Worrying about my 14 year old son and his the deterioration of his working memory. I have been reading alot of material on the affect of anxiety on memory. He is full of anxiety and I just don't see how we are going to get around it. He is angry and never says sorry /apologises for any of his behaviours. He will deny everything. His report card was awful and every teacher has written the same comments. He can't remember anything at the moment and it is a real concern. The studies I have read explain that your working memory has a limited capacity. When you are anxious, part of this memory is allocated to watching for the threat - therefore a survival mechanism. This is why kids do so poorly in tests if they are extremely anxious.
I'm at my wits end and don't know what to do! We had an appointment with the psychiatrist last week - his solution is to get him out of school. School is too stressful and therefore all he is learning is avoidance. is academic levels are now at the 10 year old level - Was at the 14 year old level 2 years ago. Maths in now at the 8 percentile on stanardised tests.
He doesn't care if he is failing - he tells me that the teachers are all lying. Working with me is just awful.
Started him on avanza to help with the sleep problem - increased zoloft slightly and while on holidays will go back onto QR ritalin rather than concerta.
What do we do?
HAPPY I HAVE A SIMILAR ISSUE MY SELF , BUT I SEPERATE MYSELF AS A TRAUMA ADHD. ANY STRESS AN I BECOME NEARLY IN COMPETENT.
FORGIVE ME FOR SAY THIS BUT HE MAY NEED TO BE HOME WITH YOU , HOME SCHOOLED TO AT LEAST GET HIS ACEDEMICS ACCOMPLISHED.
FOR ME ITS LIKE A NARROWING OF VISION.
IN TCI TRAING THEY DID AN EXERCISE WHER 20 PEOPLE STOOD IN A CIRCLE AND THE STARTER THREW A BALL TO ANYONE BUT YOU HAD TO SAY THEYRE NAME AND THEN THE STARTER THREW IN TEN MORE BALLS . BECOMING SO FOCUSED ON WHERE THE BALL WAS COMING FROM I COULDNT EVEN SEE WHERE THE PERSON NEXT TO ME WAS THROWING THE BALL.
THAT IS VERY SIMILAR TO MY ADHD BRAND OF INATTENTIVENESS.
I STILL DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT.
I DO KNOW THAT A TYPICALL MEMORY GOES THROUGH A PROCESS.
FIRST YOU WITNESS THE MEMORY AND PROCESS WHAT IT MEANS TO YOU
YOU THEN HAVE ABOUT THREE SECONDSTO DECIDE IF ITS NEEDED TO BE REMEMBERED AS PRIORITY. THEN ABOUT AN ADDITIONAL 7 SECONDS TO REREMEBER IT TO STORE IT PERMANATELY.
OF SO WHAT THAT MEANS .
PAINTED LINES ON THE HIGH WAY IN THE STATES THEY USUALLY 8FEET LONG 6 FEET APART AND WHITE BETWEEN LANES.
WE ALLL KNOW WEVE SEEN ABOUT A MILLION BUT ITS REALLY HARD TO REMEMBER ANY ONE OF THEM IN PARTICULAR BUT WHEN WE DO SEE THEM WE KNOW EXACTLY WHAT THEY MEAN AND ARE THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LIFE AND DEATH.
SO SOMETIME I DONT TROUBLE WITTH FOCUS . RATHETR PRIORITY AND PERMANATE STORAGE.
ITS A TECHNIQUE OF MY OWN USE.
I DRAW A SPACIAL MAP OF WHAT IM DOING AND LEARNING AND PUT IT ALL ON ONE SHEET AS ICONES OR NAMES.
THEN I KEEP REDRAWING IT UNTIL ITS ALL IN MY HEAD PERMANATELY.
SO ITS LIKE SAYING HEY HAPPYROCK GO OUT TO THE NEAREST PAINTED LINE ON THE ROAD AND GO SIX LINES TO THE RIGHT PUT A RED STICKER ON IT THEN GO 16 TO THE LEFT AND PUT BLUE STICKERS ON EVERYOTHER LINE FOR TEN LINES AND THE GO RIGHT THREE LINES AND PUT A YELLOW STICKER ON EVERY THIRD LINE.
MY BET IS IF YOU MADE A MAP OF THE STICKER PLACEMENTS ABOUT TWO OR THREE TIME REPEATEDLY YOU COULD DO IT IN YOUR HEAD - LIKE AN EXPERT BUT I BET YOU COULDNT TELL ME HOW MANY CARS PASSED YOU WHILE PLACING THEM DOWN ON THE LINES.
SO ITS A PRIORITY DIFFERENCE THE CARS USED TO BE THE THREAT BUT HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH THE MAP
THE SCHOOL ENVIRONMENT HAS THESES MANY THREATS THAT NARROW FOCUS ONLY ON THE STRESS DANGER. AND NOT THE LESSONS.
I KNOW THIS IS BIZARE AND HAVE MANY NORMAL PEOPLE SAY ITS COMPLETLY STUPID. BUT HEY WHEN I ACE THE MAP CRITERIA THEY HAVE NOTHING TO SAY.
I WORK IN A ENVIRONMENT OF ADHD TEENS THA ARE LOCKED IN DORM.
THERE ARE MANY UNITS 7 IN FACT. I ONLY WORK ON BOYS UNITS.
FOR STABILITY THEY MOVE ME AROUND ABOUT ONCE EVERY TWO MONTHS .
BUT THAT FIRST DAY I COME BACK TO A UNIT. THE SOME KIDS HAVE BEEN REALEASED SOME ARE NEW AND THER ARE MANY THINGS TO REMEBER ADOUT ALL OF THEM, WHO HAS WHICH PRIVLEGES AND WHAT PROTOCOLS DO THEY HAVE AND WHO DO THEY GET ALONG WITH. THERES NO TIME TO FIGURE ALL THAT OUT IN THE INSTANT THAT IT IS NEEDED.
MY NORMAL CO WORKERS SEEM TO GRASP ALL THESE CHANGES WITH CONFIDENCE .
I MAKE A MAP AND CHECK IT TWICE AND FIGURE OUT WHOSE NAUGHTY OR NICE .
RARELY DO I WIND UP WITH MANY OUTBURSTS AT ONCE. SO I REFERE TO MY MAP AND DIVIDE AND PROMPT GOOD BEHAVIOR.
WHEN I DONT DO A MAP THE KIDS STRESS ME OUT AND MY VISION NARROWS AND THEY KNOW THIS WORKS ON STAFF SO THEY WILL CONTINUALLY DO THIS SO THIER BUDDIES IN OTHER ROOMS CAN BE UNSEEN DOING WHATEVER THEYRE GONNA DO , SO I LEARN WHOSE THE MANIPULATORS AND WHOSE THE BEHAVIOR AND WHO NEEDS ATTENTION AND PUT THEM ON A SCETCH MAP AND IN VERY MUCH ON MY GAME IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN.
SO LOOK INTO SPACIAL MAP SOFTWARE AND
ADHD PEOPLE RESPOND TO VISUAL REMINDERS AND NEED MEDS TO SEE THESE REMINDERS IN THIER THOUGHTS.
FOR ME I CANT LEARN FROM LECTURES BUT FROIM THE PAMPLET
WHEN I DO LEARN FROM LECTURES ITS BECAUSE THE CLASS IS SMALL AND I HAVE ALREADY COVERED THE MATERIAL
ommas39256.6623958333Happyrock I know here there are tutors that can be hired to homeschool for you. I am not sure if you have that option or if it is feasible financially, but it is a thought. So your son could be home and out of the school environment that is stressing him, but it would keep you out of the mix. If there is so much tension in your relationship already, you need to be his Mom, and not every Mom can be the teacher too. I know you are a teacher, but you need to be Mom first, only you know if it would work for you to homeschool.