigid path. im leading myself, and on top of it, im blindfolded.
i guess what im hoping for is for someone who shares similar experiences or who might be able to give me some insight regarding anything to do with adderall xr. i could always go cold turkey and single out each symptom myself, but as we all know withdrawal is worse the longer youve been on it and the more youve been taking. so considiering its been 6 months and 100 mg a day, im going to go ahead and speculate that a month set aside for withdrawl might not even cut it. i dont have that kind of time even it did - i need to support myself somehow, im only a broke college kid living off of loan money. if anyone has any advice or possible insight i would greatly appreciate it. if anyone has any information out there regarding long term side effects, please let me know. i do not want to be controlled by this drug. i do not want to hurt myself nor those around me the way that my mom hurt me.
and yes, i do have both a psychologist and a psychiatrist. my psychologist can only help so much with her little experience with the drug (i find that those who know best are those who have travelled the same road). my psychiatrist has given his opinions and insight, but i still always have doubts since theres so little research of evidence compiled with the drug. a second opinion is not an option due to lack of funds. plus its hard to trust any psychiatrist these days - its impossible to know whether the drug they are perscribing you is because they feel it will legitimately help you or because theyre earning an extra buck off of it. thats why i love the internet, you can get all sorts of opinions and you can decide for yourself what seems to be the most reliable source without the hastle of co pays and appointments and such. so please, no responses advising me to ask my doctor instead of wasting any one elses time. thank you.
paloma - for us with ADHD and not abusing the meds - there is a very small chance of becoming dependent in the way your mother obviously did.  Don't beat yourself up over it - if it wasn't your adderall it would have been meth or any number of other stimulants she would have chosen.  An addictive personality will drink after shave if not given other options. 

Since you are obviously on a very tight budget you should look into ways to get the most for your dollar.  Check out the partnership for prescription assistance at www.pparx.org.  They help out people with low incomes by subsidizing your prescriptions through the manufacturers. 

You can also check out alternatives such as dexedrine (dextroamphetamine sulphate).  It's similar to adderall but is generic and is cheaper. 

If you are dead set to avoid any chance of dependence on stimulants you could try a higher level of caffeine.  I used it unknowingly to work on my ADHD through university (several cans of Jolt Cola, coffee, etc.) and it helped a great deal in keeping my ADHD under control.

Best wishes.

Personally, I have three left (20mg), and im done.  I was on 25mg, but when that didn't cut it, I increased my dose as needed.  But when do you stop increasing???  I have a friend who takes up to 120mg per day (I doubt thats her prescribed dose).  She is a mess.  Personally, I think the stuff is scary.  It can be your best friend and your worst enemy, especially if you are prone to addiction/dependance issues. It does change your personality.  Im trying to figure out who I really am without the Adderall.  Cause that motivated, focused, confident person I was didn't last very long.  I am going to try Wellbutrin, which is used to treat ADD, Depression, and will hopefully help me quit smoking (can't do it on Adderall).  Adderall was the pill I had always wanted - I lost my appetite, was focused, motivated, organized, confident, etc...  But I think I lost myself, and could have been on a path that would be very destructive.  My psychiatrist insists "there is no withdrawel"  He thinks its all in your head because you know how hard and sad it will be to stop.  I guess its like a loss.  Therefore, depression and fatigue.  I have to say, I have had some really good days off of it.  I'm sick of feeling like I have an endless to do list, and my goal all day is to complete as much as possible.  I much rather play with my daughter, and leave the laundry until tomarrow.

Well I can tell you my daughter took Adderrall a few years ago. Although at first it seemd to work well, except the appetite suppressant, it eventually raised her anxiety and she became irritable and "sad". We ended up taking her off it. At that time, and now again, we have put her on tricyclic antidpressants. Currently Despiramine. Desipramine is a 2nd line choice for ADHD treatment as well as for anxiety/depression. It's not as commonly used as the SSRI's for anxiety/depression or stimulants for ADHD as it has to build in your system (unlike stimulants) and requires EKG/lab tests (unlike SSRI's). She has taken Nortryptiline in the past and done well as it was ONE med that helped both anxiety and attentional issues. We only stopped the Nortiptyline as she couldnt get to target dose without the sedating side effect. So, anyway, here we are buliding Desipramine. You can google Desipramine and read about it, talk to your current psychiatrist. This is again probably not first choice to help with focus, but in our case she cannot tolerate the side effects of any stimulant. Another option is trying the stimulants in the methyphedinate family, Ritilan, Concerta, Metadate, Focalin, Daytrana.......there's more, lots of options there and it'd be a stimulant, if that is the treatment of choice.